Bad day, Bad year

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Since I've started, we've been a school that has suffered a lot of tragic events. We've had a few student and staff deaths. FWIW, we are an elementary school. Today we have another. There's a family facing the decision to take their student off life support after what should have been a routine surgery and recovery. The child is 6. I left hospice for this job. As much as I enjoyed working with the families, I couldn't do the constant death anymore. Some nurses can work hospice for years, but I wasn't one of them.

And here I am, dealing with death again. Along with the "other" stuff, like teachers who don't respect me. Just this morning I had to drag admin into it because of a student returning after vomiting. The teacher tried to drag the policy into it, and she had the policy wrong. The poor kid is now anxious, and feeling bad because she thinks she did something wrong because her teacher is hell bent on her going home. Luckly, she's calmed back down and things seem okay for now.

I'm tired of working so hard, for so little pay, with so little respect. New teachers trying to do my job and doing it wrong. Veteran teachers undermining me. Today, a select few of us are on the verge of tears knowing a little one is going die very soon. This year was already tough, and its just getting harder. Just yesterday I sent a request off to speak to someone through the employee assistance thing because I've been so stressed that I'm not sleeping. This was before I even knew about the child on life support.

I need a break before I break ?

Specializes in school nursing, ortho, trauma.

I am so sorry to hear that such tragedies have befallen your district. I don't think that the admins always consider the impact on the staff, especially when there is event after event. My heart breaks for the little one who was so tormented that she was vomiting in class and i'm saddened that the teacher didn't do anything other than slap a boilerplate policy mandate on it and not think further into the reasons behind it.

I am glad that you recognized your stress symptoms and chose to seek out employee assistance. Too many times, we just suffer in silence. Hugs and prayers, my friend.

Do something nice for yourself over the weekend. A massage maybe, even if you can't really afford it

Specializes in Occupational Health.

Sad update; our little one passed away last night. He went into cardiac arrest. As sad as it is, I'm relieved his parents didn't have to make a decision.

Then I was in a car accident this morning. Thankfully no one was hurt. I was the front car of a multi car pile up. My car is also drivable, so I'm at work.

I think I might leave after lunch.

Specializes in Pediatric Hematology/Oncology RN.
15 minutes ago, BluebellRN said:

Sad update; our little one passed away last night. He went into cardiac arrest. As sad as it is, I'm relieved his parents didn't have to make a decision.

Then I was in a car accident this morning. Thankfully no one was hurt. I was the front car of a multi car pile up. My car is also drivable, so I'm at work.

I think I might leave after lunch.

Hi, I dont know if your car accident was at all related to maybe you not being focused on driving... but you need to take your time for yourself now and decompress. You need self care. Please be safe driving home or have someone drive you...

Specializes in school nursing/ maternal/child hospital based.

Thinking of you and sending you love. This is a hard job!!! It can take its toll. Im glad you are reaching out to someone! You are in my thoughts!

Specializes in Occupational Health.
53 minutes ago, Nurse.Kelsey said:

Hi, I dont know if your car accident was at all related to maybe you not being focused on driving... but you need to take your time for yourself now and decompress. You need self care. Please be safe driving home or have someone drive you...

No, I was the front car and stopped at the time and was rear ended. But thanks for asking?

Specializes in Pediatrics Retired.
1 hour ago, BluebellRN said:

Sad update; our little one passed away last night. He went into cardiac arrest. As sad as it is, I'm relieved his parents didn't have to make a decision.

Then I was in a car accident this morning. Thankfully no one was hurt. I was the front car of a multi car pile up. My car is also drivable, so I'm at work.

I think I might leave after lunch.

Hugs...bittersweet. Agony for those having to let him go but now he is free. I'm glad you weren't injured this morning. Yes, leave early, go home, take off your personal and professional armor, and let yourself breakdown until the tears stop flowing. Be kind to yourself. Amen.

Specializes in school nursing, ortho, trauma.

definitely leave after lunch. You can't serve from an empty vessel. We educators are terrible at self-care. I am so sorry again for this tragedy.

Specializes in School Nursing.

My heart goes out to you. I can empathize with you. For several years, we tought our school was cursed. We had lost anywhere from 3-6 current students and former students per year, and it really took a toll on all of us. The worst was losing 3 in a 2 week period, 5 years ago. Please know that we are all here for you, to support you through this hard time.

We all deal with teachers that think they know more than we do and become frustrated with them. It's so hard when students come to us insisting that they have a fever because Ms. Teacher felt their head and said they have one, and our thermometer says otherwise. Mom had been called from the classroom and is on her way because Ms. Teacher wanted them to have a head start. Grrr.... so frustrating. I've gone round and round about these issues, and nothing seems to change. I just roll with it, call the parent, let them know that Susie does not have a fever, these are my findings, and let mom make the decision what to do. I try to keep my admin informed, but for me that's more of a hassel than a help.

Specializes in kids.

I'm so so sorry... please be sure to take care of yourself, while taking care of everyone else. We are here for you.

Specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing.

I am late to your party but I am sending hugs from the NTX. You've had a crap year. Also you left hospice but all the feels have apparently followed you to the new job.

There's an old song by The Police called "Any Other Day."

"And all of this would be OK/on any other day."

I want you to think that maybe - just maybe - the Universe put you there because you have the skill to negotiate the tightrope that is life and death in the dying patient. I'm not saying you'll be liking this assignment but...how odd is it that you have this background and you ended up right where someone needs your skill set? I mean...I don't have that skill set as a nurse but I did work in HIV prevention during the bad old years when all we had was AZT so I am radically in awe of hospice nurses.

Hang in there. I am glad admin is supportive. Do what YOU need to.

Specializes in Pediatrics Retired.
23 minutes ago, ruby_jane said:

I am late to your party but I am sending hugs from the NTX. You've had a crap year. Also you left hospice but all the feels have apparently followed you to the new job.

There's an old song by The Police called "Any Other Day."

"And all of this would be OK/on any other day."

I want you to think that maybe - just maybe - the Universe put you there because you have the skill to negotiate the tightrope that is life and death in the dying patient. I'm not saying you'll be liking this assignment but...how odd is it that you have this background and you ended up right where someone needs your skill set? I mean...I don't have that skill set as a nurse but I did work in HIV prevention during the bad old years when all we had was AZT so I am radically in awe of hospice nurses.

Hang in there. I am glad admin is supportive. Do what YOU need to.

AMEN!! It’s NOT a coincidence...

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