How Do You Manage Graveyard Shift & Family?

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Hi all. I'm a pre-nursing student with a shift/family question. I hear about the shifts hospital nurses work (usually 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. or 7 p.m. to 7 a.m.) My first choice would be to work days, but what if I get stuck working graveyard? I'm sure there are plenty of nurses out there who have a husband who works during the day and kids and also work 7 p.m.-7 a.m. but I'm wondering how do they manage...especially with kids who are school age? I'm married with two kids, 10 and 4.

I'm also hoping my husband will find another job where he works days every day, and will not have to work nights before I become a nurse. (Trying to avoid hiring a sitter.)

So, graveyard moms, how do you do it? Do your kids ride the bus to/from school? Do you go to bed right after work, and make sure you're awake by the time the kids come home? Or do you sleep until its time to make dinner, eat, then leave for work? How do your husbands feel about it? (I don't think mine will like it.) Do you still get to spend time with your families? Sorry for all the dumb questions, but I've never worked nights before and I want my family to be prepared if this happens. Maybe I'm worried for nothing and it's not all that bad. I would appreciate your take on this!

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Specializes in ICU/ER.

I am a mom of 4 busy kids and I work 3rds by choice. I feel I actually get more time with my family by working 3rd shift./ I work every Sat/Sun and Weds night, by having a set sched helps...

I make it home in time to take the little ones to school I usually txt my husband about 6:45a and let him know if I will make it out on time or if he needs to take them..

I feel the advantages of working 3rds are huge when it comes to being a mom. I can go on field trips with the kids, today i spent the 1st half of the morning in the KDG class room doing groups. If I have a sick one at home I am here, I may be sleeping, but I am here.

I can sleep great during the day when I am the only one home, I will sleep from 9am till about 2 on Mondays and Thursdays, and since the way my sched is set up, I wont need to go back in those nights if I have to be somewhere else and not sleep during the day it is OK.

Until my youngest is at least a 5th or 6th grader I wont even think about working days. How could I run them to and from practice, or greet them when they get off the bus if I was at work....I leave about 6:30pm, we are able to eat dinner as a family and still get home work in before I leave at night...

I think you will like working nights....

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Thanks, racing-mom4. It sounds like it's working for you, and I hope it will work for me too. As long as I can get at least 7 hours of sleep, I should be fine. But I was reading some other threads about working graveyard shift, and I read one post that said if you're the kind of person who has to get a certain amount of hours of sleep, then graveyard shift is NOT for you. Well, I'll see when I get there.:wink2:

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Specializes in ED, ICU, MS/MT, PCU, CM, House Sup, Frontline mgr.

it is possible to work days, but in my local hospital all new grads (which is what you are when you graduate) work nights. it is mandatory for numerous reasons i won't post.

on the other hand, i know of some new grads who work days because they do not work in the hospital setting. like you they set out as a pre-nursing student with a family hoping for day shift... but after nursing school they were unable to be hired on days. however, the ones i know that work outside of the hospital are happy. they found another specialty to work in that is (to them) more family friendly and has become their new passion.

so who knows? you may not become a hospital nurse after nursing school. thus, i suggest you not worry about shifts etc. right now. you have a long way to go and many things can happen between now and the time you graduate including your family situation. gl!

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Specializes in ICU, Cardiac.

I have been working nights for 15 years. It is much easier now that my kids are in school all day.

My routine:

Work 7pm - 7:30am - Get home around 8am and see the kids for about 10 minutes before the bus comes. DH gets them up and getting ready for school, makes sure they eat breakfast, packs their lunches etc.

I am normally sleeping by 8:30 and I get up at 2:45pm to get ready for the kids to come home. We do homework, hang out for a bit and then they are ready to play with friends.

Supper gets started at about 5pm and we sit down to eat about 5:45ish. Thankfully, I live close to my employer and it only takes 10 minutes or so to get to work so I don't leave till about 6:30 - 6:45pm.

I work three in a row to maintain my sleeping pattern and life patterns!!!!

Nights is great......if I worked days, I wouldn't get home until 8pm and would only see the kids for a short period and would miss dinner with the family three nights a week.....

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Hi, Dottie....LOTS of moms choose to work the 7p-7a hours because most of the time they're at work, their kids are sleeping. And it leaves four days a week when we're NOT working, plus can attend events our daytime-working pals cannot.

We learn to juggle sleep, that's true. I'm usually pretty tired, but I'm also happy to have more time with my kids while I work these hours.

**As an FYI note? PLEASE don't say "graveyard" to a hospital nurse--we NEVER use that term! :) We work nights.....we work nocs.....never "graveyard" ;)

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Specializes in Medsurg/ICU, Mental Health, Home Health.

i couldn't do it, i don't think. i'm not married or a mother, and i did 7p-7a only because i knew that i would be able to schedule eight hours straight for sleep. i tried to sleep 9a-5p before i worked. if i had to get up a few hours before 5p i would be a wreck (perhaps literally). to me, it would be like working 7a-7p and then getting up at 3a! uh, no way!

i think mothers, however, are completely different. they can run on love, i guess. so i do think you could physically do it, and you can see that lots of people make it work.

i wish you the best!

jess

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Specializes in LTC, Med-SURG,STICU.

I am not working nights at this time, but I did while I was in school. I found that it was a lot easier on my family when I worked 12 shifts on nights rather than 12 hour shifts on days. When I worked days I did not get home in time to eat supper with the family and most of the time I did not get home until close to thier bed time. When I worked nights I would get home in time to get them on the school bus. Then I would go to bed and sleep until until 3 pm. I would get showered and start supper while they did thier homework. Then we would eat super and the kids would get their baths. By that time, I would leave for work. Personally, I found three nights in a row worked the best, if it worked out with my classes/clinicals. Now I work 8 hour day shift and I hate it. I am at work all the time.

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Hi there,

I just started nights in August. It takes some adjusting. Unlike the others that posted, I feel that all I do is sleep. I feel I spend less time with my kids and have no energy to do the things I did when I worked days. I hope this just takes some adjusting. Let me tell...there is so much less BULL CRAP and Drama on this shift and everyone works well together!

P.S. I work 7p-7am on Tues and Thurs and 11p-7a on Fridays. So 32 hours. I also have two small sons 3.5 years old and 2!

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i am working nights and let me tell you, it sucks. i'm so wiped about for about 48 hours after the shift. it totally toys with your natural sleeping pattern. people say you must keep up the sleeping pattern outside of work, but who in the heck sleeps all day and stays up at night? business and people don't work that way. my social life suffers because i'm so groggy on my days off all i want to do is sleep. i'm going to switch to days soon! HOWEVER, despite all of this, there are some big positives about night shift: more pay, pts are hopefully sleeping so you have more down time, less admission, no doctors to deal with, no family to deal with.

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Specializes in Psychiatric.

When I worked in the hospital I LOVED the 3rd shift...I have a husband and a 12 year-old niece living with me...I went to work at 10:30 p.m., after they had already gone to bed...got off work at 7:15 a.m. and made it home before they left the house...she rode the bus so I got to see her off to school and my hubby off to the base. I then went to bed and slept VERY well by darkening the room and keeping it cold and quiet, between 8:30 and 2:30...then I got up before everybody got home and was able to spend time with them...

On my days off I kept that schedule up except on weekends, where I'd stay up for one whole day...we worked out chores too so it worked out for us...I would happily go back to that shift! It's doable for sure.

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i am working nights and let me tell you, it sucks. i'm so wiped about for about 48 hours after the shift. it totally toys with your natural sleeping pattern. people say you must keep up the sleeping pattern outside of work, but who in the heck sleeps all day and stays up at night? business and people don't work that way. my social life suffers because i'm so groggy on my days off all i want to do is sleep.

Ugh, and I thought it was just me. I do 6:30p-6:30a and while I absolutely love working nights, I haven't went out in months. I am cured of my OCD - I was anal about cleaning but now barely muster the energy to load the dishwasher. My spice rack is no longer alphabetized.

I'll make dr appts for late in the day then cancel at the last minute because I just don't have the energy to get up, shower, and drive.

I've always been more of a night person, naturally falling asleep at 4am and getting up at noon but somehow this is different. For the most part, aside from an early morning class, I keep my sleep pattern the same throughout the week. Last weekend was an exception. My two nieces and I fell asleep in my bed at 9p and didn't wake up until 7a. I don't recall the last time I woke up and didn't feel tired.

I don't know how mothers (or fathers) work outside the home and still be there to take their kids to practice, make meals, etc. I guess it's love.

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