Hi everyone! I'm a new nurse and I had a really bad day a bit ago with a patient who I had to call our rapid response team for and he ended up in the ICU (I have no idea other than that, HIPAA and all) and a small part of me wants to know how he is doing. He was young and I felt helpless when I couldn't fix the oxygenation issue that was going on at that time (O2 sats dropping despite increasing oxygen to 6 liters-the only method we have on our floor is nasal cannula unless respiratory brings it). I hugged his mother as they left the floor and that's the last I heard about him.
I've done everything I can think of to leave it at work but it still nags at me occasionally that I want to know how he's doing. Logically, I know that it's honestly none of my business, I'm there for my shift to take care of my patients and go home and return on my next scheduled shift to do the same. I have no desire to call and find out or do any of the creepy things I've read/heard about nurses doing (showing up to the room to check in on my days off, calling, sending flowers, etc.). I honestly just have a curiosity that I know can't ever be satisfied and I think it's because he was the first patient who left the floor on my shift to go to a higher level of care. I've had fleeting thoughts of other patients, too, who have touched me in some way, whether it be how sweet they were to me or how kind their family was.
I just need to know: what kind of methods do you use to leave it at work? I know this is one of the (I'm sure many) places I need to improve.
Izzydame, I understand that you love yourself a bunch and have a powerful need to show off your writing skills, but would you please start your own posts and stop hijacking this one? I feel that you are a distraction to the topic at hand and I think we would all appreciate you more if you were showcased in a more appropriate venue.
Thank you.
Canigraduate, I can't begin to tell you how angry your post made me. Really?? It would have been fine had you just written "I think we would all appreciate..." Why was it necessary to be snarky?? I just don't understand why it is so important to be nasty...why is it so hard to treat people as you would like to be treated?
I read your thread about ADHD and would be happy to offer you some solid advice if you want to PM me. It is an area that I have quite of bit of successful expertise.
I look forward to a private discussion if that is to be. Otherwise, I wish you the best in your nursing career.
Thank you for your input in my writing. I'm assuming you think I have some writing skills
I dabble in writing, it is one of my hobbies ... lol ...
Be sure that I have no plans to continue to take center stage. I said what I needed to say and feel pretty comfortable with it.
Enjoy your fourth of july. Independence day. Assuming you are from the states ...
*big hugs* to you ... your heart is beautiful and just thinking there are nurses out there ... people out there ... with hearts as caring as yours, truly ... and I mean, truly, makes me happy.
I come on strong sometimes, backlash is part of coming on strong. Nurses know that sometimes backlash is part of the job. I don't necessarily like backlash ... or urine, or vomit, or sleepless nights, or labs that don't show any hint of what is wrong, or patients who touch our hearts and suffer while we are powerless to help the way we want, or anything unpleasant ... but I do know that it is part of the profession I chose. Nursing is my passion, my heart. Sometimes that hurts. And, sometimes, that is okay.
Healing is the focus. I will always focus on that. Healing.
Thank you, tinyonern, for being the type of person that inspires me to get back up and do it again. We all need that person who inspires us, and I imagine that you are that person for a lot of people.
I must say something, as much as I was trying to stay out of this. But, the super person, or whatever the screen name is now, was getting hits at for hijacking the thread, apologized and tried to get off the thread and said that the attention should go back on the OP (which, no, it didn't have to be hijacked in the first place, especially the level that it went...but at least she tried to direct it back)..and then after she got off the thread and said that attention needs to go back on the OP...people continued to quote things both she and Dranger said and keep focus away from the OP. Which is still happening. I think this thread needs to be closed because it definitely has derailed one too many times, and not for any right reasons.
Back to the topic at hand.....I find having a regular routine (using some of the ideas posted here) really helped me. Earlier in my career, I would come home and slump into the couch and nosh on some food and just ruminate about the shoulda/coulda/woulda of my shift. Totally painful! I would convince myself that I wasn't enough....good enough, smart enough....and then I would fall asleep in that mind set.
Now, I come home and my family knows that I need 15 minutes alone in the bathroom. IF something is really bugging me about work, I will put a note on my iPhone, kind of like putting it away in there but retrievable, you know? I shower with good smelling stuff, get into my lounge wear, moisturize my face, and then go eat with my family.
Just the act of "putting it away" and doing a routine helps me disengage so that I can recharge better. I also have found that sometimes when I have gone back to look at a note, a new perspective pops up or I get a new idea about how to approach a situation.
I think we as nurses have all had these moments. I work in hospice, and I often find myself how the family of a patient is doing after the patient has passed away.
We as nurses give so much to so many that we sometimes forget to take care of ourselves. Then we burn out from compassion fatigue because of it. I joined a gym to help me "work out" the stress in my day. When I can't get to the gym because of my husband's schedule, I grab my kids and play kick ball in the backyard until I have to make dinner (hearing those giggles lightens my heart!)
Find something that redirects your focus, whatever that may be. And make sure you take care of YOU. If you get to the point where you are losing sleep or losing interest in things you enjoy because you can't get a patient or situation off your mind, talk to a professional (I know that sounds generic, but true!). You worked hard to become a nurse. Don't let the stress of the job take that away from you.
I would be happy to have Danger as my nurse. To be able to separate this job from home life is not easy. Nurses with more experience tend to do a better job of it. Emotions are less likely to cloud good judgment. Would you rather be cared for by someone who is knowledgeable and experienced, or someone who is sweet and caring, but doesn't know what they are doing?
tinyonern
46 Posts
Canigraduate, I can't begin to tell you how angry your post made me. Really?? It would have been fine had you just written "I think we would all appreciate..." Why was it necessary to be snarky?? I just don't understand why it is so important to be nasty...why is it so hard to treat people as you would like to be treated?