doctor with unprofessional personal life

Saved_by_Grace · Aug 10, 2005

As long as patient care is not affected, what she does at home is her business. I'm overweight (which I'm trying to work on) but yes my patient may see me as hypocritical if I'm trying to educate them on eating healthy. We all have our vices. So unless she is putting her patients in danger, it is her life to live as she chooses. Just my $.02

pricklypear · Aug 10, 2005

Just because a nurse (or doctor) smokes, is overweight, or has other private bad habits or issues - yet encourages good health in their patients, does not make them a hypocrite.

Mandarella · Aug 10, 2005

I too have to agree here.

When I graduated from high school...I went to work at a hospital. I was dumbfounded to learn that so many of the health care professionals have their hang-ups, smoking, drinking, cheating blah, blah, blah. That isn't what you are taught that nurses and doctors do.

I got used to it, I realised that they are also human...11 years later, sadly it doesn't phase me anymore. I do feel sorry for some of the situations I see. But it is none of my business, and I also...do not like to perpetuate the problems by gossiping. I hear the talk but that's where it ends. These individuals have enough to try to conquer and I have my own demons to battle as well.

I know it's heart wrenching sometimes, but people are people regardless of status. I can't tell you what to do, just give my opinion...which is to let it go. It's her personal life, she needs to deal with it how she knows how, right or wrong. Hopefully she will find her strength as well as her husband.

I'd say what goes on in her home, or with her family is HER business. We all have bad habits, or family members with bad habits, but that doesn't keep us from doing our job at work which is promoting health.

rambisisking · Aug 10, 2005

a doctor whom i work with is a female and she is really nice, but i know for a fact that her husband is a major alcoholic (literally drinks every waking minute) and he also smokes weed. she smokes a few cigarettes a day, but as far as i knwo she doesn't do alcohol or drugs like her husband.....should i do/say something. i don't really feel like i want to hurt her but it really bothers me that she lives like that and comes t work every day preaching about good health and care for your body... i am so torn. any comments?

Ugh!

This persons life is not only not your business but is certinally not up to your judgement. You say she lives an unprofessional life, to me that's the pot calling the kettle black. The fact that you are making her life your business is very unprofessional. She has a chance of changing the problems that plague her, the question is do you think that you will have the same possibility of changing your problems of being nosey and judgemental. I think they are just as distructive, if I knew her I would warn her about you.

barefootlady, ADN, RN · Aug 10, 2005

Judge not lest ye be judged. Unless her patients do not get safe, comprehensive care within her scope of practice, you need to butt out of her affairs.

mattsmom81 · Aug 10, 2005

I don't judge and report another professional unless what they are doing is extremely unprofessional (ie drinking on the job) adversely affects their patients, is illegal and I'm mandated to report, or imminently harmful to themselves or others.

lady_jezebel · Aug 10, 2005

a doctor whom i work with is a female and she is really nice, but i know for a fact that her husband is a major alcoholic (literally drinks every waking minute) and he also smokes weed. she smokes a few cigarettes a day, but as far as i knwo she doesn't do alcohol or drugs like her husband.....should i do/say something. i don't really feel like i want to hurt her but it really bothers me that she lives like that and comes t work every day preaching about good health and care for your body... i am so torn. any comments?

it's none of your business. on what grounds would you do anything? she's not endangering patients.

LydiaNN · Aug 10, 2005

I am wondering what you think might be appropriate to say, and to whom. The short answer to your question is "no". It really isn't any of your business. I can't imagine what would make you think that it is!

Cute_CNA, CNA · Aug 10, 2005

I'm glad you asked for advice before approaching her. I feel like I'm just repeating what everyone else is saying, but I do think it's true: it's not your place to point this out.

Unless these problems are affecting her work, it's nobody's business. And it doesn't sound like she is the one with the problem; it's her husband's problem.

Yes, this may have tainted your view of the health profession, but there is the ideal, and then there's reality. Reality is never as pretty as the ideal.

Work on yourself first and foremost. Unless she SAYS or DOES something unethical at work, there is no grounds to say anything about it.

One more thing: don't repeat what you hear about other peoples' personal lives, whether it's good or bad. Gossiping is unprofessional at best, and can get you fired at its worse. I think it creates distrust among staff, and therefore can result in a lack of cohesion and teamwork.

Thunderwolf, MSN, RN · Aug 10, 2005

I am wondering what you think might be appropriate to say, and to whom. The short answer to your question is "no". It really isn't any of your business. I can't imagine what would make you think that it is!

Totally agree.

letina · Aug 10, 2005

a doctor whom i work with is a female and she is really nice, but i know for a fact that her husband is a major alcoholic (literally drinks every waking minute) and he also smokes weed. she smokes a few cigarettes a day, but as far as i knwo she doesn't do alcohol or drugs like her husband.....should i do/say something. i don't really feel like i want to hurt her but it really bothers me that she lives like that and comes t work every day preaching about good health and care for your body... i am so torn. any comments?

This doctor deserves admiration rather than criticism. Can you imagine how difficult it must be for her to have to deal with her husband's issues then come into work and care for others, with a smile on her face? Not easy

NoCrumping · Aug 10, 2005

a doctor whom i work with is a female and she is really nice, but i know for a fact that her husband is a major alcoholic (literally drinks every waking minute) and he also smokes weed. she smokes a few cigarettes a day, but as far as i knwo she doesn't do alcohol or drugs like her husband.....should i do/say something. i don't really feel like i want to hurt her but it really bothers me that she lives like that and comes t work every day preaching about good health and care for your body... i am so torn. any comments?

I am a nurse, but often I eat oreos, along with other un- wholesome food choices, and the other day I layed out in the sun, and didnt use spf 45. On second thought, should I surrender my RN license? Are you serious? she "smokes a few cigarettes a day", and you are contemplating confronting her on being a hypocrite at work????? It has nothing to do with her delivering patient care, so why do you have a problem with it? and the facts you stated about her husband, are completely irrelevant. None of your business. Did you mean to type the DOCTOR is an alcoholic and smokes weed? Because unles you did, your question is completely puzzling to me. Sometimes I swear, people throw out these fake posts ,with fake "dilemmas", for, I dont know what reason.I cant imagine what you are so torn about? Have you never heard of a "doctor" that smokes, is overweight, doesnt eat properly, etc? They are human, ya know????? Seriously, unless you left out a ton of info in your post, I really dont get it.