In a couple of weeks, my colleague will be out on vacation (and deservedly so). This means, however, my workload will basically double. Instead of overseeing 28 patients, I'll be responsible for 56.
I don't forsee this as going successfully. In my opinion, they're probably better off with no manager at all than having me there. Patients are going to need things I can't give and families are going to have questions I can't answer. There are going to be things that come up that my colleague is better suited to handle that will ultimately fall on me.
One example would be is that there is a Care Conference scheduled for a patient that my colleague would normally oversee. This patient has a new urostomy; I am anticipating the patient and/or family may have questions regarding this. However, this is not one of my areas of expertise and something someone else should address. In my opinion, this patient and family are better off having no nurse attend at all than having someone like myself there. I am tempted to not show up to work that day as a result.
In fact, I've thought about simply not coming in at all that week. I simply won't be successful in managing so many patients and strongly believe my coworkers, patients and family members will be better off if I am not there. This obviously means no manager, but it's better than having me there.
The trick, then, is how do I pursue not coming in that week? How do you excuse yourself from work, knowing fully well someone else is on vacation?
I guess a question might be: Is it preferable to have (a) no manager around or (b) an unintelligent manager around?
Thing is, I can be of good use if there is a second manager. As a solo manager, I'm not such a good person to have around.
If you are questioning your competence in your position, why do you stay? Reading your posts, and your lack of confidence, I am concerned for the patients if what you are saying is true, or is this a form of attention seeking behavior? I see a common thread in all of your posts, it's kind of a "woe is me" kind of theme. But if you truly feel incompetent, you need to find another job. I am not trying to sound harsh. I'm just trying to be honest, and I simply don't know how to put it any other way.
I am also appalled that you would even consider calling in sick the week your colleague is on vacation simply because of a single conference. I've seen some pretty good suggestions here for you that would minimize your interaction at the meeting, simply be there to observe, take notes and questions while the other manager is out of town. Leaving the unit without a manager for that reason is unprofessional, as well as selfish. If you were terminated for it, you would deserve it.
Silverbells, you need to pick yourself up by your bootstraps, and change your attitude. You are so incredibly negative. Is there anything about nursing, maybe another specialty that makes you happy, or that you feel comfortable in? If so, you need to go back to that. This negativity is so unhealthy. Good luck, and again, I am not trying to be harsh, just honest.
Specializes in Community Health, Med/Surg, ICU Stepdown.
I agree, it’s OK (and for the best) to admit it if you’re not feeling competent in your job, whether due to mental health issues or something else. But once you’ve admitted it to yourself you need to take the next steps and take a leave of absence to see if you can come back and work competently (if that’s your goal), or resign. There is no shame in not being capable of doing a job, but it’s not right to continue working there once you realize this. I am speaking from personal recent experience, so I totally feel for you and I hope you can take a pause to get the help you need, for yourself and for your patients ?
I would agree that, generally, the first statement can be helpful in certain circumstances. Unfortunately, I don't foresee this as working during the week my colleague is gone, as I am certain that some patients/families will have questions or concerns that they aren't going to want to wait 5 days for answers to or resolution for. More than likely, the social worker is going to identify that a patient needs education on a certain topic during that week, and it will likely be on a topic that I'm not well equipped to address. For example, my fear is that the patient with the urostomy might end up discharging the week my colleague is gone and more than likely need urostomy education going home since it is new for them. I do not feel comfortable providing this education and, in normal circumstances, would have my colleague do it. Not showing up to work would ensure that I have no involvement with this task. I am not sure who would address it, but this would force them to find someone better equipped to do so.
Basically, my fear is that clinical issues will present themselves that I am not familiar with. In such circumstances, my colleague has proven to do a much better job in resolving such instances as he is very knowledgeable. However, I won't have him around as a resource during this week and I'm not sure I can resolve any of them on my own.
Sounds to me like you're planning ahead to fail, instead of planning ahead to succeed. The only actually appropriate options are to resign and leave, which will probably screw over your coworker's vacation altogether and be a jackass move, or to connect with your coworker now, learn about the things that you feel unequipped to deal with, and read up on the things you are lacking.
If you are so useless as a manager that you can only tag along behind someone else, are unwilling or incapable of planning and learning and broadening your horizons, and are unable to do any work on your own, you should resign and find a job you are competent at. Nobody needs an incompetent manager. If having no manager is better than having you, then you should be doing a different job. And as a nurse, I loathe working with managers who are ignorant and too lazy to do anything about it.
You don't have to do everything perfectly with twice your normal workload...but you do need to continue to be a professional and do your best, and find solutions for the things you cannot do.
But seriously, a urostomy is something that RNs provide education about at the hospital all the time, and we do not have special qualifications to do so. You read the patient education materials, learn what you're supposed to be teaching, maybe watch a Youtube video or two, and figure it out. It's not that hard, and you should be fully capable of figuring it out if you managed to make it through nursing school. If you already know you may need to provide a patient with additional information about his urostomy, you can start figuring that out now, in advance of your colleague's departure on vacation.
I would suggest to study the areas you are not 100% comfortable in, so that you an be a better nurse for your patients, and a better colleague for your coworkers
I logged in after like a year just to comment on this having received this in the Allnurses email sendout.
I honestly cannot believe you would even consider calling out as an option being that your staff, patients and Co manager depend on you. Why are you even in that position if you can't handle it? Are you so scared of failure and your own incompetence that you'd just leave everyone in the lurch? Over a urostomy?? Google how to take care of one! Print out the patient education information you give to patients upon discharge and read over it. Bam, you're educated.
You need better problem solving skills, and if you can't figure that out, you need to resign and allow a more qualified manager to step in. Yikes.
Reading through most pages of this post (I skipped a few), one area is not clear to me. Does the other area not have a shift charge nurse and reasonably competent staff? If so, they should only need you to check in a few times a shift as they are familiar with the patient loads, acuity and how to run the unit. Leave them your phone number for emergencies and respond(!) if they call you.
Of course managers cover for each other. it is an expectation. In my experience, the charge nurses and staff nurses were excellent problem solvers and generally needed to go to a higher authority for the token odd things or staffing issues. A week is not huge. Try covering for a 6 week medical leave!
If you call off, I can guarantee you will not earn points from the other manager OR from YOUR boss. If responsibility scares you or you are afraid of making a mistake, leadership is not for you at this point in your career.
I hope your own staff respect you and your leadership style. If you are micromanaging them to the point where everything has to be confirmed and approved by you, it will take a toll on you them and you.
Of note: It is not just the Care Conference or urostomy that is causing me anxiety. It's the fact that there are EIGHTEEN to TWENTY discharges alone scheduled for next week. We've never had this many discharges with the two of us around, let alone just one. Usually it is, at most, 10 between the two of us. Six of them are scheduled for one day. This also means the number of admissions will be unbearable. In fact, we have SIX admissions scheduled for Monday alone. Our providers only see patients via telehealth, so I'll have to attend all of them as well. These alone can take upwards of 90 minutes out of each day. There are at least 10 Care Conferences I'll be expected to attend. All of this doesn't include all of the acute issues or staffing issues that will come up. In reality, none of these tasks individually are that difficult. However, when you add them all up, it becomes an overwhelmingly impossible workload, so yes, I do worry about making mistakes. Even with excellent planning, it will be an extremely challenging week.
Of note: It is not just the Care Conference or urostomy that is causing me anxiety. It's the fact that there are EIGHTEEN to TWENTY discharges alone scheduled for next week. We've never had this many discharges with the two of us around, let alone just one. Usually it is, at most, 10 between the two of us. Six of them are scheduled for one day. This also means the number of admissions will be unbearable. In fact, we have SIX admissions scheduled for Monday alone. Our providers only see patients via telehealth, so I'll have to attend all of them as well. These alone can take upwards of 90 minutes out of each day. There are at least 10 Care Conferences I'll be expected to attend. All of this doesn't include all of the acute issues or staffing issues that will come up. In reality, none of these tasks individually are that difficult. However, when you add them all up, it becomes an overwhelmingly impossible workload, so yes, I do worry about making mistakes. Even with excellent planning, it will be an extremely challenging week.
The thing to do is speak up to the higher admin before this happens to come up with a game plan. Doesn't the individual patient nurses do admission or discharges? Something will need to give as one person can't do all that in one day. You will have to be assertive and if the higher ups fail to offer assistance, your only sane choice may be resigning.
Many of us have urged you to resign for many months rather than be overworked and put in an untenable position, but for some unknown reason you have chosen to stay. Frankly I would have left the job a long time again when admin refused to help you on all the previous times you were put in an impossible situation. But as long as you keep coming to work things will not improve. They will just expect you will keep working 20 plus hours, whatever it takes. You complain to us about the situation and the insane hours you have been willing to work that you appear to wear as a badge of honor. When you are willing to be a sacrificial lamb working insane hours on salary what incentive do they have to hire more staff and change things? You alone have to make the bold step of setting limits and/or resigning. We can't do it for you and it appears your admin have already let you know they don't care or respect you and won't do anything to fix this insane situation.
What will happen if you call in? Who will end up doing the admits and discharges? If you already know the answer than you need to bring up the need to delegate it and be ready and willing to resign if you are refused! It would be better to resign than just take the coward's way out by calling in all week. It is passive aggressive and will only reinforce your fears, anxiety and lack of confidence. But if you do it, they may well put an end to your misery and fire you. Resigning is the professional thing to do if you can't reach common ground and compromise. You should have spoken up long before now so you could give your two weeks in a timely fashion.
Conversely if you firmly stand your ground and let them know this is a deal breaker or you will resign immediately, they may capitulate rather than be left doing your job for the week. Maybe that needs to happen for real change because I'm sure they will not be willing to do your job as manager and staff nurse putting in insane hours indefinitely while they look for your replacement. I have a feeling that might open their purse strings to hire more than just one manager to do the job.
You guys with all your earnest suggestions are so adorable.
Hopefully they’ll realize soon enough that SilverBells plays the role of a victim with insurmountable problems and that she has zero intentions or interests in changing her situation.
These genuine advice from well meaning posters might as well be them talking to a wall.
I basically read this as "if my co-manager isn't there then I'm not effective as a manager".
The fact that you're considering calling out and leaving no manager in place instead of stepping up and performing your duties and having your co-manager brief/update you on any pending issues/meetings/concerns etc. would support your own opinion.
I would really, really re-consider whether or not management is for you and start trying to find out what your co-workers honestly think of you as a manager.
It may just be time, and in everyone's best interest, to move on and let someone else better qualified take over if your introspection and "straw poll" of your co-workers supports your initial supposition
beachynurse, ASN, BSN
463 Posts
If you are questioning your competence in your position, why do you stay? Reading your posts, and your lack of confidence, I am concerned for the patients if what you are saying is true, or is this a form of attention seeking behavior? I see a common thread in all of your posts, it's kind of a "woe is me" kind of theme. But if you truly feel incompetent, you need to find another job. I am not trying to sound harsh. I'm just trying to be honest, and I simply don't know how to put it any other way.
I am also appalled that you would even consider calling in sick the week your colleague is on vacation simply because of a single conference. I've seen some pretty good suggestions here for you that would minimize your interaction at the meeting, simply be there to observe, take notes and questions while the other manager is out of town. Leaving the unit without a manager for that reason is unprofessional, as well as selfish. If you were terminated for it, you would deserve it.
Silverbells, you need to pick yourself up by your bootstraps, and change your attitude. You are so incredibly negative. Is there anything about nursing, maybe another specialty that makes you happy, or that you feel comfortable in? If so, you need to go back to that. This negativity is so unhealthy. Good luck, and again, I am not trying to be harsh, just honest.