I've been working at my current job for almost 3 months. Just a few week off orientation working independently.
Last night I worked with 2 other nurses. One happened to be another new nurse. The nurse that had been there longer had the nastiest attitude I've ever seen. From the moment she saw the assignment posted on the board you could just tell she was upset. I'm not sure why, maybe because she would be working with the two newest nurses? She complained, rolled her eyes, made us feel like she didn't want us to be working with her, made it clear that a certain area was hers, very unhelpful as well. It was completely unprofessional.
I notified the nurse manager. Apparently they are good friends, so that wasn't very helpful with the plan that the two of them had come up with. So I sent an email to someone one step higher than my nurse manager. We'll find out today if anything has changed. Apparently this wasn't the first time that this has been an issue with this nurse. Almost makes me feel like I found the wrong job because of this one employee. Advice? Opinions? Similar situations? Please share, thank you.
Bullies are by no means tolerated. This is lateral violence! If the manager you reported this to does nothing about it then go up the chain of command. Make a big fuss and say you feel threatened. Bullying is not tolerated anymore. You folks here are insane! I have worked in a hospital 18 years and the people that were bullies always ended up out the door. Report them to corporate compliance and if that still doesn't work then they don't deserve a great nurse like you.
No. Just no.
This is not an example of being bullied. This is an example of a brand new nurse who was treated with a less than effusive, thank God you're here now attitude, and she ran crying to mommy. When that didn't get her the reaction she wanted (or expected) she cried to mommy's mommy.
Is the other nurse a *****? Possibly. Maybe she just doesn't have real good people skills. Maybe the elastic in her pantyhose was shot. Whatever, eye rolls and staking out her territory don't constitute bullying.
Honestly, the word has become so overworked and misused, it does disservice to those who actually have suffered at the hands of a bully.
Even though OP has been on the job for 3 months, she still hasn't really begun to learn the culture of the unit as a full fledged member, rather than as an orientee.
She may have shot herself in the foot with her actions. If she's lucky, the other staff will give her a second chance to prove herself.
And that's what she's going to have to do. Prove herself to be a competent nurse and an adult who can work with difficult personalities. You don't have to be friends with co-workers. You do, however, have to earn their trust as the new kid on the block.
Oh, and to answer the question posed in the title? More times than I can remember. Sometimes it worked itself out, sometimes it didn't. What I remember NOT doing was trying to drag management into it.
Now, now folks. Maybe this really did cross the line from being cranky to being a straight-up b___, which is NOT ok. Now, the way OP says she handled this is totally inappropriate, but just sayin'.
Specializes in Palliative, Onc, Med-Surg, Home Hospice.
Be more supportive and a person with a nasty attitude is a bully. Please go somewhere else with that subjective stuff. No one here is assessing a patient!
Let's do a side by side comparison, shall we?
Bullying: Deliberately placing a person into a situation that is designed to make the person fail: Ex: New nurse who has never accessed a port, experienced nurse tells her to go access the port, then reports new nurse to the manager saying 'she is incompetent, she needs to be fired".
Not Bullying: Nurse rolling eyes at the other nurse.
Bullying: Constantly using derogatory words/names to a nurse (or any other employee), typically to cause distress in the recipient. Ex: constantly calling a fellow nurse, tech, etc a *** in front of others. Spreading rumors that said nurse is gay and referring to said nurse as a *** (or whatever word) as a means to harm the nurse emotionally.
Not bullying: rolling your eyes at someone.
Bullying: deliberately physically harming the person. Typically claiming that is was an accident.
Not bullying: rolling your eyes at someone. Being cranky. Just being generally rude.
(The above examples have not happened to me, but I have seen them happen to others.
BTW: Going to the manager with repeated accusations of bullying without evidence as such, so as to cause harm to the "bully" can be construed as bullying. Especially when the alleged bully ends up getting written up, and has to attend lateral violence classes to keep their job. (Again, not me but one of my co-workers.)
Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
I agree with Celtic Goddess. The OP is the one who fits the description of being a bully.
OP, good luck with getting the rest of the staff to feel they can call you a trusted co-worker. A mature way to handle the situation would have been to ask the nurse "Is something wrong? You seem to be upset. Can I help?" Instead, you proved yourself untrustworthy to not just your peers but to your manager, because you went over your manager's head when you weren't happy with the response she gave you. You're also making a bad impression on your boss's boss, which is not something you want to do so early in your career.
Next time you have a situation that requires conflict resolution, take some time to reflect before acting. Knee-jerk responses never get you very far.
I think it was pretty arrogant and downright stupid to complain about your coworker in the first place. Whether she is negative in general or just having a bad shift it really wasn't a smart thing to do. You didn't like her attitude before imagine how she'll be now! Wow! I just don't understand why you would report her in the first place and then turn around and make a complaint with the bosses boss. Talk about really stupid! Brand new employee walks in like she owns the place. Not smart!
As a new employee its your job to prove yourself and get along with everyone, not judge others and try to cause problems. Why should the manager even care what you think when like you said you are new and just off orientation. The only time I would complain about a coworker if it was a serious situation such as a med error, certainly not over a bad attitude.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I've been working at my current job for almost 3 months. Just a few week off orientation working independently.
Last night I worked with 2 other nurses. One happened to be another new nurse. The nurse that had been there longer had the nastiest attitude I've ever seen. From the moment she saw the assignment posted on the board you could just tell she was upset. I'm not sure why, maybe because she would be working with the two newest nurses? She complained, rolled her eyes, made us feel like she didn't want us to be working with her, made it clear that a certain area was hers, very unhelpful as well. It was completely unprofessional.
I notified the nurse manager. Apparently they are good friends, so that wasn't very helpful with the plan that the two of them had come up with. So I sent an email to someone one step higher than my nurse manager. We'll find out today if anything has changed. Apparently this wasn't the first time that this has been an issue with this nurse. Almost makes me feel like I found the wrong job because of this one employee. Advice? Opinions? Similar situations? Please share, thank you.
I wish I thought you were kidding about this, but sadly enough, I believe you actually DID what you said you did. I cannot understand what in the world is wrong with you to make you think that was a good idea, but evidently you haven't yet learned to get along with your colleagues in a professional situation.
Being an adult and having a real job means you have to work with people you don't like, people who don't like you and people who are nasty, miserable people. It happens in all fields, not just nursing. But for some reason, nurses are expected to be neverending fonts of compassion and understanding for all. Bull hockey. Nurses are human, just like lawyers, bus drivers and presidential candidates. What compassion we have goes to our patients first. A nurse who is having a very bad day (or month) may not have much compassion left over for co-workers -- especially special snowflake coworkers who bully them by going to the manager over a perceived slight rather than actually TALK to them about it.
That's right. I said the "B" word. There is a bully in this scenerio as you have described it, and the bully is you.
Why on earth would you "notify the manager" about a situation where you "felt" she didn't want you working with her rather than first sit down and talk to this nurse? (Or better yet, sit down and do a reality check on your perception of the situation.) I can see why she wouldn't want to work with you. And then to go over your manager's head?
My opinion is that you're the bully.
My advice is to figure out how to work with the colleagues you have, because if you act like this every time someone rolls your eyes, you are going to be in perpetual job-hunt mode. You're an adult, presumably. Act like one.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
All of you here are so unsupportive!
Bullies are by no means tolerated. This is lateral violence! If the manager you reported this to does nothing about it then go up the chain of command. Make a big fuss and say you feel threatened. Bullying is not tolerated anymore. You folks here are insane! I have worked in a hospital 18 years and the people that were bullies always ended up out the door. Report them to corporate compliance and if that still doesn't work then they don't deserve a great nurse like you.
It would be nice if everyone who was grown up enough to have finished a nursing program and passed the licensing exam were adult enough to figure out how to work with colleagues that they don't like, who don't like them, or who are difficult. It would be nice, but it hasn't happened yet.
If you think that the bully in the original post was anyone other than the original poster, you need to go back and read the original post again. Please figure it out before you start your first job as a nurse. I don't know what makes you think the OP is a great nurse -- you have no idea what kind of a nurse she is. But the original post makes it clear that she doesn't know how to get along with her colleagues.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Be more supportive and a person with a nasty attitude is a bully. Please go somewhere else with that subjective stuff. No one here is assessing a patient!
The person with the nasty attitude was the original poster. And you. Are you a bully?
Somewhere sometime ago, I wrote in a post that today's work world seems to have a large preponderance of new nurses/students who feel like it's their God-given duty and/or self-appointed responsibility to the world of nursing to run around pointing their fingers and reporting everyone else to higher up management or to HR/Corporate or to the BON.
Like how in the world did nursing ever exist before without these Angels of Indignant Attitude? (am being smarty here)
Just FYI - California is an 'at-will' state. OP may have made too many unhappy with HER actions.
Jensmom7, BSN, RN
1,907 Posts
No. Just no.
This is not an example of being bullied. This is an example of a brand new nurse who was treated with a less than effusive, thank God you're here now attitude, and she ran crying to mommy. When that didn't get her the reaction she wanted (or expected) she cried to mommy's mommy.
Is the other nurse a *****? Possibly. Maybe she just doesn't have real good people skills. Maybe the elastic in her pantyhose was shot. Whatever, eye rolls and staking out her territory don't constitute bullying.
Honestly, the word has become so overworked and misused, it does disservice to those who actually have suffered at the hands of a bully.
Even though OP has been on the job for 3 months, she still hasn't really begun to learn the culture of the unit as a full fledged member, rather than as an orientee.
She may have shot herself in the foot with her actions. If she's lucky, the other staff will give her a second chance to prove herself.
And that's what she's going to have to do. Prove herself to be a competent nurse and an adult who can work with difficult personalities. You don't have to be friends with co-workers. You do, however, have to earn their trust as the new kid on the block.
Oh, and to answer the question posed in the title? More times than I can remember. Sometimes it worked itself out, sometimes it didn't. What I remember NOT doing was trying to drag management into it.