Difficult family members/visitors

PostOpPrincess, BSN, RN · Sep 7, 2009

Whenever family members annoy me, I just keep a fixed smile on my face and say nothing.

They assume I don't speak English and go away. Works well....

Hehehehehehe... :coollook:

Jo

PeachPie · Sep 7, 2009

I work nights, which cuts down on the numbers of visitors.

RNperdiem, RN · Sep 7, 2009

I work in ICU, so visitors are limited to 2 at a time, and no visitors until I have seen the patient at the beginning of the shift, which really helps.

I like to get off to a good start. When visitors arrive, I introduce myself and find out who the visitors are. I try to establish a good relationship at that first meeting.

I treat the visitors the way I would like my family treated.

Weekend day nurses see a lot of visitors, and a few are difficult, but most are nice once they know what is expected of them.

adria37 · Sep 7, 2009

I can't help but believe this comes from management marketing nurses as servants, waitresses (no offense) and handmaidens instead of the educated professionals that we are.

anewday · Sep 7, 2009

I can't help but believe this comes from management marketing nurses as servants, waitresses (no offense) and handmaidens instead of the educated professionals that we are.

Exactly. I feel like if you put these people in their places, management will back them up and you will get written up or worse...

Exactly why I will not entertain them from now on. I provide care for the patient, ignore the foolishness/refer them to management. Let them deal will their nonsense.

NurseStephRN · Sep 7, 2009

whenever i go into a room and there are visitors, i introduce myself to the patient and the visitors and try to answer any questions they have. if it's my initial visit and i'm assessing the patient i DO kick the family out of my room and have them wait in the hall or waiting room. it's about being assertive and them understanding that the room is not the biggest and you need to do your work and it's difficult enough maneuvering around tubes and iv poles without them taking up extra space. most of the time they are very understanding and just do what you say.

however there are some families that are more difficult than others and sometimes you just have to suck it up, smile and make the best of it.

mizfradd, CNA · Sep 7, 2009

How do you all deal with these type of people? Some of them are nothing but trouble. I am a student but work as an CNA and I have seriously had it with a lot of these family members. I hear it only gets worse when you become a nurse. Some of them are so disgusting and disrespectful that it is hard to believe that people like this actually exist in this world. I mean really I believe some of these people are mentally ill seriously! We do back breaking work so that their loved one can get well and they are not even appreciative of that. They can be so condescending and demeaning to us. I really wished that visiting rules could be tightened up. It seems like the must disgusting ones stay in there for hours upon hours, making it difficult to get our job done. I don't understand why these people can't be required to step out of the room when we go in to provide care. Nine times out of ten the patient is fine. It is the family/visitors that come and stir up crap. Do we have to even interact with them? When I walk in to the patients room I usually greet everyone who is in there. I am to the point where from now on I will address the patient only, do what I have to do and get out. Any crap they try to throw at me I will simply refer them to the charge nurse or management. I am at my witts end There is so much stress on the job and these people do nothing but add unnecessary stress to what we do. ugggggg. Please help! Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

It does seem like there are more of 'em walking around outside than what should be locked up on the inside! :chuckle

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Sep 7, 2009

If a visitor is being a little too abusive or threatening to the cashier at McDonald's, the shift managers will ask the person to leave the building.

On the other hand, visitors can be abusive and demeaning to nursing staff, and hospital management will almost always side with the visitor. It's a shame that the McDonald's employee will typically get more support and backup when dealing with menacing visitors than the nurse.

To minimize contact with families and visitors, I prefer working night shifts. Also, specialties such as psychiatric nursing appeal to me due to the very limited nature of family visitation.

StNeotser, ASN, RN · Sep 7, 2009

So over the weekend I'm charting and a woman walks up to the nurses station holding a bunch of flowers. As I look up and smile and acknowledge her she stuffs the flowers three inches from my face and barks "vase!"

I tell her if she wants to wait five minutes I'll ask one of the aides when they are not busy to see if we even have any vases. Customer service be blowed, finding vases is a courtesy but not really a responsibility.

I just wonder if these people carry on this way anywhere else? I mean this woman was a friend of the patient, not any kind of paying "customer" and had she just said "Hi, do you have any vases?" no please and thank you I'd have taken the trouble to find her one. There just seems to be a level of contempt for staff coming from some visitors and I don't understand why other than the customer is always right mantra.

GeneralJinjur · Sep 7, 2009

As I look up and smile and acknowledge her she stuffs the flowers three inches from my face and barks "vase!"

It sounds like my SIL was visiting. I've seen her do the same thing at customer service counters when demanding a phone book. So, yes, some people act like this wherever they go.

anewday · Sep 7, 2009

So over the weekend I'm charting and a woman walks up to the nurses station holding a bunch of flowers. As I look up and smile and acknowledge her she stuffs the flowers three inches from my face and barks "vase!"
I tell her if she wants to wait five minutes I'll ask one of the aides when they are not busy to see if we even have any vases. Customer service be blowed, finding vases is a courtesy but not really a responsibility.
I just wonder if these people carry on this way anywhere else? I mean this woman was a friend of the patient, not any kind of paying "customer" and had she just said "Hi, do you have any vases?" no please and thank you I'd have taken the trouble to find her one. There just seems to be a level of contempt for staff coming from some visitors and I don't understand why other than the customer is always right mantra.

Wow...is that even the way to ask somebody for a favor? By barking "vase"...Shaking my head. Like I said before I can't even believe that people like this exist in this world...