Hi everyone! I'm a new nurse and I had a really bad day a bit ago with a patient who I had to call our rapid response team for and he ended up in the ICU (I have no idea other than that, HIPAA and all) and a small part of me wants to know how he is doing. He was young and I felt helpless when I couldn't fix the oxygenation issue that was going on at that time (O2 sats dropping despite increasing oxygen to 6 liters-the only method we have on our floor is nasal cannula unless respiratory brings it). I hugged his mother as they left the floor and that's the last I heard about him.
I've done everything I can think of to leave it at work but it still nags at me occasionally that I want to know how he's doing. Logically, I know that it's honestly none of my business, I'm there for my shift to take care of my patients and go home and return on my next scheduled shift to do the same. I have no desire to call and find out or do any of the creepy things I've read/heard about nurses doing (showing up to the room to check in on my days off, calling, sending flowers, etc.). I honestly just have a curiosity that I know can't ever be satisfied and I think it's because he was the first patient who left the floor on my shift to go to a higher level of care. I've had fleeting thoughts of other patients, too, who have touched me in some way, whether it be how sweet they were to me or how kind their family was.
I just need to know: what kind of methods do you use to leave it at work? I know this is one of the (I'm sure many) places I need to improve.
On the drive home I call my husband and he let's me vent. I can say whatever I want about work but the moment I hit the door, I don't talk about work anymore. I try not to think about work. The only times that hasn't happened is when it was something particularly hard (usually the loss of one of our kids or if I was in a code/rapid response). If he isn't available, I talk out loud to myself like I'm a crazy lady! Lol same rule when I get home though.
Sometimes I do have to remind myself a few things. Yes this is a JOB! I am only human. I can only do so much. I not perfect and sometimes things are just out of my control and there is nothing I can do.
I have followed up on many patients in order to continue learning.Your curiosity to learn the outcome is not wrong... if it's a teaching tool. If it's for emotional reasons... you need to learn the difference.
I have followed up on many patients in order to continue learning.Your curiosity to learn the outcome is not wrong... if it's a teaching tool. If it's for emotional reasons... you need to learn the difference.
I think it's a bit of both if that makes sense. Not emotions as in having feelings for the patient or anything weird like that, but more of my guilty feeling that I had done something wrong or missed a critical element that could have effected the outcome. Thank you for pointing that out though, it's a really good point that I need to reflect on and make sure that I do keep them separate.
I appreciate everyone's advice, it's been really helpful and I'm feeling even more ready to face the next day. I'm off of orientation next week and it's scary, but it's also nice to know that I not only have my coworkers to lean on when I need a hand, but I can also come here for advice after the fact and get an honest opinion of what I could do better or what I did do right. I rely on constructive criticism to improve, and while this isn't point of impact, it's definitely helpful to reflect on what happened. So thank you all again, I truly appreciate it!
Relax! You are a human being and a woman and you did not leave those qualities behind when you entered the Nursing profession. I worked as an RN on psychiatric units for 20 years and always was concerned about my patients after they left the hospital but not so much that I tried to contact them, which is illegal in the state I worked in. You will grow harder with experience and not worry about patients after they leave your unit but that only comes with time. You will also develop a "clinical eye" so that when interacting with your patients you will see your patients as "part of the job", and that is good but always remember that they are people too.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
There is a church on my drive home. If I have one of those days and it's eating at me I drop the problem off at the church. (Mind you I'm not religious it could be a hotel or a restaurant ). Sometimes that problem runs after me and I have to drop it off again at the park a mile further down the road. Nearly always by the time I get home it is no longer with me. If I feel the need I can pick it back up at the church on my next work day.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
(My bold) I think that's exactly what happened here. I felt guilty that there wasn't more I could do. I assessed him when I got there in the morning and he was stable. Normal temp, bp a bit high but it'd been running high, same with hr. He said he was feeling better than the day before and he had some crackles but I attributed that to the fact he was in for pneumonia. Then suddenly, his mom was asking me to come in and check on him because something didn't seem right so I went in there and it was like all hell had broken loose. I felt like I must have missed something and felt so unprepared and overwhelmed. I asked the CNA to get another nurse while I called the rapid response team and was told I'd done the right thing but I can't help but feel like I missed something, some clue that his condition would change.
It's a typical nurse thing to feel guilty and second-guess yourself. I'm terrible with that. I really liked the advice from the "just a job" people; they've figured out how to be great nurses without turning themselves inside out.
You probably didn't miss anything in your assessment. Sometimes things go abruptly pear-shaped and all you can do is what you can do. Give yourself a pat on the back for your prompt intervention.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
lol @ ivy league words. That's funny. This is a very interesting group with very interesting views.
In case anyone was interested how I came to this particular thread let me explain. There is an email that is sent out to anyone on the website's mailing list. Emotional health in nursing happens to be one of my primary research areas right now. The topic the OP posted and this link was one of the headliners of the email. I hit the link and was quite astonished at some of the things I was reading in what I believed was a professional site. Clearly the anonymous aspect of this site lends some unprofessional behavior but still am a little curious about some of the discussions.
Please feel free to take whatever I say that makes sense for you and discard the rest. I'm not a fan of some of the behavior here so please understand I won't be responding to all remarks.
I will be sticking around and learning a little more about what happens on these sites. The profession of nursing happens to be very near and dear to my heart.
Take care and thank you all for your investment in this conversation. It is very interesting to hear everyone's point of view, whether I agree or not. I'm learning quite a bit. So, thanks.
I'm glad you're learning from this. Your post comes across as smug and sanctimonious. Also a full-scale attack on your targets. Quoting academic material as validation for your behaviour doesn't impress many of the astute old-guard on this site.
In my experience (3+ decades), the people who make the biggest noise about being "non-judgmental" are usually the most judgmental. The ones who quickly cry "bully" have no qualms about viciously attacking others. The people who have been the most aggressively piled-on on this thread have consistently been the ones giving the most thoughtful and measured advice on numerous threads. This site is beset by new people who are eager to demonstrate their moral superiority. It gets old.
I love this site. I have learned a lot from nurses and non-nurses of all stripes. But sanctimony does not play well here.
oh my goodness the OP was seeking advice and yall started attacking each other. people handle the stress of this job very differently some put up a wall and view it as just a job probably because they work in a very high stress environment and wold not be able to deal with it otherwise.....very understandable does not mean she doesn't care or is a bad nurse just doesn't get overly emotionally involved. I am a new grad RN and I hope that one day I will be able to develop a thicker skin and not get so emotionally involved because it only causes burn out. We are human and can only handle but so much stress and loss you have to learn how to protect yourself in this profession.
Red Kryptonite
2,212 Posts
I believe the term you're seeking is "cranio-rectal inversion."