I've got a couple of burrs under my saddle blanket and am requesting feedback from the allnurses community regarding professional behaviors:
I believe:
Someone should be referred to with their title of Ms, Mrs, Mr, Dr, etc. and their surname until permission is granted otherwise.
Profanity in professional situations is rarely acceptable and if so used, should be in consensual agreement, e.g. "May I speak frankly?"
It gets my goat how some believe they have the freedom to address another or use language that is not becoming to a professional relationship.
My wife, medical nurse Belinda, told me that at Anomaly Memorial Hospital the staff are encouraged to refer to the patients by their first names because it comes across as being more friendly.
In reading some articles on the internet, profanity is condoned and supported in some professional situations because it "releases tension".
"Bullhockey!" say I.
In my experiences, respect is received, even with Salt-of-the-Earth Psychotics, by giving them respect. And that respect, reinforced, has prevented escalating patients from experiencing total meltdowns: The statement, "I expect you to give me the same respect I give you" has caused many an angry patient to take pause.
I think of the multitude of smiles I've received, asking a patient, "May I call you...?" Or: "What would you like to be called?"
Profanity is rarely necessary in a professional situation. The use of profanity can be a sign of loss of control, or apathy. I hear profanity from an acquaintance as their way of saying, "I can say whatever I want with no regard to you".
I truly enjoy using euphemisms to say the vilest thing in the sweetest, most respectful way. Forms of the word "imprudent" has become one of my favs as of late: "You can't fix imprudence" sounds so much more respectful than the mainstream saying. Or: "How imprudent of administration to do that!"
Euphemisms help to take the focus of how something is said and puts the focus on what is said.
Euphemisms are unnecessary. Profanity is improper if directed towards a person, but quite apt to emphasize a point. It is the difference between mild and spicy chicken. I F****** enjoy the latter.
Specializes in Psychiatric and Mental Health NP (PMHNP).
I totally agree on not using profanity. I'm in primary care, which is more casual than working in a hospital. A couple of times I did swear before I caught myself, and my patients loved it! The situations were understandably swear-inducing. However, I really try not to and excuse myself if I do.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
On 2/20/2020 at 8:14 AM, JKL33 said:
Agree in general. Even in settings known for being a little more wild things are generally better if you just don't go there.
I will respectfully disagree, Emergent. It isn't the cussing, per se, but the fact that it's often part of a generally rodeo attitude/atmosphere. Patients can and do readily observe this and they know what to make of it = Free-for-all. That's not good, especially given the number of complaints we have about patient behaviors.
This is a fine line, for I agree/disagree with both of you and respect your opinions. And if we worked side by side, I would understand if you chose to or not to use profanity in a given situation. The bottom line is that I believe Emergent would be discerning in her use of profanity.
I have used profanity in the workplace. I have used profanity in front of patients- but only under isolated and specific circumstances in order to corral a situation toward a therapeutic goal.
"The end justifies the means."
My aim is not to put down profanity in its entirety. I merely wanted to vent and to read what respected members of our community believe toward the topics of disrespect and profanity.
On 2/20/2020 at 3:24 AM, Davey Do said:
In reading some articles on the internet, profanity is condoned and supported in some professional situations because it "releases tension".
I thought, "Well, maybe using profanity in the workplace is not such a terrible thing. Maybe I'm just old-fashioned and overreacting".
I definitely do not call patients Mr or Ms. It has never occurred to me. I do avoid “sweetie” and that sort of thing. Although honestly, I’m from the south and I love being called by endearments like that. If a nurse is calling me “honey” it makes me feel like I’m going to be well taken care of. I recognize, however, that I am in the minority with that opinion! So I would never call a patient by an endearment.
When I have patients from Africa, they sometimes call me “Sisi” or “Mama” and I usually reflect that back to them. I admit to being a little offended that I am more often called “mama” rather than “sisi” these days as that must mean I’m getting old....
I do think that in general, being respectful overall is more important than the specifics words I use. I’ve been treated very poorly by people who were impeccably polite!
I don't usually think of myself as a pearl clutcher, but when people drop repeated obscenties around me, I find it disrespectful. I'm accustomed to it, and I don't care enough to say anything, but it makes me cringe a bit. I think it demonstrates a lack of vocabulary and shows no consideration for the audience.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
I've enjoyed reading these comments and appreciate all the different views and opinions. I'm probably going to leave this thread with the same opinion and perspective as I had before reading it, as Faculty RN put it:
43 minutes ago, FacultyRN said:
I think it demonstrates a lack of vocabulary and shows no consideration for the audience.
"No consideration for the audience". We are there for the patients and need to consider their comfortability. We work beside others and need to be mindful of tone we set with what we say which, in the end, affects the patient.
Profanity can be contagious. If our leaders use profanity, there is nothing to stop subordinates from using profanity, also. Profanity rarely sets a positive tone for an environment.
A little over a year ago, after a mandatory inservice, the second-in-command of the psych division at Wrongway, Mia, approached me and said:
I, too, as FacultyRN does, cringed at the profanity, but focused on the message and thanked Mia. Had Mia said something along the lines of, "Because of your quality documentation, the facility avoided a lawsuit, and for that, we are grateful", I would have gone away feeling valued and respected. Instead, I felt like I had received recognition for my good documentation, but disrespected.
Especially since I had previously replied to an email of Mia's, requesting that she refrain from profanity during mandatory inservices.
Now Mia is the psych division director and one of her pets, Clark, used "flagrant profanity" as a presenter at a mandatory inservice. It irks me that I not only have to sit through tedious inservices, but I also have to listen to Clarks who show "no consideration for the audience"!
After objectively documenting the situation and informing those in charge, it currently seems that the use of profanity is condoned in professional meetings.
However, with this profanity thing at Wrongway, I'm "taking it downtown".
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Not using profanity does have its advantages.
I was reminded of this when I advised in another thread of termination over resignation: Back in '92, I was terminated from a position due to arguing with a coworker. During the adjudication process with the department of employment benefits, it was identified that I did not raise my voice, make gestures, or say anything profane during the argument. Had I used profanity, grounds for termination could have been founded.
I won the adjudication process and received unemployment benefits.
Wrongway's employee manual states something along the lines of, "the use of profanity in the work environment can lead to disciplining, and possibly, termination".
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
I generally dont call a patient Mr or Mrs. I will say their full name and say "what do you like people to call you?"
I'm a potty mouth and the staff around me are also potty mouths and yes, we may use profanity. I work hard not to use profanity within ear shot of patients and am careful with its use in general because while some staff wouldnt blink, others get really upset by it.
I think at times language has cultural connotations and what may be swear word in one country isnt in another and to be careful of overlaying our own cultural experience on to other cultures.
for example, i recall an american calling me out and telling me not to cuss when I used the word 'damn' in a sentence. I'm like "are you kidding me, damn is not a cuss word where I come from"
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
4 minutes ago, Tenebrae said:
i recall an american calling me out and telling me not to cuss when I used the word 'damn' in a sentence. I'm like "are you kidding me, damn is not a cuss word where I come from"
But, Tenebrae, is it about the patient, or is it about where you come from?
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Euphemisms are unnecessary. Profanity is improper if directed towards a person, but quite apt to emphasize a point. It is the difference between mild and spicy chicken. I F****** enjoy the latter.