As I came out of Circuit City yesterday afternoon, there were cops, fire dept and paramedics all over the place. An officer came up asking if I owned a Ford sedan, I told him no, and showed him the truck I drive. Looking towards a fast-food place, I saw emergency people holding and examining a toddler no more than 1 1/2 years old. You could tell the child was in severe distress, the paramedics were cracking and applying cold packs to get her temp down. She looked alert, and responding.
Yep, another stupid adult leaving a child in a locked car in the middle of the afternoon. The temp outside was 100. This is the first time I've ever witnessed this, and became physically ill. I became so angry, it took me a while to calm down.
It reminds me when I was doing my clinical for my EMT in an emergency room years ago. The mother came in with a baby who was bruised and having trouble breathing. The cops came, and the mother admitted her boyfriend did it. Soon after, the boyfriend came in demanding to see the child. I started after him, and the cops had to restrain me, and get the guy out fast. The cops understood my feelings, but had to keep me down to protect me. I did get some satisfaction when I saw the cops trying to help the guy in the car, and just couldn't seem to get his head down far enough and kept hitting his head trying to get in. :chuckle
I often wonder if leaving your child in a hot car isn't the perfect way to get away with murder. In my opinion that is what it is, and from my knowledge hardly is anyone ever charged. It makes me sick every time I hear about it.
of course, if cars were built so that it was safe to have the kid in the front, were-to me- they belong....this wouldnt be happening
You are correct. I wondered for years if there was a correlation. I recently read a study on the numbers of infants and young children left in vehicles. Prior to the air bag, and the emphasis on putting infants and young children in the back seat, this was a very rare occurrence. It has become much more common since then.
Another problem with putting infants and children in the back seat occurs when the driver turns around to check on them, and becomes involved in a vehicle accident. The police warned people about this some years ago when a woman went left of center, sideswiping one vehicle, and hitting another head on. This woman died.
The law of unintended consequences applies here (Solving one problem may create other problems).
This may be true in your local area, but the stories that I have seen on the news about these tragedies were perpetrated by professional-types. I remember that one was a doctor and another was a business owner, and puggy232 in this thread reported that she heard about this being done by a pediatrician. In these other cases, leaving kids behind to die were NOT limited to low-income or non-educated people.
I purposefully phrased it "tend to," I never said always.
I know of at least one case around here where it wasn't ignorance or laziness that caused this...it was plain ol' human forgetfulness.
I know, I know....how can you forget your child is in the backseat of a car? If you have a quiet child, like mine was, I could easily see it happening. It was the parent (in this case a father) who was not usually the one who took the baby to daycare who got in the car and went to work - forgetting the baby was in the back seat. 8 hours later he comes back and baby is dead.
Doesn't change the outcome, but this father was not lazy nor ignorant.
Just human. So sad.
I remember the case. It was last year, last summer. The mother was an MD, she was running late for work (pediatrician, of all things), and she took the baby to the father, who was to take the child to day care because Mom was running late. The mother claimed she FORGOT to tell the father the baby needed to be dropped off and the father didn't know the baby was even in the car, so great was the rush and miscommunication. The prosecutor declined to press charges against the father, as he did not know the baby was even in the car. She also did not go after Mom, as I guess forgetting is not a crime. I don't know what is the right thing to do about such events. Prosecute? Not prosecute? There was a lot of anger that this couple was not charged, as they were white and a lot of people thought they would have been charged if not for that. The baby was still dead, no matter what race. And the parents must live with that forever. Punishment enough, I think.
I once worked with a woman who probably had adult ADD and was so easily distracted, I honestly believe she could have genuinely forgotten her child(ren) in the car and hope that she was never left alone with her children until they could look after themselves.
She was a very nice woman and highly intelligent, but she did not finish ANYTHING.
Otherwise, I believe that most of these cases are deliberate (they're sick of the baby crying all the time, or the spouse is jealous of it, or whatever) and this is a way to get rid of an unwanted child without people asking too many questions.......as long as you're middle class and white or Asian. If you're black or Hispanic, forget it, you're going to jail for life.
When this happened last summer my dh thought it would be a good idea to put something in the front seat of your car or van to remind you there is a child in the back seat...such as the diaper bag or blankie.
I feel the same way. I have 2 children and they come with me. Even if dad has them throughout the day, I call his cell and ask how they are. Forgetting to stop at Store X is much different than forgetting your infant/child. Not even close to the same thing.
Uh....yeah. Which is why I wrote what I did. The analogy of forgetting to stop at Store X was to illustrate the point of how one's mind wanders, and when someone who rarely has a child in the backseat DOES have their mind on 60 other things, I CAN see the "forgetting" occuring. I never condoned it, just tried to understand how it can occur. The parent who DOES typically have that child in the car would NOT forget. You have your kids with you frequently, so it's a non-issue for you. It is NOT a non-issue for a couple of the sadsacks who have made the news (like the Dad who takes his kid with him once every several months and absolutely DID forget him in the backseat).
It never does any good to just harumph that something is inexcusable. That's so very easy; everyone loves to do it. But it DOES do some good to find a potential cause, and therefore STOP the behavior. Like the person who wondered about the rate of this happening when children have been allowed in the front passenger seat.
And all of this stuff about forgetting they are there is ENTIRELY different from the original post, in which someone DELIBERATELY left the kid in the car. In those cases, it's total ignorance or stupidity, not human tragedy.
I can see forgetting a child, especially if you weren't used to having them in the car. If that ever happened to me I wouldn't give the prosecutor any trouble at all. I can't imagine being able to look anyone in the eye again; I'd be much better off in jail where I wouldn't have to see regular folk again.
Have heard of incidents where parents inadvertently left children in cars like parent who usually did not drop child off at day care forgetting sleeping child was in car. As far as prosecuting that parent, I think we can't punish the parent more than they will punish themselves. Imagine, for a minute, the guilt one would feel. It would be a lifetime of despair.
My mother told of almost leaving her 4th child in the house when the family was going somewhere. How would this happen? I can't explain it but thankfully others were there to remind her. Sometimes there is no one to remind us.
i absolutely agree with the post about being built safer..this would not only prevent an accidental abandonment but it would also give quality time with child-parent
poor little kid so much of time looking a back of parents head
I don't know what is the right thing to do about such events. Prosecute? Not prosecute? There was a lot of anger that this couple was not charged, as they were white and a lot of people thought they would have been charged if not for that. The baby was still dead, no matter what race. And the parents must live with that forever. Punishment enough, I think.
babygirl66733
24 Posts
I often wonder if leaving your child in a hot car isn't the perfect way to get away with murder. In my opinion that is what it is, and from my knowledge hardly is anyone ever charged. It makes me sick every time I hear about it.