File this one under "things I think but won't say"...

Nurses General Nursing Toon

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Ahuh. Yeah. Ugh. What do you think? ?

Specializes in ICU.
Libby1987 said:
That people who couldn't/wouldn't perform good self care seem to be the ones who, or their family members, have the hardest time accepting the inevitable. Why didn't they start fighting back when it might have made a difference?

This.

Had a COPDer recently who was totally BiPAP dependent, immediately dropped her sats into the 60s every time she took the mask off, grab my arm and plead, "Don't let me die!" I felt bad for her, but at the same time, I really wanted to say, "It's way too late for anyone to save you now." What do people expect when they're told they're going to die if they keep up their current behavior, and they keep that behavior anyway? It doesn't seem like it's rocket science to figure out how that's going to go.

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Specializes in ORTHO, PCU, ED.

"You're not the only pt in this hospital so quit actin' like it"

"If you have had such terrible experiences here why did you come? There's an AWESOME hospital 5 miles down the road." *Hands AMA form*

"You really aren't in THAT much pain. You just like drugs."

"If you're having such severe abdominal pain and need your Dilaudid every hour, then quit begging me to call the doctor and order you a regular diet.":no:

"I'm your nurse not your punchin' bag."

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Specializes in Palliative, Onc, Med-Surg, Home Hospice.
CBlover said:
"You're not the only pt in this hospital so quit actin' like it"

I have actually said this to a long termer with narcissistic personality disorder. A lot! Not any of the frequent flyers though.

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Specializes in kids.
Farawyn said:
Dude.

Don't even feed the troll....

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Specializes in School Nursing, Hospice,Med-Surg.

"Aw, geez. Not THIS KID again!"

-thought by every school nurse every day when that oh-so-special frequent flyer is back again

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Specializes in Labor and Delivery.

Obnoxious Family member: Excuse me Nurse ____, could you grab me a soda?

Other obnoxious family member: "Yeah, me too!"

Things I think but don't say to family members: "I am NOT a waitress and this is not a resturant/hotel. If you want a soda, you can take your a$$ to the convenience store up the street."

Things I say instead (with a smile) "There's is actually a vending machine just down the hallway. It has a great selection of snacks and drinks" lol.

Scenario: Patient Oriented x's 4, ambulatory or ambulatory w/ assistance requests a bed pan or wants me to give them a full bed bath.

Things I think but won't say: "You are not a baby. If you can walk, you can get to the commode and take care of your business. I'm not gonna wipe your over-grown behind because you don't feel like getting up and walking 6 feet to a toilet or shower."

Things I say instead with a smile: "It would be a great idea for you to get out of the bed and ambulate to the restroom. If you need help getting there, please call and either myself or an aide will be in to assist you."

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You're having this much pain after a stent removal because you're a (beep) heroin addict and no amount of pain medication can help you. I did say something like this to the patient, basically saying it would take time for the pain level to get better because of his "condition". When the patient and wife asked "What do you mean?", I didn't say anything.

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"Things I think but won't say"

You are such an a-hole! I can't believe you said that this time!

(to my superior)

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When a completely alert and oriented patient rings because they want the head of their bed adjusted.

What I wish I could say: "Are you kidding me?!"

What I actually say: "These buttons right here on the inside of the bed rail are for you to adjust your bed with."

Once I had a patient whine "But I can't reach them!"

*facepalm*

Well, picking up your arm might be a possible solution.

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Yes, the world is full of crazy people--and sometimes it feels like they're all in your ER.

Seriously, though, the way some people let it all hang out (literally and figuratively) when they're in crisis mode really does humble me. When the S$#+ hits the fan, people really do tell it like it is.

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Oh! I've said this out loud (to friends, family and Co-workers) MANY times!!

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Specializes in Medical Surgical.

To my obese, current smoker patient who asks when will she be able to tolerate getting out of bed without getting so winded. "Maybe when you lose some weight and quit smoking."

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