Do nurses make the worse family members or patients ?

[NurseLoveJoy88, ASN, RN]

This week two different instructors told us students stories of when their family was in the hospital and how they acted and what they did. One instructor told us that her dad needed to have bone marrow aspiration done in the sternum and the resident did not offer any analgesic. Then she told her father that he really needs to get some an analgesic because the procedure may be painful. Ofcourse her dad listened, and she was just saying how us nurses need to be a pt. advocate. She is a CRNP. She did not mention her title to the MD however she did go to her dad privately and was his advocate.

The other instructor told us a story regarding her neice and how the nurses treated her neice so badly because it was suspected that the child had mennigitis.She said the nurses were frantic and was wearing PPE even though they was no definite dx yet. She said the doctor did not even wear ppe when doing the spinal tap however the nurses did . She said that she don't like for nurses to know she's a RN until the nurse really ****** her off. She says that once she got irritated by the nurses she started writing down their names and told them that if they keep acting like this she was going to their nursing manager Mrs. X. She also told us that the nursing manager is part of the commitee on the BON and the instructor has sat in on many meetings with this nursing manager, so basically she knows her pretty well. The instructor told us that as soon as she threatned the nurses to talk c- their nursing manager all of the nurses changed their attitude and showed a little more respect. They showed respect once they knew my instructor was a RN and when she stated that she knew their nursing manager pretty well.

My question is: Do nurses make the worse patients or family members ? Should nurses who are family members threaten the other nurses ? How do you handle things when you are not satisfied with a nurse taking care of your family member ? My mother is a nurse and she's always been a advocate for any family member in the hospital. But how far is too far to actually threatned other nurses ?

[mama_d, BSN, RN]

the instructor told us that as soon as she threatned the nurses to talk c- their nursing manager all of the nurses changed their attitude and showed a little more respect. they showed respect once they knew my instructor was a rn and when she stated that she knew their nursing manager pretty well.

that wasn't respect...it was fear that someone who was abusing their connections would go and tattle and possible lose them their jobs. and if it's suspected meningitis (depending on the type), she should know that ppe is recommended, and should be using this as an example of when the nurses did right and the docs did wrong.

when a patient or a family member is a nurse, it seems like they either are the best or the worst, with no inbetween.

worst is when they are know-it-all, domineering, obnoxious snots. i hate it when i get "well, i'm a nurse at an assisted living facility, so blah blah blah" telling me how to do my job. working at an al gives absolutely no insight into what my shift or my patients on the tele floor are like. i would never act that way...when our son was 2 months old and in the hospital, my line was "i'm a tele nurse, i treat grown ups, this is not my thing. y'all do what you gotta do and tell me how i can help you out."

i could go on and on here...basically, i think the golden rule applies here. if you would be outraged if someone was treating you in a certain way, don't do it to someone else. yes, there are times when family members/patients need to speak up, but you'll catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. diplomacy will get much better care and attitude than threats.

[StNeotser, ASN, RN]

I've had some great nurses as family members. I like when they see you running somewhere or reading something they say politely "Whenever you're not busy I need to ask you something and I'll just wait over here" - motioning to waiting area so they are not hovering over you. :)

Only had one that I can remember being a bit of a pain.

[hikernurse]

I've found nurses tend to be pretty good patients overall and understanding of what needs to be done. I treat my nurse parents (NICU) as regular parents, but I can go into more detail about their diagnosis/treatment, etc. since they are usually familiar with the terms.

When my children have been in the hospital, I already knew the majority of staff who cared for them, and that was great. I did more as a mom because I am already a nurse--I know the importance of ambulation, I made sure they got cleaned up, etc. I know the nurses would have stepped in, but it was something that made me feel useful :). I've noticed the same thing with other nurses--they tend to assume more care of their family members when they are patients.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

my sister (a gucci nurse) is the not worst family member i've ever encountered, although i sure would hate to be the nurse taking care of her or a family member! she's famous in the nursing field, and tends to try to throw her weight around to get special privleges. the sad thing is, she hasn't been near the bedside in 25 years, and some of the things she's demanding aren't what she should be wanting! by contrast, i try to behave as i'd like family members of my patients to behave, and that does not include throwing a fit to get dad a room with a better view!

[Virgo_RN, BSN, RN]

I've had both. Some patients/family members don't even mention that they are a nurse, and behave politely and respectfully.

Others mention it right from the start, as if that will affect the kind of care they get from me. Since I give every patient my best, this annoys me.

[CoffeeRTC, BSN, RN]

I dunno. I treat everyone the same. When I find out a pt or family member is an nurse, I always ask them what type of nurse and will judge how much they might/ might not know. I still explain everything I do as far as care, etc.

When someone finds out I'm a nurse (I tend to hide it) I let them know that I'm just a pt or family member. Since I'm not into peds or OB, I let them know that I'm clueless in those fields.

[GooeyRN, ADN, BSN, CNA, LPN, RN]

I have seen both. I had one saying she was a legal nurse consultant and threatening to sue if I did not make her room mate turn her tv off at 7pm. Not turn it down, turn it off, b/c she does not like tv's. Others don't say they are a nurse at all and are really nice,

I personally do not share that I am a nurse, unless I am asked about work history. I did not mention it when my ds was hospitalized earlier this month. I did not want anyone to feel like I was watching their every breath, even though I was.

[Jolie, BSN]

The other instructor told us a story regarding her neice and how the nurses treated her neice so badly because it was suspected that the child had mennigitis.She said the nurses were frantic and was wearing PPE even though they was no definite dx yet.

Wearing appropriate protective gear to prevent the unncessary spread of a life-threatening infectious disease is hardly treaing a patient badly.

Would this nurse also accuse a fellow professional of treating a patient badly for wearing gloves to draw blood? Sheesh.

[netglow, ASN, RN]

Thing is, I won't ever let you know I am a nursing student, and when I get my license I will not say that I am an RN. Just do your job and I won't be a problem. I am not picky, just want you on your toes and safe with my family. I will pull you off so fast you won't know what hit ya if you are a mess. And I'll go straight to your NM without saying a word to you. :sfxpld:

[rn2bnwi, BSN, RN]

ive only had positive experiences.

[RN1982]

There are some that like to throw their rank around like they are so special. As if, I'm suppose to be threatened by the fact that they are a nurse. If they say, "I'm a nurse"....I respond "that's nice. So am I".