As nurses, it is inevitable that we will likely be required to provide care for patients and/or families who we don't necessarily enjoy interacting with. However, what happens when a certain patient and/or family makes work unbearable? When simply hearing this person's name makes you cringe and a good day (which is rare) means this person's name isn't even brought up, let alone involves an interaction with them?
Have you ever left a job/position because one or more patients was too much to deal with? Have you ever encountered a patient/family who have impacted your life so negatively you question why you went into nursing at all?
I have three families like this at my workplace right now. Fortunately, one patient is there for rehab services, so will hopefully be discharging soon. Unfortunately, the two other patients are long-term care patients, so will be there indefinitely. Both of them are in relatively good health, so it's likely they will be around for awhile. I am okay with the rehab patient, if only because I know he will be gone soon and future interactions with him will soon be nonexistent. The long-term care patients, however, are going to drive me up the wall until they're gone. Same with their families. I used to love long-term care patients, but these two individuals and their families make me feel otherwise. I haven't done an active job search for any positions elsewhere, but the negativity both of these patients have on my work day and quality of life in general has really made me want to look for a job elsewhere. They're not going anywhere any time soon, and I'm not sure if I can tolerate working with them for another year or more. Part of me does not wish to leave a workplace that I enjoyed before they came, and will enjoy after they're gone. Another part of me is tired of putting up with the negativity these individuals bring to the workplace on a daily basis, something I know they will continue to do. I am tired of their grievance forms, of their negative behaviors, of their false accusations and of their attitude that everything is about them. State has come in multiple times to visit our facility because of their complaints; the state inspectors have seen us more times in this one year than they did in all years prior to this year combined, prior to these patients admitting to us. I have a hard time focusing on other patients because these individuals are demanding of so much attention--and then are unsatisfied no matter what you do regardless.
I know that not every day at work will be good, and not every patient will be pleasant. However, I am tired of the negativity these individuals constantly bring to my life, and want to be able to not dread going to work.
Anyone else been in a similar position? Have YOU ever left a job because a patient and/or family member was too much to deal with and/or negatively impacted your quality of life?
Specializes in Psychiatry, Community, Nurse Manager, hospice.
I've never left a job due to a patient. It's always been admin or my coworkers.
I'm completely unfazed by false accusations and other such drama from my patients. I work in psych and I feel like it's just par for the course. But when my coworkers start doing it, I get unhappy. And if my boss or other superiors start doing it, I quit.
One of my favorite charge nurses at the state psych hospital (I did agency for a year there) would say he could handle psych patients all day but he couldn't handle "psych staff." Me too.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
2 hours ago, Davey Do said:
Many Social Workers that I've had the pleasure of working with have more issues than the population they serve.
I've worked with a multitude of social workers in 2 countries. With rare exception, they're messed up.
Silver Bells, when it's time for you to be somewhere else, the Universe will give you successively harder boots up the orifice until you get it. The Families From Hell are just the latest manifestation.
Steady income? Picking bottles would give you the same per hour yield with a lot less stress.
Both problem families are requesting a care conference this week. It's impossible to predict the future, but both of them may discover there is no nurse manager to attend.
No. I haven’t. I did leave the ER because I was so completely fried with the system abuse but then other patients not getting the care they needed. I kept trying to make it work and was miserable. I am now in Pre-Op and PACU and much happier. No one is dead or dying, most patients are a pleasure to take care of and I have had some really enjoyable conversations with them, and I kept paid the same as a critical care nurse. Once I got settled in, I actually learned a lot from anesthesiologists and the surgeons.
I think too many people stay at jobs that they hate when they are miserable. Make a move that’s better for you. Sometimes the grass is greener….
Both problem families are requesting a care conference this week. It's impossible to predict the future, but both of them may discover there is no nurse manager to attend.
Especially the one where a state ombudsman might be present. If it's gotten that far, I have no desire to be present at this meeting or associate with these people any longer
Specializes in Psych, Addictions, SOL (Student of Life).
my answer to your question is no. I have never left a job because of difficult problematic patients or their family members. I simply do not let people get under my skin that way. I also set boundaries, make sure patients and families know the difference between reasonable and unreasonable expectations and how I plan to take the best care posible of the patient.
Seems like lately more and more people are getting under my skin. Not sure why, didn’t always used to be like this.
LOL.
In all seriousness, when you are stretched as thin as you are, with the work hours you are subjecting yourself to, this is exactly what happens. Little petty annoyances, or even more significant annoyances that aren't usually dealbreakers, become impossibly large to shoulder.
Some patients and families will always get under your skin, no matter what. They might even ruin your shift or your day. But you cannot let them hold this level of power over your job satisfaction or your life. Sometimes we need to adjust our boundaries and learn how to best manage our lives, both personal and professional, so that not every negative encounter becomes a verdict on our careers. Other times, we simply need to walk away from a job or employer that prevents us from holding reasonable boundaries in the first place.
FolksBtrippin, BSN, RN
2,322 Posts
I've never left a job due to a patient. It's always been admin or my coworkers.
I'm completely unfazed by false accusations and other such drama from my patients. I work in psych and I feel like it's just par for the course. But when my coworkers start doing it, I get unhappy. And if my boss or other superiors start doing it, I quit.
One of my favorite charge nurses at the state psych hospital (I did agency for a year there) would say he could handle psych patients all day but he couldn't handle "psych staff." Me too.