"Honey"

Altra, BSN, RN · Sep 22, 2006

Honey, sweetie, dear ... are common in my area. They roll off my tongue easily. They're not the first words out of my mouth, though, and I'm confident in my ability to get a patient's "vibe" and adjust myself accordingly.

Only occasionally do I feel that a (male) patient or visitor is using one of these terms in a patronizing way toward me. Either 1) immediately shifting into a noticeably more formal mode of conversation with corresponding facial expression & body language or 2) a snappy comeback ... usually "levels the playing field" and smooths things over.

cad4296 · Sep 22, 2006

It doesn't usually bother me but coming from younger people is irritating. I had a classmate once who called everyone hun all the time! I can understand using it if you forget names at first, but she knew my name so it kinda irked me. I think it was mostly just annoying hearing the word coming out of her mouth every 2 seconds! She had to start or end every sentence using hun. My sister in law however has a major pet peeve about it! She once told a waitress (well younger than us) to not call her hun. At my current job (not a nurse yet) I've had customers call me everything from sunshine to sweety and everything in between. Doesn't really bother me unless its younger people or people my age using it.

LauraLou · Sep 22, 2006

If you don't like being called "honey", "sweetie" don't come to Texas! You'd be in a constant state of irritation!

You can be condescending or patronizing just as easily using someone's name as you can saying honey. It's all in how you say it. If you intend to be insulting and talk down someone, it will come across that way regardless of your choice of wording.

To be irritated by someone calling you honey when they mean it in a nice way seems petty to me. But maybe I'd feel differently if I lived in another part of the country.

lovingtheunloved, ASN, RN · Sep 23, 2006

If you don't like being called "honey", "sweetie" don't come to Texas! You'd be in a constant state of irritation!
You can be condescending or patronizing just as easily using someone's name as you can saying honey. It's all in how you say it. If you intend to be insulting and talk down someone, it will come across that way regardless of your choice of wording.
To be irritated by someone calling you honey when they mean it in a nice way seems petty to me. But maybe I'd feel differently if I lived in another part of the country.

Yeah, I'm not from the south and don't live there now. And I don't mean patients calling me honey. I'm talking about a 20 year old know it all who in all likelihood DOES mean it in a condescending way.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Sep 23, 2006

If that bothers you, don't ever move down south. The southern hospitality would kill you.

It may bother me, but so far it hasn't killed me.

leslie :-D · Sep 23, 2006

It may bother me, but so far it hasn't killed me.

why hello there honeypie?

how is my favorite little sugarplum today?

i was going to pm you but decided against it, knowing i couldn't refrain from showering you with my sugar-coated hugs and kisses. (lip-stick smudged smooch coming your way!!):rotfl:

sigh....

are ya dead yet?

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Sep 23, 2006

No, but the acid's burning my throat now lol. And i suddenly feel the need for a bath.

I swear if a nurse really approached me talking like that, i'd hold up my ID band, and ask fora call to be put through to infection control.

Antikigirl, ASN, RN · Sep 23, 2006

I have to keep myself in check with this ever since I worked in an LTC/ALF for 4 years. After that amount of time we all called eachother hon, honey, sweety, doll, love, etc. It actually did become second nature to me after that long.

I caught myself once calling my charge nurse last week "hon" and she nabbed me on it and I appologized and told her to help me work on that (and she totally understood when I told her about the LTC/ALF...LOL!). So it is something I am working on too! I don't mean to offend anyone, it just became habit...and suprisingly a hard one to break! But I am getting there...LOL!

I don't mind it said to me, kinda perks up my day a bit knowing my patients accept me enough to call me something nice...and fellow workers, it is nice too!!!!!!! But yep, trying to keep it in balance :)...

jb2u, ASN, RN · Sep 23, 2006

When I went through my CNA training, we were told to NEVER call pt's by "honey, sweetie, etc."

In Nursing school, we are told to NEVER call pt's by "honey, sweetie, etc."

I always address my pt's by Mr./Ms._____. If they insist on being called by their first name...("please, call me Mike") I will then call them Mr. Mike. I can't really grasp calling a stranger by their first names especially the elderly. That's just my "issue" or at least ONE of them!

Elisheva · Sep 23, 2006

It galls me when some 18 year old at a fast food restaurant calls me "sweetie" or "hon." That's assuming a familiarity that we don't have, thank you very much. And, I never called patients by such terms of endearment for the same reason. My issue, too. I don't care what anyone else does.

jenrninmi, MSN, RN · Sep 23, 2006

You are not alone.
If you feel it patronizing, then it's patronizing and you should ask people to stop.
I personally don't feel as you do, although I don't use those kinds of words to coworkers. I notice the people I work with call each other 'baby' and 'honey' sometimes. It doesn't sound patronizing when they do it. It doesn't bother me when they do it to me because it means I'm in their good graces at the moment. :)

That's how I feel. I don't do it to coworkers but sometimes to patients. And it's not because I forgot their name.

nurse4theplanet, RN · Sep 23, 2006

Just don't call me by any names that couldn't be said in front of my preacher and I'll be A-OK!!!