Good evening. I've been a member of Allnurses since last year. It has helped guide me through my prenursing journey to acceptance into the competitive ADN program I applied to. I worked hard, through last summer all of the way through this previous spring semester to achieve the 3.6 gpa I have. I scored in the 99th percentile on the Pax-Rn. I was very proud to get accepted into the AND program I applied to.
Well, it just so happens that, this previous January during thr spring semester, I lost my job that I had been on for 7 years. I was devastated. I had given that job much of myself, and they just threw me away like a piece of trash. I applied for unemployment, which I was approved for. I've obviously encountered some financial hardship since, being that my unemployment is less than half of what I was making.
After no luck finding a job, I went ahead and enrolled full-time this summer. This made me a trainee as far as the Dept of Labor said, which means that I was to cease my work search and concntrate on my studies. I began to look at what happened with my job as possibly a blessing in disguise, as I would have had to probably leave anyway once the nursing program started.
The problem I'm encountering is my family. Both of my sisters are not supportive at all. They call me lazy....say I'm too sorry to work. I've worked since I was 16 (I'm now 29), oftentimes two jobs. The job that I lost...I was salaried, working close to 60 hrs/wk. I thought the circumstances lined up perfectly for me to pursue my dream of being in nursing.
They constantly make me feel like crap. They talk about me to other members of my family. They say "they went to work and went to school....you can too". They don't realize that I did as well when I was younger, maintaining almost 4.0gpa while doing so for two years.
Nursing school is very unique: they don't understand that, for most, they can't work while in RN school at all. At best, some manage to hold down a part time job. Most don't work at all. They faculty even advises us not to work. Working a part time job wouldn't even pay me more than I receive with my benefits.
The only people that have supported me are my parents. My mother is a nurse, and she understands the rigors of nursing school. She told me she thought I made an excellent choice, making a short-term sacrifice for long-term security and happiness. My father also supported me, telling me that it was time I went for it, doing something for a living that was a rewarding and that I could actually enjoy somewhat. Sadly, he passed away last month.
Now, I'm still excited. I can't wait for school to start this fall. My mother continues to support me, as well as my friends. However, I can't help but feel discouraged at times when some of my family feels like they do about me. Well, sorry for the long post. Just needed to vent. I'm gonna stay the course and do the best I can.Anyone else encountered anything similar?
Have you considered not going into nursing because if you can't take a little bit of heat from your family, I wonder how cut out you will be taking heat from your nursing manager, nursing peer group, and the patients. You may want to reconsider another career path in my opinion.
Please...I punched through my pre reqs, holding a 3.6 gpa while scoring damn near perfect on the Pax-Rn, while working almost 60 hours per week and having my son every other week. I know I can do anything I put my damn mind to. Nothing's wrong with wanting a little support...
I so cannot believe that someone actually voiced their opinion telling you to reconsider Don't even get ruffled over that! You've got your mom and your sisters will come around. If not, does it really matter? I think having a nurse for a mother would mean you did/will get some good advice and support.
Although you lost your job suddenly, other doors were opened for you. Keep the faith and maybe you can let your sisters know that this hasn't been so easy for you and you're doing what you feel is best for you and really would like their support. Once they hear you value them, they may just hop on board. It was a great path for me and having worked in a factory before beginning healthcare way back when, I can honestly say that I wouldn't be discouraging anyone.
Specializes in Emergent pre-hospital care as a medic.
"dear sister,
I found your nose...it was all up in my business"
Seriously sounds like they need a firm reminder that you didn't ask for their input as to what you "should" be doing. I have no problem distancing myself from negativity even if it's family. I've found this to be a valuable asset in my personal toolbox. They do sound jealous and ignorant to the rigors of nursing requirements. You do you and let them do them. Lean on your mom, if she's supportive and you have friends who are supportive you can easily disregard 2 jealous hens for a while.
My family is supportive, but I'm not sure if they believe in me....They sometimes ask me questions like "are you still interested in nursing" "are you still sure that's what you want to do?" UMmmm YEAAA!! I've been in school for 2 yrs, and I want this more then ever! I'm also studying for the nurse entrance exam right now, and I don't think they realize how serious this is for me, and How this entrance exam will finally start my nursing journey! Anyways, don't feel discouraged, as I try not to let them discourage me. Like my father always said,"don't look behind or sideways, keep your face forward, and keep moving forward, don't worry about anyone else, just keep moving forward" Best of luck to you!
i always taught my kids that making somebody else feel smaller is no way to make yourself feel bigger. i also told them that it's stupid to spend time around people who want to make you feel bad. when they grew up they realized that i had been talking about why i divorced their father, without ever mentioning him once.
you can "divorce" your sisters. might be a good idea for your kid, too.
i always taught my kids that making somebody else feel smaller is no way to make yourself feel bigger. i also told them that it's stupid to spend time around people who want to make you feel bad. when they grew up they realized that i had been talking about why i divorced their father, without ever mentioning him once.
you can "divorce" your sisters. might be a good idea for your kid, too.
I have also been going through the prerequisite process for an ADN program over the last year. I'm hoping to be accepted for fall. My parents have been kind of weird about my decision to pursue nursing. It may be because I just completed a Bachelor's in a different field about 2 years ago and am pursuing something completely different so soon. Or maybe because I'm getting married in October, which would be right in the middle of first semester. Regardless, it's been a little rough not feeling like my parents are fully on my side. When I contemplated quitting my job recently to focus on my fast-paced summer classes, I was basically told I should quit the classes instead.
I think it's great that you have mom supporting your decision (and I'm sorry for the loss of your father), especially because she is a nurse herself. Like some others have said, it often comes down to sibling rivalry or jealously sometimes even when you least expect it.
Who in the world forces you to listen to things which make you feeling like crap? Just stop talking with dear sis's, and go on with YOUR life, that's it. Listen instead to whoever supports you and whom you trust.
(P.S. on the other hand, learning how to live with people who treat you like dirt while saving your dignity and compassion would be proven priceless in your nursing career. It is never included in resumes, but actually worths way more than celebrated "computer skills". It is not an opportunity easy to embrace and enjoy, but it will pay back big one day).
Was in Information Technology for 12 years. The market went bust. I took a job making 50% less and working 60 hrs/wk. Finally, after going to ER for chest pain (dx: panic attack), I decided to do something different. I went into nursing! LOL... and I thought it would be less stressful than I.T...
I didn't work while in nursing school. It was stressful on my marriage - neither my husband or myself had any clue what we were in for - even though we researched it. Yikes! I did hear about it - again and again from him about me not working, him supporting the "entire project"... even though we both agreed on the career change and me not working while in nursing school.
It got so bad that we separated while I was in nursing school. Ugh. Obviously not fun. But - I had peace and quiet to study. I got through school, we got back together right around graduation/pinning. Since that time I've gotten my BSN and am currently in wound care school. I just enrolled in a Master's program at a local university.
Yes - he and I are still together :-) I attribute this, in part, due to our knowledge of what nursing is - and isn't, and what is required when pursuing additional education in this field.
As to your sensitivity to what your siblings are saying - well - it's been my experience that those that haven't been in nursing school just do not understand what that means or what it entails. Lazy? BWAH-HAHAHA! I laughed in their faces - maniacally - when it was implied that I was a "lady of leisure"...and not working while in school. At first I was way too sensitive, but eventually learned how to sharpen my wit... er, uh... sarcasm. I still succumb to it now in certain conversations... LOL...
I guess what I'm saying is, if you want this, do it. No one knows your financial/career plan better than you - or the requirements and commitments it will take to get you there. And, frankly, is it really any of their business? Just a thought.
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Don't even get ruffled over that! You've got your mom and your sisters will come around. If not, does it really matter? I think having a nurse for a mother would mean you did/will get some good advice and support. 
Jc1982
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