Have you ever left a nursing job due to a patient/family member?

Nurses General Nursing

Updated:   Published

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As nurses, it is inevitable that we will likely be required to provide care for patients and/or families who we don't necessarily enjoy interacting with.  However, what happens when a certain patient and/or family makes work unbearable? When simply hearing this person's name makes you cringe and a good day (which is rare) means this person's name isn't even brought up, let alone involves an interaction with them?

Have you ever left a job/position because one or more patients was too much to deal with? Have you ever encountered a patient/family who have impacted your life so negatively you question why you went into nursing at all? 

I have three families like this at my workplace right now.  Fortunately, one patient is there for rehab services, so will hopefully be discharging soon.  Unfortunately, the two other patients are long-term care patients, so will be there indefinitely.  Both of them are in relatively good health, so it's likely they will be around for awhile.  I am okay with the rehab patient, if only because I know he will be gone soon and future interactions with him will soon be nonexistent.  The long-term care patients, however, are going to drive me up the wall until they're gone.   Same with their families.   I used to love long-term care patients, but these two individuals and their families make me feel otherwise.  I haven't done an active job search for any positions elsewhere, but the negativity both of these patients have on my work day and quality of life in general has really made me want to look for a job elsewhere.  They're not going anywhere any time soon, and I'm not sure if I can tolerate working with them for another year or more.   Part of me does not wish to leave a workplace that I enjoyed before they came, and will enjoy after they're gone.  Another part of me is tired of putting up with the negativity these individuals bring to the workplace on a daily basis, something I know they will continue to do.   I am tired of their grievance forms, of their negative behaviors, of their false accusations and of their attitude that everything is about them.  State has come in multiple times to visit our facility because of their complaints; the state inspectors have seen us more times in this one year than they did in all years prior to this year combined, prior to these patients admitting to us. I have a hard time focusing on other patients because these individuals are demanding of so much attention--and then are unsatisfied no matter what you do regardless.  

I know that not every day at work will be good, and not every patient will be pleasant.  However, I am tired of the negativity these individuals constantly bring to my life, and want to be able to not dread going to work.  

Anyone else been in a similar position? Have YOU ever left a job because a patient and/or family member was too much to deal with and/or negatively impacted your quality of life? 

Specializes in Physiology, CM, consulting, nsg edu, LNC, COB.
On 7/8/2021 at 9:05 PM, SilverBells said:

My gut feeling tells me this position probably needs to come to an end. 

Your gut and just about every poster on your threads. @@

6 Votes
Specializes in M/S, LTC, home care, corrections and psych.
On 7/5/2021 at 3:11 PM, SilverBells said:

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 Anyone else been in a similar position? Have YOU ever left a job because a patient and/or family member was too much to deal with and/or negatively impacted your quality of life? 

MANY years ago, as and LPN, I quit because the facility I worked at insisted that staff take a patient (HIV+ quadriplegic) outside to smoke. Bed and all. At all hours of the day and night. This patient was verbally abusive and attempted to spit on staff if not given his way. The lack of support from management and the fact that they didn't care that he was attempting to infect staff was when I was done. IF this were to happen today, I have no problems filing charges but back then nurses had no legal standing when faced with such abuse.  

4 Votes
Specializes in Wiping tears.

Ha! My ex-spouse, his mother, and some family members were a hell. I was embarrassed to go with them. My ex was the worst. The last time, I was in for his appointments, he was atrocious to office staff and nurses. He was that terrible person. There were encounters that some men attempted to kick his bottom. The last time I came in with his appt, the doctor lost it. I loved that doctor. He didn't let my ex ahole disrespected his staff. Got tired of his BS. 

The next day I received an acceptance letter from the nursing school, he pulled a divorce. I was in pain emotionally. Couldn't handle it halfway of my program, and I was ill again. I didn't return in his arms. My blood glucose was closed to 300. I was placed on A1C tests for a year. No DM. I also got steroid shots. Those helped me a lot. 

He was quiet for about two years. During this time, I looked like I wasn't sick anymore. Nope. I told him he gets his house, and I want my divorce paper. Not worth killing myself for someone who sucks the life of people and mine.
 

4 Votes
Specializes in Peds.

 

Some private duty families are off the wall,but with those types I can just chuck my deuces and move on to the next family.

I did quit HH visits because none of the families wanted an early nurse visit. Everyone wanted a visit between 11am-3pm,even though I was scheduled to work 830am to 4pm. I had to do 6 visits per day.

2 Votes
Specializes in NICU.

No ,but that does not mean I did not want to.Even had security and police up on unit.  Discharge usually saves the day.

 

Good luck to you ,wish you the best.

2 Votes
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