I hate night shift

RNsRWe, ASN, RN · Apr 13, 2015

Well, the part of your post asking if it's normal to have anxiety when one is working as a new nurse, trying to get used to the unit and get used to having a patient load all to oneself....THAT is normal.

The part asking about "separation anxiety" on the part of an adult because he/she can't see the spouse every minute of the day...or at least not during working hours....is NOT NORMAL.

I can tell you that it's far too early to see how you will turn out in the end regarding the unit you are on, and the workload that comes with it. But I can also tell you that if you have ANY aspirations of becoming an NP, you can expect to spend time away from your husband for classes, clinicals, and yes, employment. I don't happen to know any NPs who work in the private sector who don't put in lots of time/overtime/into the evening kind of time.

Honestly, I'd say you'd have to take a good hard look at why you cry when you aren't with your husband, and even cry because you are ABOUT to go to work (away from him). I'm sorry, but this is just not normal, and obviously not healthy. Please talk to a professional mental health counselor about this, as I think (just based on what you said here) it'd be a DARNED good idea.

Good luck to you!

Jules A, MSN · Apr 13, 2015

I am currently applying for NP school since really the reason I came into the nursing profession was so I could obtain my FNP degree and work in a Dr office and have more one on one time with patients and of course have better hours sometimes.

I'm thinking it isn't all about the night shift and in my experience days have always been busier so I'm pretty sure that isn't going to answer all your complaints.

BTW when you find that NP job in a Drs office with so much extra time with your patients please let us know where it is so we can apply too! My friends who are working as FNPs have patients scheduled back to back every 10-15 minutes. I'm luckier in psych to have 20 minute med checks but trust me I'm running around like a chicken with its head cut off most days with the burden of trying to accurately diagnose and not kill someone with the medications I'm sending them out on that they never take as prescribed.

allnurses Guide · Apr 13, 2015

Crying every day because you don't want to leave your spouse has me scratching my head. Even if you were working a M-F day job you would have to leave him to go to work. I suspect your anxiety and unhappiness with your job is making you overly emotional about other things.

Regarding crying about your spouse, time to pull up your big girl panties and accept this is a temporary pathway to get you where you really want to be. Also known as "I signed up for this". If you can't do that, you need to find another job or see your physician to see what can be done to help you adjust.

The new grad stuff is super normal. I hated night shift too and got off it at my first opportunity, which was 4.5 months in. Day shift was just a different ball of yarn with far more stress, but far more sleep, which helped mitigate the stress. I cried at work maybe twice. If you are doing it daily, you need to talk to your physician because you aren't adjusting well. Is this your first ever job? I have to ask. So many young (my own included) seem to have a hard time adjusting to having to do things they don't particularly want to do. You may need some help getting up to speed in the coping department.

FNP will still have some night duties, as you will be on call. You won't have more time with the patients due to modern day compensation making it impossible to turn a profit without smushing people into the appointment slots upways, downways and sideways. Every job is going to have SOMETHING you dislike. Repeat that to yourself daily. Maybe even several times a day. There is no such thing as a perfect job.

SmilingBluEyes · Apr 13, 2015

You sound like you have issues with anxiety. I would seek counseling and find an outlet, like working out or a hobby you love.

If it becomes debilitating, you need to look at what you can do to change it and maybe reconsider being a nurse.

Being an FNP you will work VERY HARD------numerous appointments back to back, like said. And the paperwork? Mountainous.

It's true, the grass is not always greener and all that.

Maybe shadow FNPs a while to get a good idea. And for now, accept you have to walk this path to your ultimate goal.

The best FNPs have several years' nursing experience before going on for school.

Again, consider counseling. And breathe. Best wishes.

Atl-Murse · Apr 13, 2015

I think there is deeper issue going on here

Wrangler156 · Apr 13, 2015

A few comments here are making me feel attacked to be completely honest, then a few are helpful as well. Yes this is my first " actual" job I had an internship and externship while in nursing school that lasted about 7 months prior to accepting my first RN job, I really enjoyed it, it was day shift and weekends as well I wasn't thrilled about weekends but I was OK with it because I got to come home to my husband at night and cook dinner together, etc.

I think I may of lead people on the wrong direction when I made the statement about NPs, I am aware I will have 15-20min with each pt, etc in an office, but I have shadowed multiple NPs during my nursing school career and I absolutely LOVED my NP days in busy offices vs my RN clinical days on the floor. I think I am having a hard time with this job because I am away in the evening and yes I sleep during the day, but I am always exhausted and then still exhausted for 2 days after I get off work then I have 1 day then I am back to work again. My intern and externship was 12hr days 3 days/week plus I was in school running every which direction for clinicals and every thing else, but in the past I have thrived on a busy schedule just apparently not so much in the hospital. I do good with paperwork always have, I have always said NP is where I am meant to be, but this floor is killing me, 6 and 7 pts (tonight I will have 5 thank goodness which I am still eh with but whatever). I am currently looking at new jobs that are day shift and critical care/acute care/ step down since I need critical/acute care experience. I am going to go speak to my manager next week to address my issues and see if she will allow me to leave early if I were to get the day shift position. day shift I am a lot better emotionally/mentally than night shift I have always been prone to depression and anxiety I had not ever worked night shift until these past 4 months and quite honestly I will be good if I can make it to the 6 month mark.

LovelyBlue · Apr 13, 2015

Reading your post, I can relate, I am a new nurse (3months) working night shift at a hospital with tendency to be understaffed. The struggle is real. At those times when I feel like I just can't continue, deep soul searching has been in order. My goal is to obtain 1-2 years of Med-Surg experience, so I need to make it happen. Having the mind set that it is only a passing experience that will lead to my dream job years down the road helps. But how can I make sure that my care meets standards for all 7 patients? This is an ever-evolving task that I continue to form only with a positive and future-focused attitude. Self-sacrifice is necessary. Even the sacrifice of time from my family. Even when I am off from work, I have a work hangover, which means my kids will be watching TV while I nap. It's pretty sad. However, down the line, our future will be extraordinary. I do expect that things will get easier 3-6 months as I become quicker at anticipating patient needs and develop my therapeutic skills.

allnurses Guide · Apr 13, 2015

Five at night is pretty cushy. Most med/surg or tele/stepdown jobs are around 6-7 at night.

Who do you see taking your patients if you get to leave early on day shift? How do you envision that working and how do you envision your relationship with your coworkers if your manager were to let this happen (she or he won't/can't)?

I think your expectations are playing a part in your unhappiness. Nobody is attacking you. You sound like you need more help than this board can provide.

Calinurse4 · Apr 13, 2015

I can relate to what you're saying. I also have had many nights I cried having to go to work. People can think it's crazy and I need professional help (?) but after spending 18 years of my life sleeping next to my husband every night, that's a tough connection to lose. We have been together over 20 years and this has been the most difficult, trying time for our relationship. I hated leaving my husband and children while they were all getting ready for bed. They were gone at work/school all day, then I was trying to nap before work, so I wasn't seeing them much and it was difficult. I have been on night shift for a year and a half and I have reached my limit. I have just started a new job on day shift. I hope you get to "pay your dues" quickly and move to a different shift. Everyone and every relationship is different; I'm glad NOC works for some but it didn't work well for my family and me.

calivianya, BSN, RN · Apr 13, 2015

I don't think anyone's attacking you. There is no harm in getting help if you need it, and it sounds like you need some help. I made an emergency primary care visit once because I was struggling with some life things and I had a total ugly sobbing breakdown in the office when I got there. I am always envious of the people who can be pretty when they cry because my face swells up and my pale complexion goes tomato-colored around my eyes. I couldn't believe how helpful and kind my physician was. I bet he was surprised when he walked into the room because I had always been very put-together and professional up until that point.

I ended up leaving the office with a short-term, extremely low dose of antidepressants because he and I both agreed it was situational and I just maybe needed a little help getting through the rough patch. I took ONE pill and knew instantly it wasn't for me. The side effects were so terrible that I sort of came to myself and sucked it up because I decided that nothing in the entire world could be as horrible as taking that one pill. It was Effexor, if anyone is curious, and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I got my life back on track after that and I am very happy now.

If you are really struggling, there is no shame in asking for help. It sounds like you are really struggling. At least go and talk to someone - you might be surprised at how good it feels to talk to a professional.

BrandonLPN, LPN · Apr 13, 2015

If night shift and separation anxiety are causing you this much anxiety maybe you should look into finding a job as an RN in a doctor's office. The M-F, 9-5, no holidays and all that should be more in line with the rest of the world's schedule.

No, you won't get the acute care experience you say you want. And there would likely be a substantial pay cut compared to whatever you're making now. These are the trade-offs for getting desirable hours and for getting a relatively more "normal" office environment.

For every decision we make, there's consequences and trade-offs, unless one is very lucky, or has very good connections. Most of the NPs you know put in time as floor nurses in one sense or another because, really, who would want to hire a NP without some practical experience.

Maybe you can work as a floor nurse on a very part-time basis while trying to work on.... whatever the requirements for NP school are (I honestly have no idea what that process is). If your husband can support you, I see that as being your least stressful option.