Does Grief Counseling hurt people?

[FireStarterRN, BSN, RN]

I've always thought that this whole grief counseling business was ridiculous. Whenever there's a tragedy, grief counselors are rushed to the scene. It just seems like even ancient people knew how to handle grief through their cultural process and then move on with life.

Here's an article that suggests that grief counselors actually impede people and make them less self-reliant. But, that's probably what the psychological industry wants, is for people to rely on them, then they have more clients.

http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qn4155/is_20060319/ai_n16213185

What do you think? If this is posted in the wrong section, maybe the moderators can move it.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

That's like saying doctors and nurses deliberately don't get people well because we want jobs, so I can't agree with you there. I think they mean well.

Otherwise I don't have an opinion on this topic. :)

[MedicalLPN, LPN]

Have to respectfully disagree with you, if I wouldn't have gotten therapy after I found my mother dead when I was 16 I'd be a lot worse off than I am now. Just my 2 cents.

[jjjoy, LPN]

This piece of info - that "grief counseling hurts more than helps" apparently was based on a small, unpublished grad student study that got quoted and requoted until it became a "known" fact. When folks went looking for the original source of this factoid, they found that hard evidence was lacking.

I think treatment of any sort can inadvertedly be negative and counterproductive to some percentage of the population. That doesn't necessarily mean that it should be tossed out completely or considered "dangerous."

[leslie :-D]

our grief counsellors are awesome.

they recognize that everyone has different coping mechanisms, and that different segments of the population, have different needs.

for instance, many of our elderly do well after their loved one dies.

many even make pacts to see ea other soon. (no, not talking about suicide)

but it's the people who lose a loved one at a younger age, are the ones who really benefit from this counselling.

but it really is helpful, when the therapist is tops in their field.

as in any other profession, there are quacks out there.

leslie

[danissa, LPN, LVN]

Sometimes its easier for people grieving to let go to strangers, rather than others who may be grieving as well. its a fear of making the other persons hurt worse, maintaining a "stiff upper lip thing". So, respectfully, I Do think grief counsellors have their place, just to let a person offload their feelings to someone they wont hurt is beneficial.

[teeituptom, BSN, RN]

I think grief counseling is beneficial for all concerned

I dont ever need it, but its good for everyone else.

[Curious1alwys, BSN, RN]

Wow, that is quite a different perspective!

Maybe they are thinking that counseling brings you to a state of "learned helplessness" or possibly makes you focus more on your problems? Jeez, I'd say that would be more true of couseling outside of grief because everyone knows the only way to get over grief is THROUGH it, which means you have to feel the pain. And grief counseling is great for this.

I, too, respectfully disagree. I think when it comes to grief, the more focused you are on your pain while it is still fresh, the quicker you will heal....with exceptions of course.

Thanks for the article. Interesting!

[EricJRN, MSN, RN]

I think that there will always be a place for psychotherapy, but when we mention counselors rushing to a scene, that may be something entirely different.

Critical incident stress management (CISM) is a model used for providing debriefing and education to prehospital providers, and sometimes hospital staff members, who are exposed to unusually stressful situations. There is recent evidence that CISM may do more harm than good. I'll see if I can find a few references.

[CaLLaCoDe, BSN, RN]

I believe in our culture too often we give little time to grieve. We what, give ourselves a month of grieving and move on speedily. This as the OP suggests is the best method. I disagree. Grief not delt with properly at the time of loss will pop up inappropriately later in life. Why, my wife had a family that subscribed to the philosophy of move on and don't deal with it. Well, that's hogwash, shame on anyone that thinks otherwise!

PS. My wife is steadily recovering from a loss (loss of her mother) hardily dealt with in childhood as an adult and that's only healthy.

PS PS Empathy is the greatest gift we can give our pts. Please examine your incentive to being in this field OP!

[junebug62]

I so agree with TeleRNer. Years ago we hung a wreath on the door, stopped our clocks, covered mirrors and wore black for a solid year. There may have been something to that. Today I see people working the day their loved one died. I know, everyone grieves differently, but

our culture has changed so much that we may need the councelors.

[Jo Dirt]

It seems like we tend to feel there has to be a fix for everything.

Counseling is not for everyone but I believe it has its place.