I got into a debate with a high school friend on FB (I have since hidden his posts since I can't see his politics without raising my blood pressure) about this last summer.
I posted a link to an article about a girl sent home because she was wearing a sundress with spaghetti straps. Yes, she was out of dress code, but my point was that the dress code is overly restrictive and leads to body shaming for young women.
His argument was that men are biologically hard wired to look at women's bodies.
My argument was that why are we teaching our young women that they need to cover up instead of teaching our young men not to ogle.
I lost him when I asked "At what point does the man assume responsibility? When a young woman is on the stand being asked what she was wearing and if she'd been drinking?" He didn't see the connection.
FLIP FLOPS>>>>>>>>>> Oh. how. I. hate. them. in my. schools.!
I hate dealing with dirty foot injuries. No matter how many times I tell them to wear something that cover their feet, they keep coming back with issues. AHHHHH!
Specializes in Cardiology, Cardiothoracic Surgical.
I don't remember this being a problem for me in high school (late 90s). Everyone was into oversized clothing so we must have missed the opportunity to dress like hookers. Or we had the common sense to take a cardigan or flannel for over our tank tops.
That being said, I support a business casual dress code for students these days. Maybe not uniforms, but it keeps it classy and teaches the students how to dress for a professional environment later in life. It's not terribly difficult for girls and young women to find capris or slacks, button down shirts or sweaters, and decent hard soled shoes.
I don't remember this being a problem for me in high school (late 90s). Everyone was into oversized clothing so we must have missed the opportunity to dress like hookers. Or we had the common sense to take a cardigan or flannel for over our tank tops.
I graduated HS in 1998 and tank tops were well within dress code.
I hate the argument that dress codes shame girls. I think It's ridiculous. Boys generally don't wear spaghetti straps or short shorts to school so they're not gonna get dinged for it. They should be banned from showing boxers and wearing those tank tops that show their sides and most schools do ban those in the dress code.
And the idea that boys shouldn't look at girls who have their assets hanging out is also ridiculous. If you come out in public with something on display, the public has the right to look at it. If a good looking man comes out with no shirt or no pants, I'm probably gonna sneak a peek. I don't expect teenage boys to be any different. When i was 18, I didn't wear short denim shorts and crop tops for comfort, I wore them cause I thought I looked sexy and I wanted the boys to look. I don't believe any girl who tells me that type of outfit is for comfort. Cotton Bermudas are much more comfortable but I don't see young girls lining up for a pair. I don't think it's abnormal for teenage girls to want to look sexy and I don't think it's abnormal for the boys to admire but it's not appropriate for school.
And the idea that boys shouldn't look at girls who have their assets hanging out is also ridiculous. If you come out in public with something on display, the public has the right to look at it. If a good looking man comes out with no shirt or no pants, I'm probably gonna sneak a peek. I don't expect teenage boys to be any different. When i was 18, I didn't wear short denim shorts and crop tops for comfort, I wore them cause I thought I looked sexy and I wanted the boys to look. I don't believe any girl who tells me that type of outfit is for comfort. Cotton Bermudas are much more comfortable but I don't see young girls lining up for a pair. I don't think it's abnormal for teenage girls to want to look sexy and I don't think it's abnormal for the boys to admire but it's not appropriate for school.
I don't agree with the implication that boys are simply "sneaking a peek" at girls who are dressed "provocatively." I do agree with your sentiment that people will look at something that's out of the ordinary though. However, I do think we should absolutely be teaching boys that they don't get to gawk or leer at girls for any reason. Whether or not girls are dressing that way for attention, not all of them all, and to imply so is incorrect. Teach the boys to "sneak a peak" and not stare, and you're honestly on the road to polite society.
I don't think it's abnormal for teenage girls to want to look sexy and I don't think it's abnormal for the boys to admire but it's not appropriate for school.
I disagree with the use of "admire." I don't think the general boys are "admiring" girls so much as sexualizing them and degrading them based on their appearance and with the approval of the school staff. There's no reverence or respect in the use of "admire". And once again the onus is on the girls to predict and mitigate the action of boys. Just because something is "normal" doesn't mean that as a society we shouldn't try and fix the problem.
I do feel that I have to say that I agree that first and secondary sexual organs/characteristics should be covered on both sexes. I just think we go overboard, and I think we do focus on girls and their actions and put more burden on them. That may just be how society is at the moment, but that doesn't mean that it's OK.
I'm confused by this. Are you saying that boys can wear spaghetti strapped shirts and sundresses? My kids dress code is the same across the board. Sleeveless shirts must have dollar bill width straps, shorts/skirts have to be within so far from the knee, no clothes that are see through when you bend over.
In my day, guys were not allowed ear rings or other piercings that the girls were allowed. No screamed sexism back then.
I'm confused by this. Are you saying that boys can wear spaghetti strapped shirts and sundresses? My kids dress code is the same across the board. Sleeveless shirts must have dollar bill width straps, shorts/skirts have to be within so far from the knee, no clothes that are see through when you bend over.
In my day, guys were not allowed ear rings or other piercings that the girls were allowed. No screamed sexism back then.
No, I'm saying that the dress codes are set up with male clothing as the norm which creates a system for girls to be targeted (unconsciously, I believe, but makes it no better) which perpetrates certain myths. Boys don't wear spaghetti straps and sundresses because they are conditioned not to by our current society. There's no right or wrong to that aspect; that's just fashion as it is today in our society. But, I would put money on the fact that if spaghetti straps were a staple in male fashion they would not be against the dress codes.
And, it was sexist to not allow boys to wear piercings that girls wear. It doesn't matter that nobody "screamed sexism" back then. We have to learn and grow as a society, right?
I'm confused by this. Are you saying that boys can wear spaghetti strapped shirts and sundresses? My kids dress code is the same across the board. Sleeveless shirts must have dollar bill width straps, shorts/skirts have to be within so far from the knee, no clothes that are see through when you bend over.
In my day, guys were not allowed ear rings or other piercings that the girls were allowed. No screamed sexism back then.
Yea, things have changed. We are more aware of sexism facing both sexes. Guys are allowed to wear dresses if they so choose. We've come a long way.
That being said, I think sexism and school dress code are 2 different things. My issues are underwear and private parts showing.
MrNurse(x2), ADN
2,558 Posts
I hate dealing with dirty foot injuries. No matter how many times I tell them to wear something that cover their feet, they keep coming back with issues. AHHHHH!