First let me say that I work in a L/D-PP-NSY unit in a rural hospital. We only have 2 OB's and I like them both very much. I had been warned about one of them - how he was practically bi-polar - and I have seen a few of his mood swings, but he has always been extremely nice to me - he's always joking - even when I call him in the middle of the night - so up to this point I have really loved my job! I've even commented that our low pay is compensated by a good working environment, and awesome physicians who treat us with respect. ...... well my little bubble was somewhat deflated this morning. Keep in mind - our unit is a combo unit, where I not only triage/labor - I also take care of PP, and assist in the nursery when needed. Last night I had a pt at 39 wk who was contracting somewhat irregular, with no cervical change after a couple of hrs, and so we sent her home Well, as I am giving report to my relief RN, she shows up with SROM. Because the RN that was relieving me was going to be the only one for OB/PP and her LPN was stuck in the Nsy with a baby on O2 - and had a scheduled C/S, I volunteered to stay and get the new patient admitted, orders done, etc... until the nurse we called in arrives. Well, I phoned the doc at 7:15 to inform him of patients return, and status and received the order to admit & pit & can start prepping her for epidural. So, as soon as I finish report - maybe less than 5 min, I started the process - which is alot - you know consents, Labs, IV starts, answering questions, etc.....Mixing antibiotics/pitocin/hyrating for epidural/giving pain meds, while anwering phone, dealing with the floor patients families questions, & had to give a few pain meds to floor patients while I am rushing to do all of this. Well.... to try to make a long story short - my relief shows up - it is now 8:20 - I am giving her report and in walks the doc. As I am telling her that he wants her to have pitocin - and was handing it to her - he lays into to me. Now we are standing at the nurses station which is about 12 ft from patients rooms, the cleaning lady is there, my relief nurse is there, and he chews me out thouroughly because I do not have the pit going - because he has to leave town at 10 am. Now this is a G1P1 who when she returned had progressed to 4/80/-1 on her own, and was ctx - although still somewhat irregular - q2-3 minutes. When he checked her a few minutes later she was 4.5/90/0 - so it wasn't like she was actually going to NEED pitocin to progress anyway. It was all about he needed her delivered before 10. He proceeded to state very loudly that the order was given at 7:15 am, and he expected me to start pit THEN, and he should not have to call the unit to see if I'm actually FOLLOWING his orders, because he just ASSUMED that I would do what he ordered - because he had REASONS he gives me orders, and It's my place to follow those orders, then he started blabbing about a study that shows if you admit a patient at 5cm, start pit 6x6, then they have blah blah blah (can't really remember what he said at this point) - then he said furthermore, I am the one with the DEGREE! (This last sentence is the one that got me!!) Then plopped the chart down walked off. OK now I am standing there - humiliated beyond all measure. My relief nurse had grabbed the bag of pit before he got done with his lecture, and promptly went to hang it - the cleaning lady was looking at me with sympathy - I was speechless. I sat down to chart everything that I had done for the patient so that I could actually go home, seeing how I had already stayed 1.5 hrs over to help - and he KNOWS I am staying late because our schedules are fixed - I am always on nights - and plus I had been the one to call him at 3 am. I had not sat down since that patient arrived, as I was rushing to get as much done as I could to help, and did not sit twiddling my thumbs saying, hmmm.....I don't think I'll start pit, because I don't think she needs it - because I am smarter than said doc - uh, NO. There is a process - that takes time. If he had said on the phone I am needing to leave town at 10am, so can you speed things along, then yes, maybe I would have been able to gotten things done a little faster by spending less time during consents explaining, and answering questions, etc... I just don't know! After he checked the patient, he comes back to the nurses station as I am charting, and asks me a few questions so he could fill in his progress notes, and as he gets up to leave, he pats me on the back and says "Thanks for your help - I'm not mad at you - I just needed you to really get this one going" - well, I could not even respond at this point because I have tears threatening to spill, and I'll be darned if I'm going to let him see me cry. I held it together by not talking to anyone - except to say goodbye at 9 am. I cried when I was in the privacy of my car. I cried when I was trying to go to sleep. I'm mad at him for being unprofessional, and repremanding me in front of my co-workers, and anyone else who walked by. I'm mad at myself for allowing him to humiliate me - I always swore I would walk away and if they had anything to say to me - they could come to me in private. I'm made that I could not control my tears, and speak back to him when he tried to half-A$$ apologize to me - believe me I had words I wanted to say. I'm mad that my skin is not tougher - that I have cried over this, and allowed it to upset me.
I guess I am fortunate that this is my first chewing, but I feel that although he did have a legitimate complaint - that I was taking a little too long - the manner in which is handled it was totally inappropriate.
Does it get easier? Does your skin ever grow thicker? I know the next time he sees me - he will be back to normal, and will act as if nothing ever happened, but I'm afraid I'm will not be so eager to resume our "friendly" conversations. I have decided in my mind that it will be business only - I will say what I need to say in regards to patient care, and refrain from carrying on with his constant joking, long conversations regarding his son's wakeboarding events, pretending interest in his rock-climbing stories. Ya know? Does this make me immature? I will not be rude or disrespectful, I just have no desire to be "personable" to him.
Sorry this is sooo long! I am one of those people who need to VENT to get things off my chest. I am still hurt. When in nursing school, I witnessed a doc chewing out an ICU nurse - in FRONT of the patient, all of us nursing students as well as her co-workers - and saw her later in the hallway crying, and being consoled.... that made a huge impression on me, and I can't believe I endured the same thing this morning. Somehow - I think I need a raise - LOL. My lovely working environment now longer compensates for the poor wages ! LOL
Specializes in Addiction & Recovery, Community Health.
Hey, people answer this too please...
Could she have said, mid yelling, "Please don't yell at me." I did it once and at least the person walked away instead of continuing the abuse. This sends the message I'm listening but you need to be respectful.
Of course, some people don't like when someone they percieve as a subordinate stands up for themselves. People like that can go to he**, as far as I'm concerned.
It's all about r-e-s-p-e-c-t. We all deserve it. ALL.
Could she have said, mid yelling, "Please don't yell at me." I did it once and at least the person walked away instead of continuing the abuse. This sends the message I'm listening but you need to be respectful.
Of course, some people don't like when someone they percieve as a subordinate stands up for themselves. People like that can go to he**, as far as I'm concerned.
It's all about r-e-s-p-e-c-t. We all deserve it. ALL.
Any feed back, please!!!???]
Please don't yell at me? Sorry that's just not me. If someone is going to yell at me in front of my coworkers i'm not going to give them the courtesy and say 'please'. I'm going to tell them that they are out of line and then i'm going to report their behavior.
No need, tell him you were not aware it was two for one day on a** h**** at the supermarket. Really, what is the big bad doctor going to do? He puts a hand on you, and he spends a night in jail, then has to explain in court why he assaulted a nurse. Then, you can put those tears to good work. I figure, he will back off real quick once you explain it these terms.
I understand other people may disagree with my stance; however, you let a bully get his/her way, and they will continue to push you around. Even more so in some cases.
I had many of the same problems as a new nurse. Then, I remember seeing this old battle axe of a nurse get yelled at by a surgeon. She, turned around and in front of every body yelled back, you arrogant *****, get the hell out of my ER." You know, direct confrontation works really well. Even better, when your fellow nurses have your back. (They should have your back IMHO.)
I love those old battle axe type nurses! I've worked with a few and have learned so much from them! (And they're usually the most intelligent and humorus nurses to work with if truth be known.)
Don't worry, you'll soon be more skilled at it. Just a couple months ago I took a to from a cardiac throacic sur. for amnoedorone. I asked him how he wanted it dosed,(cause you never know with him). He said dose it the the GD box says. (only her said the word). So, beining the good nurse that I am I wrote the order EXACTLY like he stated it, faxed it to the pharmacy. " Start Amnoedorone gtt like the God D#@% box says" The next day it was gone from the chart. The next time he gave me a to, for morphine, I said "would you like me to dose that like the GD box says ?"
I agree with the above poster that suggested going to him quietly and informing him that his behavior was not acceptable. You are professional collegues. He may not speak to you that way. He can be upset that you didn't get the pit going, but he certainly may not express it in those terms.
I wouldn't report behavior like that until I had tried to fix it myself. Reporting him sets up an adversarial relationship, and this is someone you will have to deal with again and again.
Doing nothing sets you up to have it happen again the next time you are in a situation and he doesn't like the outcom.
Tell him. Tell him his tone was inappropriate, as were his comments. Tell him that in the future, if there is a problem, he can certainly bring it to your attention, and you will do your best to rectify the situation, but he needs to bring it to your attention in a professional manner, and in a more appropriate setting. Not in front of the staff, the patients, family members, whatever.
It is up to you to let him know what you expect. And those expectations are NOT unreasonable.
I think you have worried too much about this jerk. He really did show his true colors. The patient didn't need the pitocin, it appears, and neither did the baby. You did nothing wrong. The only problem was he had some personal plans that this patient interfered with, and so he was prepared to push her labor along whether she needed it or not. That is unprofessional and I'm sure the patient would have refused the medication if she knew that was the reason. Sure he'll be friendly to you next time you meet, because after all you deserved your treatment, since you interfered with his trip and you are obviously inferior, in fact NOTHING, since you are not an MD. I'm sorry; I've seen plenty of this sort of thing. Has it occurred to you that by attacking you in front of your co-workers and questioning your competency and your abilities he slandered you? Which is a legal issue. You may not want to report this, but personally I think you should make your manager aware that you know this.
Why not, when you are calm, ask to see him privately and tell him that in the future, if he has a problem with you, he speak to you respectfully and in private?
Changing your behavior toward him is a little passive-agressive and you might be hanging on to a resentment unnecessarily.
It's just a thought.
I have to agree with this quote, working in Mental Health and educating Nurses in assertiveness, this is exactly what I would advocate.
Specializes in ICU of all kinds, CVICU, Cath Lab, ER..
What did you learn from this?
Well, the first thing is that you work with a selfish, self-serving orificehole ... solution? Speak to him professionally but speak to him!! The statement should be delivered in private and should cover any and all future complaints - done in private with no staff or patients third-party to the conversation.
What else did I learn? It doesn't pay to stay over to help. You and I are alike...a sense of ownership and loyalty both to our facility and our patient. I doubt you will ever learn enough to make you quit that part!! I would speak to whomever in your facility would provide proper staffing (oh, that term pops up again).... confide in them how you have not yet managed to answer the phone from the patient's room while starting an IV.
Hint: use words like SAFETY, PATIENT UNHAPPY, you know, those words that make a supervisor (house supervisor) get off her lazy coffee guzzling orifice and actually help a patient or a nurse!
Good luck and God Bless! The filthy worm owes you a lot more than an apology.
I would say that everyone on your unit is co-dependent to even "warn" you about the moods of a physician, who may or may not have a psychiatric condition or may or may not just be an a$$. Second of all, to refer to this as your "first" chewing out implies that you EXPECT to receive more. This tells me that you work in an unhealthy work environment. Please refer to the AACN website at http://ajcc.aacnjournals.org/cgi/content/full/14/3/187 to learn more about an establishing and maintaining healty work environments.
I do not feel lucky to work in a facility where it would be absolutely unacceptable for a physician to raise his or her voice to me. I am responsible for where I work and participate in committees to evaluate and maintain it. A nurse is much too valuable a resource to be mismanaged. If you work for a company that does not see that, go to another one and another one until you find one that does. Nurses are the single largest group of healthcare providers. We outnumber physicians 10 to one and administrators at around 40 to one. There are how many RN's and LPN's to your 2 physicians? The MD does not stand for minor diety. However, because everyone has catered to this behavior, it will not change overnight. It has to be established, however, that a hostile work environment will not be tolerated.
Many will say, do not report it, speak to him directly. However, that day has long passed thanks to the many nurses who have facilitated his poor behavior in the past. HR needs to know that this person raised his voice to you and suggested that you circumvent procedure to get him out of town on time. These are serious breeches of practice that must be reported over and over. NOT to your nursing supervisor either, what can he or she do? The medical director of your facility needs to be made aware of this physician's behavior. If you only knew how much power you have you would not hesitate to use it. A physician must then appear in person to the medical director and answer the complaint. The worst (or best) thing that could happen is that the physician will practice somewhere else where the nurses will kiss his sorry butt and make excuses for him and take his non-sense because he is the doctor.
You are a professional nurse; please don't forget that.
I as well as most of us here have been right there where you were. If your like me you put all of yourself into your work and it truely hurts when treated that way. I know we are overlooked many times when we go above and beyond and are doing a great job. I can live with that and feel good about myself. But when you doing your job and then some and are made to feel like a complete idiot and in front of patients and co-workers no less, it is simply mean. Some Doc's just simply enjoy being bullies. In their heads we just don't have the brain power to compete with them intellectually. They know we need our jobs and they can get away with it. Unfortunately I don't see this changing in our line of work. Our facilities need these Doctors and will always side with them. Maybe eventually our skin will become tougher and we will learn not to take things so personal but until then I hold on to the idea that what comes around goes around. :wink2:
suzi-Q
115 Posts
Hey, people answer this too please...
Could she have said, mid yelling, "Please don't yell at me." I did it once and at least the person walked away instead of continuing the abuse. This sends the message I'm listening but you need to be respectful.
Of course, some people don't like when someone they percieve as a subordinate stands up for themselves. People like that can go to he**, as far as I'm concerned.
It's all about r-e-s-p-e-c-t. We all deserve it. ALL.
Any feed back, please!!!???