How would you respond to this??

[nurse678]

So I'm in the car with my fiance and future in-laws...somehow the topic of shall we say "cleaning patients up" came up. My soon to be mother-in-law looks shocked when I reply that I do this every night at work, as she replies, "You have to clean patients at work?? Where my mom lives, only the aides do and those girls work really hard! They should get paid more than the nurses. All nurses ever do is give meds."

WOAH. What??? Like I get aides do a lot of dirty work and I respect them for all they do but what?? How about the education nurses receive and the critical thinking we need to incorporate into "just giving meds." UGH I am beyond frustrated. I didn't even respond to her, mostly because I was in shock that that statement came out of her mouth knowing that her future daughter-in-law is a nurse...but now that it has been a few hours since, I wish I could have set her straight.:grn:

What are you thoughts? How would you have responded?

[lrobinson5]

I just wonder why she feels that poop>heart medication. I mean I know people always fixate on the "gross" aspect of the job, but really? Maybe you should bring up some of the things involved with JUST passing meds.

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

This is what I was trying to get thru to people on another thread. We really aren't seen by the public as being critical thinkers, or anything else really for that matter, rather just bum wipers & pill givers. I used to get teased by my future inlaws as a bum wiper all the time - I was young so it didn't bother me.

The public are VERY ignorant of what we do - don't expect much else.

I would probably sit her down & tell her quickly what we do do, but I doubt it will do much to change her mind re nurses.

An old doctor told me once when I felt like you: It doesn't matter what other people think of you or your work. You are doing your work as a professional and/or studying to make YOU feel better, not them, and to make yourself feel proud of YOU.

I think that's all that matters. Though I couldn't stay silent with a comment like that - she'd get a mouthful from me - but that's my Irish fiesty side talking!

[That Guy, BSN, RN, EMT-B]

Stopped the car and wish her a nice walk home :)

More like kick her out of the car so she has to get admitted and see all the work that nurses do for herself.

[AgentBeast, MSN, RN]

More like kick her out of the car so she has to get admitted and see all the work that nurses do for herself.

Patient's never see all that work that nurses put into their care. In fact they might only see 5% of it.

[ParkerBC,MSN,RN, PhD, RN]

I have an uncle who I just don’t get along with…here is how our conversation went.

Uncle: “I can’t believe you get paid what you do to wipe assess.”

Me: “I can’t believe your pay, with no high school education, can’t think your way out of a wet paper bag, and for pushing a broom for eight hours a day. You are exactly why I do not buy GM vehicles. So, tell me how does it feel being part of a company with: the inability to manage its’ workforce, requesting a bailout from the government, AND still filing for bankruptcy protection. Now that is something to be proud of!”

It shut him quick. By the way…he is paid 34.75/hour and gets all of the overtime he wants.

Sometimes one has to be direct. While I am one who exercises public relation skills and trying to keep everyone happy, there are times when I say the hell with it.

[canaryred]

I agree with Dixielee - you have to pick your battles and you probably don't want to pick many with your future mother-in-law. Over the years she will learn you worth - in more ways than just in nursing. Good luck.

[Lifeofanurse]

oh my!

Sounds like your in for a rough ride my friend.

Unless she's Edith Bunker she truly knows better and that was a bait....

Let the games begin...and your not even married yet!

Good Lord! I'll be praying for you!

[mofomeat]

Fwiw, nursing is my 3rd or 4th career change, depending on how you look at it.

This sort of thing happens to people in all of them.

It doesn't sound like she was trying to insult you. She just seems ignorant.

ooomonkeys sums it up. This is pretty much the long and short of it. Don't take it personal. In the future, slowly, over time... try to educate her on what you do and what you don't do. Don't be upset if it does no good, as some people just won't change. And that is ok.

As your future MIL her opinion of you counts a bit. But her opinion of your job doesn't. Really, all that matters is the opinion of your fiancee, right?

[caliotter3]

Not really worth the effort, or the hard feelings that would come about from saying something. Most folks have no idea exactly do, other than wiping butts and passing pills.

In total agreement with Scott. Not worth the effort and hard feelings. Then, someone would be able to go around and tell others how "uppity" you think you are. Best to keep quiet and make the relatives look for things to be critical about.

[Rodoon, BSN, MSN, RN]

Trust me, her tune will change the minute she's admitted to a hospital. She'll tell everyone not to bother doing the small things like bed baths 'cause her super-sweet D-I-L is an amazing nurse and will take care of it.

[eCCU]

Ask her if she would rather have the aide with no idea of how the pills work give the mother the pills instead of the Nurse who is educated on the medication and its effect. Would she prefer the aide who has no idea what her diagnosis means update her doctor or the Nurse who is educated?

[nola1202]

You're right_______, the CNA's do work really hard, they could use a raise....so could I. So how bout that world series!