Hmm...that's nice

Posted
by DiplomaNurseRN DiplomaNurseRN Member

Specializes in Pushing a rock .... Has 35 years experience.

What are your feelings when a patient or family member pulls the 'nurse card' (current or former nurse) on you when you or a team member is delivering care? I typically found family members the worse, but as long as it didn't interfere with my duties I would achknowledge the fact but pretty much ignored them and just smiled a lot.

dec2007

dec2007

1 Article; 508 Posts

What are your feelings when a patient or family member pulls the 'nurse card' (current or former nurse) on you when you or a team member is delivering care? I typically found family members the worse, but as long as it didn't interfere with my duties I would achknowledge the fact but pretty much ignored them and just smiled a lot.

Over the years I have discovered that most folks that say "I have a relative 'in healthcare' turn out to actually have a relative who works as a dietary aide or custodian in a long term care facility or doctor's office, and for some twisted reason they believe they will receive more attention or better healthcare if they imply that they are "one of us". It is dishonest and manipulative, but sometimes that is human nature too.

cleback

cleback

1,381 Posts

I enjoy talking with my nurse colleagues. Usually when someone says they're a nurse, it sparks a conversation about where they work, how they like it, etc. I don't think it's brought up to criticize the care being given.

WKShadowNP, DNP, APRN

Specializes in Hospital medicine; NP precepting; staff education. Has 21 years experience. 1 Article; 2,077 Posts

It depends on their motivation how I react to it. Sometimes it is their way to inform me they understand my care and instructions and then there's the other end of the spectrum where its intent is to manipulate or question.

If the latter is true I remark how proud they must be and move on, or something like that. For the former I guage their understanding to ensure I don't assume they know everything because their experience and knowledge base likely varies from mine.

Wuzzie

4,812 Posts

When dealing with my parents' health care issues I never offer that I'm a nurse but I'm usually outed by a slip of the tongue (using nurse-speak) or eventually my mom lets the cat out of the bag. Even so I pretty much just stay in the background unless there's an issue and even then I try very hard not to step on toes. I'm my parents' HCPOA so I can discuss things with their providers but I'm very careful to only call when absolutely necessary (like when mom and dad aren't telling the docs the full story or if they misunderstood something and I'm not clear on what they're talking about.) Most of the the providers know I'm a nurse but I have only played the nurse card once when a misogynistic foreign physician, who had already diagnosed and prescribed medications for conditions that my mother did not have, decided to go full-on condescending when he told me there was no such test as a differential on a CBC. This was after receiving CBC results with an obvious pancytopenia. He just could not understand why I was concerned. Helloo...leukemia? Jeez. I fired him on the spot.

Penelope_Pitstop

Penelope_Pitstop, BSN, RN

Has 13 years experience. 2,365 Posts

I did this when my grandmother was dying, but it wasn't to throw around my weight. My mom was the decision maker but elected me to make the decisions on her behalf when my grandmother was in the ICU. When it came time for rounds on the morning we withdrew care, I approached the intensivist and told him I had been a critical care nurse myself (on the unit one floor above) so he and I were able to have a very quick discussion using medical terminology. I, in turn, "translated" for my family. It was less upsetting for everyone involved.

Other than that, I tend not to do this, but I live in a very "smalltown"-ish place so by just showing up, you out yourself!

RNOTODAY, BSN, RN

Specializes in NICU, ER, OR. Has 18 years experience. 1,116 Posts

Personally? I NEVER make a grand announcement that I am an RN, it's just tacky , and not my style whatsoever. However , If, say outside of the hospital and I'm conversing with a doc, they pick it up right away, so then I'll say I am, they just know by the conversation. There's nothing more sad and tacky than one who touts off, at the most random time " I'm a medical assistant " or " I'm a nurse"--- when they are a CNA!! Omg that pisses me OFF...

caliotter3

38,333 Posts

I didn't like the way I was treated when providers knew I was a nurse, so now I go out of my way to keep that information to myself. No real necessity to discuss this.

OrganizedChaos, LVN

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab. Has 10 years experience. 1 Article; 6,883 Posts

When I was last in the hospital I sparked up conversation with the two LVNs caring for me about how I am an LVN as well.

The first LVN I inquired about the bridge program in town & how it worked.

I had always been curious & had no one to ask a personal opinion. The second LVN it kind of just slipped out. He asked me what I did prior to being a mother & I was honest.

Both nurses were really nice about me being a nurse & we had had great conversation. I have yet to come across a nurse who treats me dumb or poorly if it comes out that I am a nurse.

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN

Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia. Has 45 years experience. 7,899 Posts

As the RN who has had this happen, my standard response was "This (meaning PICU) is such a specialized environment that I would never expect you to know the ins-and-outs of this specialty. I would be lost in your specialty as well- so I will just assume you are NOT a professional and give you the same teaching and info I give all my families" I always felt as though this 'allowed' them to ask 'stupid questions' and put them more at ease.

Caveat: some people are just jerks and want to show off, too!

smf0903

844 Posts

It depends. I've taken care of quite a few elderly retired nurses and I love talking to them. As a general rule I find the family members/patients who are/were nurses or doctors are great to have.

I did take take care of a family member of a friend one time and another family member (who just got her M.D. like 2 weeks prior) introduced herself to me as "Hi, I'm Jane, I'm the doctor." I replied with "Nice to meet you. I'm smf0903, I'm the nurse" and kept my eye roll in check :sarcastic:

prmenrs, RN

Specializes in NICU, Infection Control. Has 42 years experience. 4,565 Posts

Funny story, not exactly on point, but... My son had some surgery; he was sleeping, and I was sitting next to him studying for my Neo Resus certification. **I was wearing a 'Mom' outfit--T-shirt and jeans, not scrubs. A surgeon came in to see the other pt in the room, not my son. He looked @ me questioningly, and said the other pt's name. I shook my head and pointed @ my son. He sort of snorted and said, "I don't understand why they put a nurse in the room and only give them one pt! Why don't they give her both??" I said, "I totally understand, Dr. [blank], but in this case, I'm the mother, not the nurse!" "Oh!" he says, and walks out of the room.

I asked the other pt's nurse what he said to her; "Well! She looked like a nurse!!!" "She is, but not @ this hospital!" We joked that I must have "nurse" stamped on my forehead!