Does your supervisor give a crap?

My vent:

Saturday my husband was brought my squad to MY ER while I was working for a serious avulsion to his ticep involving artery, nerve, tendon, muscle, and tissue. I worked day shift and was oncall for the afternoon shift the same day while they took him for emergency surgery.

My supervisor NEVER voiced concern or even talked to me about whether I would want to go sit in Surgical Family Waiting while my husband was in surgery. Nor did she ever say a word about getting coverage for my oncall or even the next day Sunday (7/3p) when he was to be discharged.

I spent the 2.5 hours while my husband was in surgery calling every nurse that works there to try and cover my shift. By 1030pm that night I quit calling only getting the first 4 covered. Not one time during that whole episode did my PCS ever talk to me. Actually when I approached her about getting the 7-11am covered, she never even looked me in the face when I was talking to her.

I am so hurt and upset at this.....I have worked there 11 years!!!

Trauma,

I'm so sorry this happened to you and your husband. I would report your supervisor to administration. The way she behaved is totally unacceptable.

I agree. And make sure you ask for some time off from work for your husband's recovery.

My vent:

Saturday my husband was brought my squad to MY ER while I was working for a serious avulsion to his ticep involving artery, nerve, tendon, muscle, and tissue. I worked day shift and was oncall for the afternoon shift the same day while they took him for emergency surgery.

My supervisor NEVER voiced concern or even talked to me about whether I would want to go sit in Surgical Family Waiting while my husband was in surgery. Nor did she ever say a word about getting coverage for my oncall or even the next day Sunday (7/3p) when he was to be discharged.

I spent the 2.5 hours while my husband was in surgery calling every nurse that works there to try and cover my shift. By 1030pm that night I quit calling only getting the first 4 covered. Not one time during that whole episode did my PCS ever talk to me. Actually when I approached her about getting the 7-11am covered, she never even looked me in the face when I was talking to her.

I am so hurt and upset at this.....I have worked there 11 years!!!

First let me say best wishes to your hubby and here is hoping he will makes a complete recovery. Secondly, let me say I personally have never been treated this badly. However, I have had people tell me stories like this, some almost duplicates of your story. For instance, I had a unit secretary in tears tell me that for the 6 months her mother was dying of cancer her manager never asked how her mother was or offered assistance as far as scheduling. The managers only concern was how it was going to affect the employees attendance. When my friend's mother finally died, the manager never said one word of sympathy. This unit secretary worked on this manager's unit for 13 years. So you are not the only person that has had this experience. Like I said, sorry to hear that.

Wow! I would feel terrible if I was treated that way. If it were me, I'd say to my manager that I'm no longer on call and to find her own coverage. What a crappy manager!

So, is your husband ok?

I agree. And make sure you ask for some time off from work for your husband's recovery.

This is, of course, what any decent employer would do. But given the OP's description of her supervisor's non-response on the afternoon her husband was injured, I doubt it will happen voluntarily.

Keep in mind that FMLA allows leave time for the care of immediate family members. Consider asking your husband's physician to fill out the forms if you think you will need time off.

Best to you both!

Thanks everyone for your support. I'm still fuming about this. I sent an email to my manager about my feelings today....no response yet.

Oh and btw: My husband is home, a bit cranky as expected. He is in a half cast from bicep to fingers and will f/u with surgeon sometime next week. The surgeon told me he will be in rehabilitation for over a year as the nerve grows 1mm per day and does not gaurante he will ever regain feeling in his 3rd, 4th and 5th digits, so say a prayer he does. I gota tell ya, helping him, bathe, dress, etc. is gonna make me his private duty nurse for a long time...lol. Again, thanks for the support.

this is pretty standard fare, at least in my personal experience. that doesn't mean it's right or that you should not be upset. however, just keep in mind that the manager's job is to run the er, not care about her workers or be decent to them. she is not paid for caring about and taking care of her employees. she is paid to please her bosses. harsh reality of life and i'm sorry she is apparently uncaring. i do hope your husband is doing well. btw, yes, i think managers would do well to show care and common decency for their workers, not be stonehearted. but i no longer expect this kindness. i understand that i am a small, non-vital cog in a giant wheel and i am easily replaced -& won't really be missed if i'm gone. yes, i get along well with my boss and coworkers but it's still a job, a business, and i'm just an employee.

in the future, just tell her you need to leave, as you are too upset to safely care for patients. the point is, don't ask. tell.

by all means, get fmla. or just tell your boss you need a couple of days off to care for your husband. i wonder how she will respond to your email. good for you (i hope) for speaking up and letting her know how you feel. i hope there's no negative fallout.

I am so sorry to hear how poorly you manager treated you. It sounds like your manager needs to find a new line of work because she acts like she does not care about her employees. Like the OP stated you need to look into FMLA. If she acted this way when you asked for help getting your on call covered how do you think she is going to act when you ask off to take him to doctors appts or rehab.? Protect your job at all cost.

Be sure to take care of yourself as well as your husband during this difficult time.

Totally agree with Vito's post.

To answer the original question ... no, I don't think my supervisor gives a crap. My supervisor's function is not to give a crap ... it's to run the department.

That being said ... a wise manager will realize early in the management game that he/she has been charged with managing people, and people will predictably have various life crises at regular intervals. People generally react badly when they feel that other people don't give a crap. Wise managers realize this, and factor in at least the appearance of doing the "right thing" to ensure the smooth running of the department.

:angryfireBurn her at the stake:angryfire

Totally agree with Vito's post.

To answer the original question ... no, I don't think my supervisor gives a crap. My supervisor's function is not to give a crap ... it's to run the department.

That being said ... a wise manager will realize early in the management game that he/she has been charged with managing people, and people will predictably have various life crises at regular intervals. People generally react badly when they feel that other people don't give a crap. Wise managers realize this, and factor in at least the appearance of doing the "right thing" to ensure the smooth running of the department.

Well said ^. To the OP glad your husband is doing better. If I had been in your situation I would not have reacted nicely, my family comes first....period.

Cam

I bet it would be a different story if it was her husband. God forbid she would put on a pair of scrubs and cover you for a few hours. I had a friend who lost both parents in a matter of 2 weeks and her manager never even said a single word to her. It wasn't until someone said something to her that she did not acknowledge this nurse's parents death that she finally said she was sorry to the nurse. I feel that manager's have to acknowledge that nurses have lives with families and that sometimes **** happens and you need to take care of your family.