Can we feed the Family?

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I work in LTC - and have a resident whose wife comes in right after breakfast and stays with her husband until after supper. She wanted to keep him at home but was not able to do his occasional episodes of confusion, but while she is there she prefers to care for him herself and asks for help very rarely - she lets me know when she feels he need pain medication or his blood sugars are low. In my facility we are given a half hour for lunch and offered the same menu as thr residents for "free" - even though we lose that half hour of work time. My GNA's and myself had been skipping lunch, making out a request for a tray and giving it to this lady, because she is there and we do not feel that she should have to pay for it when we want to give it to her so she does not have to pay 3 dollars for a guest tray, which is also the same foods the residents have for that meal. Today my adminstrator tells me that I am not allowed to do this anymore, that she will have to pay for her meals. I can tell from observation that these folks do not have lots of money to spend, and my feeling is that if she is there caring for her husband, the least we can do is feed her lunch. I am a little peeved at this - and not sure why if I get a lunch and I dont want it why it is not right for her to have it instead of my tossing it in the garbage - which is what I did with it today. How do other facilities handle this situation, and do you think I am wrong for giving this lady something to eat?

Specializes in Geriatrics, Cardiac, ICU.
The problem is this...if you make an exception for a lady, then you also have to make exception for other people who have similar situation. one lady's lunch costs $3, and 10 ladies equal to $30 a day or $210 a week or $840 a month. Anyone who wants to try the cost for the whole year?

Not really. In this case no exception is being made. If every employee gave up their lunch for a family member, then they aren't losing anything. The facility decided they had enough money to offer free lunches to employees. If the employee gives it away and doesn't get an additional meal, then all that happened is that the food went into someone elses mouth. I just don't see the difference and I think the administrator is just nickel and dimeing to death; seems like they are just mad they aren't making $21 dollars a week of this lady and that is what is pitiful to me.

I doubt all the employees are giving their lunches away though.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
What is the world coming to. Everything is about M O N E Y.

Suprise! :trout:

Actually, I can see the points of BOTH Chuck and CRNA.

1.) The job off the administrator IS to cut costs.

2.) The facility DOES offer free meals to their employees, so if an employee wishes to offer their meal to this lady, there should be no problem.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I don't think there should be a problem with giving it to her. But you work might feel that they are obligated to make sure that she isn't getting anything that she might be algerice to or can't eat cause of her health. But I think they should make special exceptions for her since her husband is living there.

Sarah

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Nurses who are mentally sicked.
I don't think there should be a problem with giving it to her. But you work might feel that they are obligated to make sure that she isn't getting anything that she might be algerice to or can't eat cause of her health. But I think they should make special exceptions for her since her husband is living there.

Sarah

Once you made an exception for one, then you have to prepare to make exception for many others. As a nurse, I don't have any problem with that. As an administrator, that is a "big problem."

Up Vote Up Vote ×
When people say things like this, it kind of irks me (not a personal attack against you :) ). However, I wish people would take a business or healthcare finance class. Facilities (whether they be LTC, hospitals, outpatient clinics, physician offices, etc.) NEED to pinch costs. We are in a time where all healthcare professionals are DEMANDING wage increases (including nurses -- heck, nurses account for the majority of the wages in a hospital). If nurses are demanding $X an hour with full benefits, along with other allied health professionals in the facility, they need to pinch costs to pay out these wages.

And yes it is sad to think that everything comes down to money; but one must understand that money drives everything. Without the motivation of money, our world wouldn't exist as it is today.

As someone that has taken a business course here and there in an MBA cirriculum specializing in health care - I can see what you are saying on one hand SisterMike. It is important to maintain solvency of the facility (aka keeping the lights on et al). Try to be cost effective and efficient has possible. I totally get that.

However, this person IS participating in this patients care and health care provider hours are thus being allocated toward the care of others in this facility. So, perhaps putting a pen to paper - hourly wages of the nursing staff et al caring for this patient and the $$$ they are making on this patient for nursing care that the wife is actually providing should perhaps be reconsidered. (I don't recall the acuity level of the patient) - I don't *think* that meals for this lady would be too much to ask for.

Nothing personal - Just my thoughts on when thinking about more of the economics involved.

Sy,

Ginger

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC.

I am sure that cost containment has a big role in this situation - my thoughts are also on that all mighty public relations issue , where recruiting and word of mouth help you to get your beds filled in a time where there is more opportunity to have home care available - and in my rural area, word of mouth is like gold to us. Today I will offer up to my floor staff that we all pitch in that 50 cents so she can eat - hope its a meal that is even worth 50 cents today - and I also wonder this - how much does corporate pay for those administrative luncheons, inservices out of facility ( which btw my facility does NOT help pay for if its nurses want to attend) - and is there really a reason to hire 5 different people to answer the phones? - This has been interesting to read your replies, I cant wait til tonite to see if I get any more ;)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Neuro/Med-Surg/Oncology.

I'm wondering if the concern is that this woman thinks the meal is being provided by the facility instead of the employees. If she tells people that she's geting a meal from the facility, they will expect them too. That could create a big mess. Perhaps the admins are trying to cut this one off at the chase. If she clearly understands that the employees are doing this of their own volition and not a routine thing, I don't thing it should be a big problem. Just make sure she knows to treat it as "our little secret."

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac.

It's a very nice thing to do and I see no harm, especially since someone is giving them their own lunch.

But from an administrative view you can't feed visitors, and that's a good rule. Perhaps one that should be flexible, but I don't think you should be feeding vistors. Once you make the exception all visitors might expect it.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
it's a very nice thing to do and i see no harm, especially since someone is giving them their own lunch.

but from an administrative view you can't feed visitors, and that's a good rule. perhaps one that should be flexible, but i don't think you should be feeding vistors. once you make the exception all visitors might expect it.

i'm not wild about the expectation that seems to be growing that the employees should provide lunch for this lady. what might be 50 cents per employee per day for one visitor may turn into $1.50 per employee per day because now someone has decided that there are two other visitors who "deserve" to be fed. and some folks just don't have enough slack in their budgets to feed visitors. nor should they be expected to. the minute you set up the expectation that the employees will give up their lunches every day to feed a visitor, the visitor comes to expect it, and if you happen to be the one nurse who needs to eat the lunch the facility provides for whatever reason, or can't afford to chip in for the visitor's lunch, you immediately become the "bad" nurse. i don't think that's fair.

if administration doesn't want the visitor being fed, perhaps she could bring a sack lunch from home, or pay to eat in the cafeteria, or something.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

As it applies in this situation, I can see it from both sides of the issue. I don't know what the easy answer is, or if there is one.

As it applies to where I work, yes, I have been known to grab an extra meal tray for a new father who has been with his laboring wife constantly for 36 hours before she had a c/s for failure to progress and has had zero to eat in that time. (Dietary sends several extra meal trays to our floor each meal, not stealing from someone else's food.) Especially if the cafeteria is closed. I sometimes heat him a microwave dinner too. That doesn't happen often, and I really don't think it's a big deal. So far our facility has stayed very solvent.

On the other hand, I will NOT bring 28 apple juices to your room for your 14 family members. That's not my job and it's not appropriate.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
i'm not wild about the expectation that seems to be growing that the employees should provide lunch for this lady. what might be 50 cents per employee per day for one visitor may turn into $1.50 per employee per day because now someone has decided that there are two other visitors who "deserve" to be fed. and some folks just don't have enough slack in their budgets to feed visitors. nor should they be expected to. the minute you set up the expectation that the employees will give up their lunches every day to feed a visitor, the visitor comes to expect it, and if you happen to be the one nurse who needs to eat the lunch the facility provides for whatever reason, or can't afford to chip in for the visitor's lunch, you immediately become the "bad" nurse. i don't think that's fair.

if administration doesn't want the visitor being fed, perhaps she could bring a sack lunch from home, or pay to eat in the cafeteria, or something.

i believe that i agree with ruby. granted, feeding this one lady isn't going to break the facility - but when does it stop? also, what about the employees that want their lunches.

if you annoy the administration enough about this, they may well stop the employees free lunch program altogether, which could hurt some of the employees that don't make as much as the nurses.

op - you're a very kind hearted person and i understand the quandry you're in. bring her something from home, maybe?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in NICU, ER, OR.

How did admin even find out?

Dollar for Dollar, no, it makes no difference. But the problem lies in, as others have said, where another nurse will be on one day, and not be willing to give her lunch away, and the wife will wonder where her lunch is that has been provided to her all this time. And, as you said about your town and word of mouth activity, *it will spread around* that when you visit at meal times, you get a free meal, when in reality you dont, its just an employee being generous. Of course, that is not in the facilities best interest.Financially, or customer service wise. I completely understand their reasoning behind this, and think it is completely appropriate. Now having said that, if I didnt want my free lunch, I would absolutely give it to her. But I would make sure she understood the situation.

Regardless of how much care she does for her husband. He is still taking up a bed, so I dont think that has anything to do with the issue.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment