Friends at work?

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Just the other day I heard someone say she didn't come to work to make new friends and that comment kind of stuck with me. How do you see that? According to her, every other person says something, but when she does, these same friends run along and are the first to turn her in.

Specializes in LTC, Disease Management, smoking Cessati.

I get along with everyone I work with, but am very careful about socializing outside of work. I find those kinds of friendships can end up being an anchor rather than a joy. At work I need to work, and have support of my co workers but as best friends... I'm not that trusting... Just my take on it for me.

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Specializes in Psychiatric.

I have made 3 very good friends at the job that I have now, in our group of 57 people...one doctor, 2 case managers...but I don't go to work to make friends. I have friends as well who have nothing at all to do with my job.

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I have quite a few real friends at work and lots others that I am just friendly with. I guess I've been really fortunate to work with a lot of really great people. We all get along really well and while there is the odd hiccup, it's a pretty great team including new additions over the years. I've been there ten years and have only had one minor backstabbing incident probably because in general we deal with issues amongst ourselves. I do socialize with some of my colleagues sometimes outside of work and so far no problems!

I didn't go to work to make friends but having friends at work for me is part of what makes the job a good one - people who are happy to help you, to support you through the rough days, to laugh with, who you can depend on and who really understand the ups and downs of the job. I guess we aren't a very competitive bunch!

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Specializes in Ortho, Case Management, blabla.

I don't really consider many of my coworkers friends. I may add them on facebook but they get relegated to a group that doesn't get my personal information. They get to see pictures of my kids on there, thats about it!

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Specializes in Peds Hem, Onc, Med/Surg.

Honestly the people I work with are acquaintances. while they know about me, and we do go out sometimes together, they do not know the nitty gritty stuff about me. And I rather they don't. I work really hard to keep my personal life and work life separate just because I have burned before. Its really uncomfortable when things like that blow up and then you work with them. So I rather not deal with it.

Besides when I go out to relax the last thing I want to hear is about work.

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I have three friends that I will see outside of work. I've worked at the same place for nearly five years and two of these people I never actually see at work anymore as we've changed units/shifts.

There was a lot of trust built up before we started hanging out outside of work.

There are people at work that I consider great colleagues and am very friendly with AT WORK, but I do not really consider real friends. We will sometimes go out after shifts or to work gatherings but I consider these people acquaintances.

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Specializes in Med-Surg.

I am friendly with my coworkers, and after 17 years have a couple of friends at work. I socialize outside of work very rarely with them however. It's hard to work beside someone year after year and not consider them a "friend", although it's true we come to work to work and take care of patients not to make friends.

If friendship happens, I'm not going to stick my nose up in the air and worry about backstabbers, I'm going to let it happen.

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Choose your friends carefully. Recently my boss told me that two of my work 'friends' were just using me to do their work. He was right! :o

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Do people get paid to make friends at work? How about being friendly with people, and when your shift ends leaving everything work related in the hospital.

I make friends with people I take a course with, but someone at work? If something goes wrong, I don't want to be stuck working with them.

Being professional and respecful is enough. You don't have to go to work to make friends that's not what you're being paid for..

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Specializes in Geriatrics, Home Health.

I'm friendly with my co-workers, but I don't socialize with them. Workplace friendships have never worked from me. It's hard being friends with someone who won't cover your shifts, or leaves you in the lurch on the job. I don't want to take workplace drama home.

As a Charge Nurse, I try to avoid getting too close to the people I have to supervise, to avoid the appearance of favoritism. Being the boss's best friend has advantages, and I've been on the wrong side of that enough times.

That said, in my experience, people who say "I didn't come here to make friends" are usually trying to justify rudeness or bullying.

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I'm friendly with my co-workers, but I don't socialize with them. Workplace friendships have never worked from me. It's hard being friends with someone who won't cover your shifts, or leaves you in the lurch on the job. I don't want to take workplace drama home.

As a Charge Nurse, I try to avoid getting too close to the people I have to supervise, to avoid the appearance of favoritism. Being the boss's best friend has advantages, and I've been on the wrong side of that enough times.

That said, in my experience, people who say "I didn't come here to make friends" are usually trying to justify rudeness or bullying.

I'm not saying that I could never be real and true close personal friends with someone that I work with - anything's possible, but in my case it's probably not very likely to happen. Workplace friendships have never really worked for me either. I've been burned more often than not, and learned my lesson long ago. I am cordial, friendly, and respectful, and try to cover other's backs, and I think that's as much as anyone has a right to expect at work........ I am open to friendships, but very, very wary in a work setting. Just don't have the same level of trust I guess - a lot of places where I've worked in the past were very competitive rather than cooperative. If people want to believe that you are "upsnooty" because you don't socialize outside of work or go out of your way to try and make personal friendships, well IMO that's a small price to pay - let them think that..... That said, there's no excuse for rudeness or bullying IMO.

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I am beginning to have some good friends at work, but it's all happened naturally. We just get along and enjoy each other's company, so we do try to plan things occasionally outside of work. The problem is our schedules conflict and then our family plans conflict, so it doesn't happen often. But when it does we have a really great time.

I like being friendly to everyone, but not everyone at works seems to want to be friendly, so I just go with the flow. I like to be comfortable at work, and it makes the job a lot easier if you're on friendly terms. We can be buddies outside of work, or not -- just happy to be on friendly terms at all, as a few are extremely unfriendly and cliquish.

I just hate it to be all or nothing. I've had friends from former careers that have lasted for years, even after the job ended. Nothing wrong with that -- these folks have been some of my greatest friends in life.

At the moment, I'm dealing w/ a bully type at work, so I value the friendships I have, and I also value the relationships that are friendly. They are all a blessing, IMO, as it helps me to get through bad days and to deal w/ the bullies and trouble causers, bad managers, mean docs, and so on.

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