Am I too sensitive - new charge

Nurses General Nursing

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Specializes in OBGYN, Neonatal.

I am new to being charge and while I was not wanting to do it so soon (just a year of experience) I am ok with doing it now, but its very busy because we are almost always understaffed and I do secretary work, CNA work and charge nurse work. I'm getting used to that. My problem is, my coworkers are super nice to work with for the most part but I feel like as soon as I do charge they change, not all but some. It's like nobody is ever happy with the assignment, always something to complain about and its not always outright complaining, sometimes its more passive aggressive like ugh why is it this way or why am I that way. You can never please two people at the same time it seems.

So what is it? I'm frustrated, I mean nobody wants to be overworked but come on, if you are going to complain about it every day then talk to someone who can change things or come up with a solution that fixes the problem. Some days I just want to say SUCK IT UP. But I'm trying to be nice and fair and its getting annoying! I ask for opinions when doing the assignment because I want to make sure it is fair but there is always someone who complains.

So how do you stop taking it personally? These people that I work so well with just seem totally different when I'm not the bedside nurse but am the charge nurse. And I don't direct/boss or anything like that - I make assignments, help everyone with their duties and answer questions - so its not like I'm out there being Miss Bossy Pants.

I dunno, maybe charge means "one to be mad at" in another language :rolleyes::uhoh21: I think one of the reasons I take it to heart is that I don't do that to my charge nurses, I don't question their assignments (if it were unfair I'd ask but its not) and I don't grumble to them about everything.

Specializes in ICU/Critical Care.

Welcome to the wonderful world of being in charge. I hated it when I did it because my attitude is, "deal with it". I have no patience for people the constantly whine about having to do their job so I wasn't a good fit for charge. Make your assignments according to the guidelines, if there are any, that management give you. If they have a problem, let them deal with it.

Specializes in Cardiac Telemetry, ED.

I agree with Michigan. As charge, you really can't please everybody. All you can do is your best to be fair.

Just always do the right thing, if the other people do not get it? Than oh well. You have went above and beyond what other people may have done in the same situation. You have actually thought about other peoples feelings. That is the way I live my life :) Rhonda

Specializes in MS, ER.

I too have experienced the same problem. I spoke to my unit director, she offered a great solution, "tell them if they do not like your decision, to come see me!". It actually worked quite well, after hours I would give them her number and ask them to call if they did not like the assigment or the plethera of other complaints some nurses have about actually having to do some work.

Specializes in med-surg, telemetry,geriatrics.
I am new to being charge and while I was not wanting to do it so soon (just a year of experience) I am ok with doing it now, but its very busy because we are almost always understaffed and I do secretary work, CNA work and charge nurse work. I'm getting used to that. My problem is, my coworkers are super nice to work with for the most part but I feel like as soon as I do charge they change, not all but some. It's like nobody is ever happy with the assignment, always something to complain about and its not always outright complaining, sometimes its more passive aggressive like ugh why is it this way or why am I that way. You can never please two people at the same time it seems.

So what is it? I'm frustrated, I mean nobody wants to be overworked but come on, if you are going to complain about it every day then talk to someone who can change things or come up with a solution that fixes the problem. Some days I just want to say SUCK IT UP. But I'm trying to be nice and fair and its getting annoying! I ask for opinions when doing the assignment because I want to make sure it is fair but there is always someone who complains.

So how do you stop taking it personally? These people that I work so well with just seem totally different when I'm not the bedside nurse but am the charge nurse. And I don't direct/boss or anything like that - I make assignments, help everyone with their duties and answer questions - so its not like I'm out there being Miss Bossy Pants.

I dunno, maybe charge means "one to be mad at" in another language :rolleyes::uhoh21: I think one of the reasons I take it to heart is that I don't do that to my charge nurses, I don't question their assignments (if it were unfair I'd ask but its not) and I don't grumble to them about everything.

My wife went through this for 8 years. Doing for everyone, managers, nurses, cna's, administration, admitting, ER, all departments, and had to take a full team of 8-10 patients and had to make all the calls to docotors for 56 beds then put in orders and sign them off. Plus start IV's lazy ass nurses would not even try once or twice to get. List goes on, she made a real nice salary for the free overtime she did and mandatory meetings ect... When she left for a better job after giving a months notice they gave a close friend of my wife's the job for 15K more per year and more benefits. The whole time I told my wife "Keep work -work and keep home -home" meaning dont take your personal life to work or make friendships other than in a professional sense cause it will muck up your world. "DONT TRY TO MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY, ITS NOT YOUR JOB"

Specializes in tele, oncology.

Sometimes we're just blowing off steam....I'm one of those that will gripe a little initially but then roll up my sleeves and roll with the punches for the rest of the shift. I know that the charge has to do what they can with what they've got, but that doesn't mean I have to like the situation that we're all put in. We all have a good rapport with each other on my shift though and everyone knows that we're just venting a little about situations beyond our control before we buckle down to deal with what we've got. We don't actually expect the charge to be able to change anything, it's more of a mutual acknowledgement of a sucky situation and then we move on.

I have asked before when I have a particularly heavy assignment if there's any way to rearrange it...and usually get told that the whole darn floor is heavy. Which gets an okay and a moving on.

There are some nurses who get pulled to our floor from our sister floors sometimes who do nothing but whine and moan all night long and make things miserable for everyone...I try to diplomatically tell them to shut the heck up and do their job. They're the ones that even if they had a 3:1 ratio instead of a 5-6:1 ratio with the same acuity patients they'd find something to complain about loudly all night long. We just thank the powers that be that they're not our regular staff when they go.

Specializes in OBGYN, Neonatal.
Sometimes we're just blowing off steam....I'm one of those that will gripe a little initially but then roll up my sleeves and roll with the punches for the rest of the shift. I know that the charge has to do what they can with what they've got, but that doesn't mean I have to like the situation that we're all put in. We all have a good rapport with each other on my shift though and everyone knows that we're just venting a little about situations beyond our control before we buckle down to deal with what we've got. We don't actually expect the charge to be able to change anything, it's more of a mutual acknowledgement of a sucky situation and then we move on.

I have asked before when I have a particularly heavy assignment if there's any way to rearrange it...and usually get told that the whole darn floor is heavy. Which gets an okay and a moving on.

There are some nurses who get pulled to our floor from our sister floors sometimes who do nothing but whine and moan all night long and make things miserable for everyone...I try to diplomatically tell them to shut the heck up and do their job. They're the ones that even if they had a 3:1 ratio instead of a 5-6:1 ratio with the same acuity patients they'd find something to complain about loudly all night long. We just thank the powers that be that they're not our regular staff when they go.

Exactly I totally understand what you are saying - I vent and blow off steam too but I do it out loud while talking with my coworkers but I don't give it to the charge like when I'm getting the next admit, "why am I getting an admit". I look at the assignment and I can usually tell why - b/c I"m the next up, but some people even if they have a lighter assignment still complain about getting another admission - you just want to cry! But most people yes are just venting and thats fine, I like to vent too :) makes life easier! I just get frustrated with the 'tude that some people give off. Thankfully the majority of people are able to roll up their sleeves and keep going.

I agree with you too - if an assignment is heavy I will look to see what others are like, most of the time all of us have a heavy assignment, but like you said you can ask and see that its pretty even.

Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.

It is hard to please everyone, and sometimes, it is not worth trying. In fact, I am sure you would rather not be in charge, so, if you are charging, and don't want to, then, they have to do things they don't wish to as well. This may not be the nicest response but it is realistic.

Our ratios are 4 patients per nurse so if a nurse has 3 patients they pretty much know they are up for an admit. I try to give them a warning, such as " Sandra just got an admit the next one will be yours", sometimes they never get one but at least they get some notice. If someone complains actively or passively I usually say " Well who do you think I should give the next patient to" The usual response is " I don't know" or "well your charge that is not my decision" then I say " that is why I am giving you the next patient" It usually shuts them up. Charge is a hard position, especially if it changes from day to day who is charge. You have responsibility but no real authority when it comes to co-workers.

The longer you do charge the easier it is to not take these complaints personally.

Specializes in tele, oncology.

We have a whiteboard at the front nurses station that has the room numbers, pt name (first only, of course), nurse assigned, and whether or not they're tele, tele/oncology, med/oncolgy, or straight medical. You know at the beginning of the shift how many empty rooms you have and where they're at. I personally like it when the charge nurse puts in the order of admits to the empty rooms (instead of pt name on the board it will say 1, 2, 3, etc.) so that we know to keep an eye on it and can tell when it's getting close to our turn. Doesn't help as much when the bed coordinator calls us five names at once, but when it's a one by one thing you know it's your turn and people complain less.

Specializes in Ortho, Case Management, blabla.

I too got thrown into the charge position. Partially because no one else wanted to do it, partially because a lot of my coworkers couldn't handle it without melting down (and got "fired" from the position). Some of those in the latter category have been pretty catty about it.

I've learned a few things so far about being charge (in the 6 months since I started doing it)...

#1. You cannot make everyone happy all of the time.

#2. There will always be someone "drowning" no matter how much you help them...you will learn who these people are very quickly.

#3. You are the person that everyone will complain to. No matter what. Let this bounce off you and give them support. If someone says, "I didn't even get my lunch!!!" Don't get defensive, it's not your fault. It's their own fault or they just had some crappy circumstances with their patients. Let them vent. Then make sure you sign them off to get that extra 30 minutes of pay.

#4. Assume that everyone talks behind your back. (No offense, ladies) Women are women, and women are social creatures. Don't let it bother you. Don't trash talk anybody at all. Try to set an example for everyone else.

#5. Do not be the first one punched out and out the door with the CNAs at the end of your shift. Make sure you touch base with everyone and ensure there isn't anything you can do for them.

#6. Swallow your pride.

#7. You're caught between what the manager wants and what the nurses want. Again, you can't please everybody! But remember who signs your checks...

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