got shouted at yesterday night

LilyBlue · Feb 28, 2009

I don't put up with that. No reason for you to, either. You are a human being, a professional even, not someone's verbal punching bag. And I don't buy into that ******** that they are ill and therefore it's fine to scream and curse you. I look patients dead in the eye and say, "I will not tolerate you speaking to me like that. I don't speak to you like that, and you don't speak to me like that". And if it continues, I have security come chat with them.

gonzo1, ASN, RN · Feb 28, 2009

How sad. Is he simply a brat, or is he compensating and/or acting out due to a serious illness?

chevyv, BSN, RN · Feb 28, 2009

I hope you 'schooled' him on the proper way to address those that are caring for his sorry butt! Sorry this 15 yr old felt it was ok to speak to you in the way he did. Hope you didn't take it!

WalkieTalkie, RN · Feb 28, 2009

I've had many people like this before, and most (and I repeat most) will calm down and shape up a bit if you just sit down, shut the door and have a little chat with them. Explain what you are doing, how many other patients you have, and that you are here to help them but that you can't be in the room 24/7.

allnurses Guide · Feb 28, 2009

I'd say "I'd be happy to come back when you can speak to me respectfully" and leave the room.

JB2007, ASN, RN · Feb 28, 2009

That does sound like a teenage boy to me. I have one of those lovely little critters in my house. Of course, he would not talk to someone like that because he knows his mother would make his life pretty miserable for a while if I found out. However, many children are not raised with consequences for their actions, so they think it is ok to act in such a manner.

eriksoln, BSN, RN · Feb 28, 2009

melz, I am willing to bet you are on a M/S floor.

Not saying this doesnt go on anywhere, but in my experience, it happens most often on M/S floors. Not because of the patients who are usually on M/S or because of anything the nurses do differently. Its just the natural flow of the process of sickness.

People come to us, the M/S unit, from other higher acuity floors. Or, if they have been in the hospital a number of times, perhaps they spent some time during another admission on a higher acuity unit. They see the nurse on the other unit more often, because they are in a higher acuity environment and are by default checked on more frequently. When they then go to a lower level of care, they resent not getting the 1:1 they had before. The M/S unit often times is used to assist the person back to independence, back to not relying on others. Sometimes patients resist this and demand the same attention on the M/S unit they were getting at the ICU or Step-down.

I dont recommend "schooling" the patient or even confronting them about their attitude. Instead, point out how well they are doing, how you have great faith in them getting better. That will go much further in preparing the patient for returning home.

tencat · Feb 28, 2009

With a 15 year-old I'd probably have said something like "If you yell at me, something strange happens. I actually get SLOWER.....it happens with old age.....you'll have to watch out for it as YOU get older." You have to be able to say it with a straight face. He'll think you are WAY crazier than he is, and he'd probably better comply and be nicer as who knows what crazy nurse MIGHT be up to......:) Gotta keep adolescents on their toes, especially when they are PITA to deal with. Of course, I'm assuming he's not deathly ill. Now if he keeps yelling, then we need to have a chat....

Jules A, MSN · Feb 28, 2009

While I would have had "the chat" with him I'd also keep in mind that he is a 15 year old. Not making excuses and yes he could just be a brat but he also could be terrified, in pain, so used to being neglected that acting out and demanding attention is the only way his needs are met and/or mentally ill. As you work with him more it will get easier to figure out how to be the most therapeutic. Hang in there, they can be rough but are also most wonderful creatures once you have a good rapport with them.

rngolfer53 · Feb 28, 2009

While I would have had "the chat" with him I'd also keep in mind that he is a 15 year old. Not making excuses and yes he could just be a brat but he also could be terrified, in pain, so used to being neglected that acting out and demanding attention is the only way his needs are met and/or mentally ill. As you work with him more it will get easier to figure out how to be the most therapeutic. Hang in there, they can be rough but are also most wonderful creatures once you have a good rapport with them.

My cousin who has managed to get 8 teenagers thru to adulthood maintains that kids are brain dead for a few years starting about 15 or so.

I would tend to cut the kid some slack, because kids aren't adults. This could be a time to set an example of how to react in an adult manner. Address the problem--his yelling at the nurse--while not making it personal in any way.

We have all too many putative adults who are behaving like children, and we continue to make excuses for them. Being sick or stressed does not relieve an adult of the duty to act like one.

survivor08 · Feb 28, 2009

RIGHT ON...unfortunately these type of adults will just call the NM or house supervisor if you answer them like you do so and you will get a good talking to or write up at my hospital, unfortunatly security is way too busy to handle calls re: verbal abuse by a pt, we are to just smile, apoligize, suck it up and move on. It's all about having good pt scores so our managers and muckity mucks can get raises.