How to react nicely if a patient asks for your social media acct?

NotMyProblem MSN, ASN, BSN, MSN, LPN, RN · Sep 11, 2016

I have told them that I'm not allowed to establish anything but a professional nurse-to-patient relationship on the job. Anyone that I know personally, including via social media, I choose not to care for professionally.

I never deviate from this...makes it easier to do an already-stressful job.

Cat365 · Sep 11, 2016

Just stick with "Sorry, it's against company policy."

Libby1987 · Sep 11, 2016

A sincere, "That's so sweet but we're advised not to combine Facebook with our patient relationships."

And often followed by something like, "you're stuck with me as your nurse.." depending on the personality involved.

The key is for it not to come across as rejection to their overture. People love knowing you're invested as their nurse, if you actually are, which will override the sense of rejection.

TiffyRN, BSN, PhD · Sep 11, 2016

There's a great set of recommendations from the National Council of the State Boards of Nursing (NCSBN) on the use of social media, including discouraging online social media contact. That can give you a reasonable "out" if a patient asks you. Explain that your professional organizations are against such contact. Most people are more understanding if you are not personally rejecting them because the decision is essentially out of your hands.

https://www.ncsbn.org/Social_Media.pdf

But then they may say. . . But my night/day/evening nurse Leslie friended me. . . That complicates things, when there is inconsistency.

martymoose, BSN, RN · Sep 12, 2016

I guess you could always "white lie" and say , sorry, I dont have an account. Many of the people I work with really dont real with social media.

bossman · Sep 12, 2016

I stick to "no". Why not? "because I said no."

brillohead, ADN, RN · Sep 12, 2016

I also go with the fact that it's against company policy to combine personal and professional contacts.

When confronted with, "well my other nurse did it!" my response is that *I* am not comfortable risking my job, but other coworkers might not be as concerned about getting fired.

I always make it about the company/professional boundaries situation, never about the fact that I really wouldn't want to friend the person even if it were permissible!

AutumnApple · Sep 12, 2016

My way of dealing with it slams home the point that I am their nurse and I don't venture outside the therapeutic relation.

"Sorry, I reserve that for family and friends of family only."

May seem harsh or cold but I find dancing around the question leads to more hurt feelings than being blunt does.

Reason for that is: If I leave the door open for interpretation, they inevitably think I do "friend" patients, just not them.

Also, I currently work home health. I've noticed a pattern where family members will try to grease me up with friendliness then tell me they are doing something inappropriate (like putting the pt to sleep with extra sleeping pills when they won't listen).

Now, if I fall for the faked friendship and let things leave the boundaries of a therapeutic relation, it's harder to redirect and report such things.

On the other hand, if I've maintained a therapeutic relation, they know I am "one of those nurses" who won't pretend not to see such things.

Editorial Team / Moderator · Sep 12, 2016

I had a pt who was a frequent flyer with MR, and I had a friend request from him on Facebook some years ago. I declined, and the next time he came in I told him that I was could only be his nurse, not his Facebook friend. He was a sweet guy, he said he was sad but understood. I always ended up with that guy in my rooms! Lol

Farawyn · Sep 12, 2016

I say No. There is no Nice about it. I'm not their friend.

Buyer beware, BSN · Sep 12, 2016

I had a pt who was a frequent flyer with MR, and I had a friend request from him on Facebook some years ago. I declined, and the next time he came in I told him that I was could only be his nurse, not his Facebook friend. He was a sweet guy, he said he was sad but understood. I always ended up with that guy in my rooms! Lol

Yes. I think this request says a lot about the inherent quasi personal relationships that nurses and some others can de facto but inadvertently create with some patients and vice versa.

Much to our credit and societal preconditioning, many patients imprint on us, like ducklings to their mother, qualities that may or may not be justified given the lopsided relationship of caregiver to patient.

So if a patient wants to be your friend just throw them a curveball and say," for now, let's just get you better." As far as agonizing over putting the kibosh on the request, c'mon ladies, y'all rule the game of fastpitch.