Hi everyone! I'm a new nurse and I had a really bad day a bit ago with a patient who I had to call our rapid response team for and he ended up in the ICU (I have no idea other than that, HIPAA and all) and a small part of me wants to know how he is doing. He was young and I felt helpless when I couldn't fix the oxygenation issue that was going on at that time (O2 sats dropping despite increasing oxygen to 6 liters-the only method we have on our floor is nasal cannula unless respiratory brings it). I hugged his mother as they left the floor and that's the last I heard about him.
I've done everything I can think of to leave it at work but it still nags at me occasionally that I want to know how he's doing. Logically, I know that it's honestly none of my business, I'm there for my shift to take care of my patients and go home and return on my next scheduled shift to do the same. I have no desire to call and find out or do any of the creepy things I've read/heard about nurses doing (showing up to the room to check in on my days off, calling, sending flowers, etc.). I honestly just have a curiosity that I know can't ever be satisfied and I think it's because he was the first patient who left the floor on my shift to go to a higher level of care. I've had fleeting thoughts of other patients, too, who have touched me in some way, whether it be how sweet they were to me or how kind their family was.
I just need to know: what kind of methods do you use to leave it at work? I know this is one of the (I'm sure many) places I need to improve.
Some of the comments on this thread are very derogatory and border on bullying by humiliation, people.
If nursing, no matter your sub-specialty, is just a job, you are in the wrong job.
This is a profession that requires intelligence, skill and empathy. Please keep all 3 buckets active in all your interactions with your patients and their families.
Now, for all of you who are sure I'm a new nurse, sorry to disappoint, 35 yrs at the bedside, 3 in Critical care and 32 in the ED. How many of you would choose this compassionate, empathetic nurse to care for your family or friends as opposed to the ultra "keep you alive" it's only a job nurse. I for one would rather a nurse who cares about me as well as for me if I am a patient. The advanced skills will come with good supportive mentors. Can we please stop attacking whenever we smell blood in the water ( Eating their young sound familiar?). I have been afraid of this very impact on nursing since it has become a lucrative financial profession. That people would go into nursing just for the money and not the rewards inherent in helping and caring for our fellow human beings.
Beccalyn175, each nurse is very different from one another. However, for those of us who have a heart, compassion and care for each human even after we clock out, that is what a debriefing is for. Do they not have those for you at your facility? It is very helpful to prevent nurses from burning out, carrying guilt, and turning into robots without feelings. If your workplace does not have a debriefing request system, ask about them starting one up. This is beneficial for all nurses, new or old - to help review what led up to an event, what was done correctly, what steps could be done differently (nasal cannulas are not enough during a code situation on any floor), and how can policies or procedures be improved. The house supervisor can also ascertain an update on the patient without releasing the patients' names, ie. "Patient A recently had to be transferred from here to ____ and this is a basic review and update." Nurses can choose to attend or not to attend. There should be no punitive actions taken but rather, a non-accusatory conversation with the goal of lessening any negative feelings or blame, and to ensure the best possible procedures in place if the situation comes up again. I hope this helps and that you can get the debriefing system in place at your facility ♥
Specializes in Infection Prevention, Public Health.
Beccalyn, I think your curiosity about what happened to your patient is really commendable. I've learned a lot over the years by feeding my professional curiosity. Talk to your nurse manager, I do not think it is a HIPPA violation if a member of this patient's health care team (you) are interested in how the transition to a higher level of care went. The patient may well be coming back to your unit.
The admitting H&P at the ICU would offer great info as well as the ICU nurses' narrative notes. Again, ask your manager first. Sometimes it helps to close the loop if you have some awareness of what happens at different levels of care. Plus you will really hone your clinical knowledge. I am assuming an electronic health care records are in use.
That said, NOTHING will get you in trouble faster than accessing a patient record without a valid reason for doing so. That is why you need to ask your manager about this.
i very much agree that a good 30 minutes minimum of commuting time to and from work is a great way to make the transition from work to home. Crank up the music!
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I wouldn't say it's "just a job". It's a job where you are taking care of others and they depend on you to do just that. If you think of it as " just a job", how can you be compassionate and caring for your patients? I think it's absolutely normal for you to feel this way. I think it would be unhuman if you didn't. Why do we get in this profession in the first place? Because we have a passion for other people and we have a caring nature! It's never "just a job" to me.
Oh good lord. Nursing as a "calling."
Honestly, in this century, it's just a job. Why DO we get into this profession in the first place? Because of a steady paycheck, indoor work and good benefits. It has been argued by many on this forum that I have neither a caring nature nor a passion for other people. (Let it be noted that none of those people actually KNOW me.)
It's really non of your business why I -- or any of the previous posters -- got into this profession. My reason is as good as yours or anyone else's. Their reason is as good as either of ours.
Yes, you're taking care of others while you're at work. But you aren't taking them home with you, and if you want to be mentally healthy and survive in the profession, you aren't taking their problems home with you, either. At least, not most of the time.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Okay and so what. You're using my time of being a new nurse to try and make your point. When I know great nurses with my mentality. Again, I feel sorry for those under your care.
First, you actually LIED about how long you'd been a nurse when you said, "No, not less than six months."
Second, you don't know anything about Dranger or the care provided. You don't know anything about any of us.
And third, you'll learn. Please revisit this thread in about five years.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Wow-I just realized Superwhatever totally hijacked the thread.
Turning the focus back to OP where it belongs, you don't ever want to lose your compassion. But, you don't want it to dominate your life, or you won't be able to function. From what you have said, I think you already figured this out.
I've always found laughter helps me decompress. It is very therapeutic, and whether it's a TV show (Night Court literally makes me laugh so hard I cry. Certain Big Bang Theory episodes do, too), a movie or a book, if it makes you laugh, you release endorphins. And that can help you get on top of your emotions.
Good luck-we all go through this, especially in the beginning, and sometimes later in our careers as well. Talking about it with other nurses helps.
Laughing is good -- You tube and old episodes of "America's Funniest Home Videos" do it for me. My commute is about 45 minutes and I blast my music all the way home. When I get home, my retired spouse is sitting on the front stoop waiting for me, and after I've told him all about my night and laughed about the funnier aspects of my patients' or their family members' craziness, I'm usually decompressed. If not, the dog gets a nice, long walk. (One memorable night, I walked so long and so fast that I wore out the dog's pads and had to call my husband to come pick us up. Fortunately, those nights are few and far between.) Journalling helps, too. I'm gonna write a book one day based on my journal entries.
I would caution against getting in the habit of using alcohol to decompress. It's not a good long-term strategy. A hot bubble bath and hot chocolate are good, though.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I'm not. It's kind of upsetting, however, when someone comes at you that "blunt", especially if you are newer. I will most assuredly listen to those that don't talk down to me. I understand I'm newer, and that definitely doesn't make me superior, but that also doesn't make me inferior.
Being new doesn't make you an inferior PERSON, but it does make you an inferior NURSE. Or do you think you have nothing to learn from the experienced nurses with whom you work?
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I think I have been misunderstood in my getting heated up over something, I apologize. I didn't intend to "hijack" this thread. What I was intending to say from the start and it did get out of hand was... I believe compassion and empathy should always be there. And that I feel it is normal to feel this way. BUT I did not mean to let it dominate you and allow yourself to bring it home with you. I was simply confirming that what you feel is normal and I've felt it before, as some of my friends have. I do believe it is important to find an escape. Something that you enjoy to "decompress". I apologize that it seemed as if I was saying to continue to feel like that and bring it home with you, I can see where I might have been misunderstood.
You haven't been misunderstood. WE got it the first time.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
There is a church on my drive home. If I have one of those days and it's eating at me I drop the problem off at the church. (Mind you I'm not religious it could be a hotel or a restaurant ). Sometimes that problem runs after me and I have to drop it off again at the park a mile further down the road. Nearly always by the time I get home it is no longer with me. If I feel the need I can pick it back up at the church on my next work day.
Specializes in Infection Prevention, Public Health.
These new nurses are learners and professionals. Brand spanking new, but our colleagues none-the-less. The thread got off to a rocky start. New nurses can be unreasonably idealistic and experienced nurses can be part of the "we've always done it that way" mind set. After 33 years of nursing, I am still learning and that is what keeps me going. Though it does feel pretty cool to have been doing this long enough that I have a few tricks up my sleeve
ED RN 4ever
1 Post
Some of the comments on this thread are very derogatory and border on bullying by humiliation, people.
If nursing, no matter your sub-specialty, is just a job, you are in the wrong job.
This is a profession that requires intelligence, skill and empathy. Please keep all 3 buckets active in all your interactions with your patients and their families.
Now, for all of you who are sure I'm a new nurse, sorry to disappoint, 35 yrs at the bedside, 3 in Critical care and 32 in the ED. How many of you would choose this compassionate, empathetic nurse to care for your family or friends as opposed to the ultra "keep you alive" it's only a job nurse. I for one would rather a nurse who cares about me as well as for me if I am a patient. The advanced skills will come with good supportive mentors. Can we please stop attacking whenever we smell blood in the water ( Eating their young sound familiar?). I have been afraid of this very impact on nursing since it has become a lucrative financial profession. That people would go into nursing just for the money and not the rewards inherent in helping and caring for our fellow human beings.