Confused between school and preganacy

Nursing Students Pre-Nursing

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Well I am currently in nursing school, I have 2 semester more until graduation and I recently found out I was pregnant, which means I will either have to stop school and have the baby or do an abortion... I dont know what to do..

please help.

Specializes in Operating Room.

A great quote about having a child is this "You didn't take away my future, you gave me a new one" I personally felt this to be true when I was pregnant at 20 years old. My dad was unsupportive until I was about 3 months pregnant so you never know how your parents feelings may change. Since then, I have gotten my LVN license, am finishing pre reqs to get my RN degree, and had 2 more awesome children. My youngest I got pregnant with during my second to last term of LVN school and had him after I graduated right in the middle of NCLEX review! It can be done! Us women are much stronger than we are made to believe. My children are the driving force behind everything I do. There is nothing I wouldn't do for them which includes finishing school! Don't doubt yourself, it's amazing what a mother can accomplish for her children!

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Specializes in public health, women's health, reproductive health.
"It can also be said that some regret their decision on either side." I have NEVER met a mother that looked at their child and said, "I wish I would have had an abortion." But I've seen many who chose abortion weep over children they will never raise. Food for thought.

The fact that you have never met anyone who regretted becoming a parent (or who admitted such a thing openly to you) does not mean people do not feel that way. Parenting can be extremely difficult and many people do not talk about their real feelings regarding it for obvious reasons. Furthermore, not every one is equipped to parent or even should be parenting. I have counseled women who regret becoming a parent, for a variety of reasons, some rather serious. That's right...they wish they did not become a parent. I would imagine that most women don't regret parenting, but again, some do. I have also talked with women who have chosen to have an abortion. Most of them do not regret it and have no emotional problems from it. A few have deep regrets.

The OP will have to make the decision that she feels is best for her and part of that is facing the reality of any decision she might make, the good and the bad. Whatever she decides, most probably she will go on to do just fine.

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Specializes in Oncology.
The fact that you have never met anyone who regretted becoming a parent (or who admitted such a thing openly to you) does not mean people do not feel that way. Parenting can be extremely difficult and many people do not talk about their real feelings regarding it for obvious reasons. Furthermore, not every one is equipped to parent or even should be parenting. I have counseled women who regret becoming a parent, for a variety of reasons, some rather serious. That's right...they wish they did not become a parent. I would imagine that most women don't regret parenting, but again, some do. I have also talked with women who have chosen to have an abortion. Most of them do not regret it and have no emotional problems from it. A few have deep regrets.

The OP will have to make the decision that she feels is best for her and part of that is facing the reality of any decision she might make, the good and the bad. Whatever she decides, most probably she will go on to do just fine.

Ok, I see the point you are making. Perhaps I should say that I have never met a parent who wishes that she had not made the choice to give her child life. That she wishes the child were not currently alive. Whether a mother chooses to parent or not was not the point. I completely agree that not everyone is prepared to or should parent. You may not have seen many women who have regretted their decision to have an abortion, but I have. I have seen many, many whose lives have been devastated by that decision. I believe a previous poster here referred to her grief, alluding to her struggle. OP is young and needs to be aware that "most women do just fine" after an abortion simply isn't the truth, and that many women are left traumatized.

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The fact that you have never met anyone who regretted becoming a parent (or who admitted such a thing openly to you) does not mean people do not feel that way. Parenting can be extremely difficult and many people do not talk about their real feelings regarding it for obvious reasons. Furthermore, not every one is equipped to parent or even should be parenting. I have counseled women who regret becoming a parent, for a variety of reasons, some rather serious. That's right...they wish they did not become a parent. I would imagine that most women don't regret parenting, but again, some do. I have also talked with women who have chosen to have an abortion. Most of them do not regret it and have no emotional problems from it. A few have deep regrets.

The OP will have to make the decision that she feels is best for her and part of that is facing the reality of any decision she might make, the good and the bad. Whatever she decides, most probably she will go on to do just fine.

I dont see this as anyone trying to convince her or harass her. She posted she didnt know what to do. We gave our opinion and own life experience. As I said earlier she should talk with school, dr, etc...it's a heavy decision to make for anyone in any circumstance. I dont see anything wrong with people giving their opinion when it was posted in a forum for others to respond to. It is her choice, and I'm sure she will choose what's best for her and her situation.

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Specializes in kids.
Maybe no one wants to hear this, but i'll say it anyway...

Abortion is a legal option.

I was in the same situation at that age. I decided to have an abortion. I wanted to keep the baby, but I realized that I did not have a support system, my BF didnt want the kid, and I was broke. Nobody loves the idea of and abortion (i certainly didnt) but its a legal option. I have never regretted my decision. Children deserve parents that are mature, loving, and financially stable. I had my abortion 7 years ago and I don't regret it. The situation i wouldve brought the baby into wouldve been volatile and dangerous. No kid deserves that.

Going to school and being a single parent is doable if you have a support system. if you don't, that's not going to work. My BFF got pregnant and had NOBODY. She literally had to take her son EVERYWHERE. She could not afford a baby sitter and her mom couldnt be bothered. School wasnt going to happen.

Having the baby, abortion, and adoption are all options. Don't let anyone guilt you into anything. At the end of the day, YOU are the one who will raise this baby or not.

whatever you decide, just be sure that you are ready for what comes after (baby or no baby).

I wish you the best :hug:

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I admire your honesty and ability to speak YOUR truth. I faced a similar issue: pregnant my junior year, got married (would rethink THAT plan) had my son in Sept took a couple of classes in the winter and back to school in the fall), graduation only 1 year behind. In the middle of all that got pregnant again and that time I did have an abortion. I have rarely looked back as it was the only option for me to finish school. My son is the love of my life, never had the opportunity to have acmother child. But I have no regrets.

Make the decision that is best for you in the long run, My heart goes out to you and I hope the OP finds the right path!

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This is exactly why I love this site. No prejudices or biases, just facts and support.

I agree with everyone. Do what you believe is best for you. I wish I could give you better advice. I can only imagine what you're going through right now. I wish the best for you and good luck with whichever you choose.

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Specializes in Neuro ICU/Trauma/Emergency.

You sort of answered your own question. Although reinforcing your statement is politically incorrect, you've already stated you're not ready to become a mother and lack adequate support. So, the rest is in your hands. When I was in nursing school I had a girl who was 8 months pregnant...She took a couple of months off(a semester) and returned only to be a semester behind the cohort. So, either option is possible.

But, without a great support system you may be in over your heads. Though, I will say most parents are adamant about what they will not accept until they're faced with the dilemma. :-) Talk to your parents, the father, doctor, and nursing staff. There may be better options than abortion. But, the decision is all yours!

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well i am currently in nursing school, i have 2 semester more until graduation and i recently found out i was pregnant, which means i will either have to stop school and have the baby or do an abortion... i dont know what to do..

please help.

Decisions like these are never easy to make. Definitely take the time to discuss things with the school's counselor, teachers, and other mentors in your life for advice.

I understand that everyone has different beliefs and feelings about abortion, but if I were in your place abortion would not even be an option. I am not in your place, but agree with the many other posts that anything is possible, even having to make it through nursing school while being pregnant can be done. You always have the option of adoption if you think you definitely wont have the time or will to be a good parent.

I am an A and B student who has three quarters left to go. I also have four children all under the age of twelve who my family and I home-school, so trust me, I know what difficult is!

Yes, I made the decision to put myself through the rigors of nursing school knowing that I had many responsibilities at home, but you also, being a nursing student, made the decision to have intercourse, which resulted in a pregnancy. Granted, you haven't given specifics of your whole situation, which you shouldn't have to, but I think you know what I am trying to say. Hopefully your pregnancy isn't the result of anything other than consensual sex.

I don't think you will regret it if you decide to go through with your pregnancy, even if you are a nursing student. Just take responsibility for your actions, which includes not taking the easy way out with an abortion.

I understand that many others have different opinions, and I have given mine.

No matter what, I know you have the strength inside of you to deal with whatever life brings you!

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Specializes in ER, Med-surg.

My mother got pregnant with me when she was 17, had me at 18 and I must say, I'm pretty freaking happy to be alive. She was also without family support, but we lived in a state with great welfare programs. If you don't have any family support, check out welfare programs in your state and county. There could be resources available that you never thought of before.

Whatever your decision, don't go in uninformed.

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If possible (we don't know the entire story), make the father accountable. Guys should step it up...if they are so willing to have sex, they should accept the aftermath. Whether people "guilt" you or not, truth is truth. You have brought this out and actually considered the options...it's up to you to weigh the pros and cons and decide. Don't assume that your parents won't accept you/the child because it's against their beliefs; in fact, it is these same beliefs that say to forgive! :) Adoption is an option of course. Go over the scenarios in your mind, all the "what ifs". More importantly, stay optimistic!

We've all made mistakes that we KNOW our parents/family will kill us for...yet when the day of reckoning comes mercy comes into play. Just remember, the options aren't just nursing school w/abortion vs keep baby, forget school. Life is one BIG test...all you have to do is pass it. I agree with the above post: take responsibility for your actions, and come what may. If you have religion/faith/belief, pray. There is always hope! Doing what's right isn't always easy in the short-term, but in the long run it turns out to be best. :hug:

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I'm sorry, this must be so hard for you. Follow your heart, talk to your family and your instructors/director ect. You can have this baby and make it through school, you've come so far and dropping out would probably be one of your biggest regrets. I wish you the best in whatever you decide. I've known a lot of parents who were unhappy that their unmarried daughter's got pregnant but all of those women love their grandchildren. I'm sure that's not the case for everyone, just my experience. I wish you the best, follow your heart, but you never know how much support you have until you talk to your family.

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

I just want to say how proud I am of everyone and their thoughtful supportive suggestions and feelings. This can be a very polarizing issue and the support everyone has shown the OP as nurses makes me proud to be one of:yeah: you all.

OP, this is a very personal decision. I think you need to involve the BF is possible. Consider that your family while they may be disappointed at first, they love you. Yes, it is possible to be pregnant and in school. It's harder for sure, but doable. Only your can decide if an abortion is an option for you. I am a nurse and a parent and I will tell you that being the parent is by far the harder job....and I was 37 when I had my first.

The decision you make need to be the true one to your heart. we are anonymous strangers.....Talk to those close to you. Look in the mirror and ask yourself.....in your heart of hearts.....Is this a decision that is right for me?

I wish you the best....:hug:

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