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Anybody here ever found a GF or a future wife as a "murse" at work?

Posted

I know this is the male "student" section, and this is not a Match.com or PlentyofFish forum.

But I would like to ask my fellow "Murses" a question.

For me, I just recently finished/graduated from my nursing program, and looking at the next step in life - getting a girlfriend and finding a future wife.

While I was studying in nursing school, I did not care much for dating. It's been almost SIX years since I was in a last relationship.

Actually, the truth is, there were some decent-looking or okay-looking female students in my nursing class cohort. It's just that I was more on the quiet/introverted side. I also had no luck, as I have found out through the 'grape vines' that either the girl already has a BF, or is already married to a guy. Shucks!

So do you guys know of any murses who found a girlfriend while working in a hospital, LT care facility, and eventually got married to that person?

I have just started my work as a nurse aid in a hospital about a month ago. So far, a lot of the younger female employees in my department are already married, or already have a BF. =(

I have already tried the bar scenes, joining a church, hanging out at other college campuses, and still have not been successful in finding a significant other.

mrsboots87

Specializes in Neuro, Telemetry. Has 6 years experience.

This is coming from a woman, so it may not be the answer you were looking for. But, honestly, just don't try so hard at work. Work should not be your primary dating pool. The best way to find an SO would be to just go out with friends and be yourself and relax. It is a major turn off when I can tell a man is just looking for a girlfriend. It's a good desire to want an SO and start that phase of your life, but know it will come in time. If it seems like you just want a gf then you will be less likely to find one because it comes off as desperate. Focus on making new friends. With new friends come the ability to meet new girls in a friendly way and see where it goes. GL

This is coming from a woman, so it may not be the answer you were looking for. But, honestly, just don't try so hard at work. Work should not be your primary dating pool. The best way to find an SO would be to just go out with friends and be yourself and relax. It is a major turn off when I can tell a man is just looking for a girlfriend. It's a good desire to want an SO and start that phase of your life, but know it will come in time. If it seems like you just want a gf then you will be less likely to find one because it comes off as desperate. Focus on making new friends. With new friends come the ability to meet new girls in a friendly way and see where it goes. GL

@ Mrsboots, no no no, your response is welcomed!

I have been out with a few friends at bars. But the quality of females you meet at bars, or heck, night clubs, are not the kind of mate you want to be with for the rest of your life. Trust me, I have been in a relationship that I have established from a night club "fling" and the relationship only lasted ONE week. LOL!

I am still "young," at least that's what my parents tell me, in my early 30's. Yet, my younger sister got married four years ago, and gave birth to her son last year.

Another former friend of mine (since he moved out of town for his fellowship, lost contact with him) also got married two years ago.

I feel like I'm behind that of other siblings, relatives and friends.

You sound like a great guy, but if i have learned anything is DO NOT look for a woman in your place of employment. Im not saying avoid it all together but they should be last option unless your dream woman happens to work with you. The first thing I read that you could try to work on is the introvert thing. Women love a man with confidence but not cocky so dont over do it. Be nice, but dont be in your face nice where it could be interpreted as flirting. You want to treat every woman with the same respect you would give your future wife. When woman look at other men they dont focus on how you treat them personally but how you treat others all together. Also dont be that guy that hits on every girl at work thats how you get labeled as the creep. Good luck!

NICU Guy, BSN, RN

Specializes in NICU. Has 6 years experience.

Exclude everyone in your department. You do not want to start a relationship with someone you work with. Other co-workers will have a problem with it if you work the same shift together, plus if things go bad you would still have to work with her. That being said, ask your female co-workers if they have any friends that they can set you up with. That way there is no conflict with co-workers and still have a SO that is in the healthcare field (a plus when you talk about your day). Both me and my GF work in the healthcare field, but I had left the hospital before we started dating. It makes life so much easier when you can talk medical terms and she understands what you are talking about.

Why not look for someone who shares the same interests as you? What kinds of things, outside work, do you like to do?

I have a good male friend who is a nurse (most guys I know hate the term "Murse" by the way). He is an avid biker, he scales mountains, he jogs. He met a woman doing those things. They married last year.

The other posters are right - don't hit on girls at work. It is creepy.

cd365c

Specializes in none.

This post is golden. I guess work is not a good idea to try and date co's.

Just a thought from an old lady, but when you meet the girl you will (hopefully) love forever, you won't be looking for her. It will just be.

Relax. You do not have to 'keep up' with anyone. It isn't a race, and if you treat it as such, you are unlikely to be satisfied.

I echo what everyone else has stated: nepotism = bad idea (usually, unless you don't even see her during the shift)

And keep in mind that your attempts to meet potential partners at work may be met with rejection that can often get you close to the border of harassment, and cause you to lose your job.

Old lady walking away now...best of luck to you.

BeachsideRN, ASN

Specializes in NICU. Has 2 years experience.

Join a hobby type club. I met my husband with a group of people who do a weekly short run then grab a beer after.

Dating and coworkers generally don't mix well.

Dating at the hash doesn't generally go well, either. My apologies if you were talking about a different group.

sissiesmama, ASN, RN

Specializes in ER, TRAUMA, MED-SURG. Has 22 years experience.

I'm a female answering too, maybe it's kind of what you're asking about. My dh and I are both RNs. We met the first time about 1988 or so. He was a night nsg sup and I was a ward clerk and in LPN school. He was married - he is 10 yrs older than me. We just kind of spoke in passing, that kind of thing.

So fast forward to 2002 and we start working together on a specialty unit. (He was actually my nurse mgr.). We kind of connected as friends and did get pretty close. We had both gone thru divorces - we got along really well. We went out to eat, movies, that kind of thing. When we got more serious, I transferred to the ER of the same facility and we continued to date.

So it's 2014 and this year we celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary - and it's been the best 10 years of my life. I know it's not cool to date your boss, as soon as it got to where we were really together, I transferred to the ER - worked for us, and I'm hoping we mace many more years as man and wife!

Anne, RNC

klone, MSN, RN

Specializes in Women's Health/OB Leadership. Has 15 years experience.

My husband doesn't mind the term "murse".

We actually met while in nursing school (different schools in different states) but made it a rule never to work at the same place. Luckily, we're in two wildly different areas of nursing, so it's never been an issue.

Good luck!

BeachsideRN, ASN

Specializes in NICU. Has 2 years experience.

Dating at the hash doesn't generally go well, either. My apologies if you were talking about a different group.

Bahaha. Well, to be fair we didn't meet at a hash - only at a r*ce event that happened to have a bunch of hashers at it for the post-party. We are a hashing family though :)

I have Co workers whom met at work and now have a child together. It happens, though I don't think you have much control on your environment. My hospital has a large number of generation x nurses, given I live in a desirable city. I also see a larger proportion of single ladies actively seeking so material and my bro peers fortunately, do not endure tough dry spells. Back where I went to school however, was vastly different and I would be quite upset myself haha.

KLS, I'm brand new so it won't let me PM. Yeah, although I've slowed down quite a bit. Started in El Paso, but now that I'm back home in Minneapolis I don't go as much since the kennel up here is so tame in comparison. If you're still in NOLA, we sent quite a few to your RDR, but I know how much of a zoo that is, so you probably didn't meet them.

BeachsideRN, ASN

Specializes in NICU. Has 2 years experience.

KLS, I'm brand new so it won't let me PM. Yeah, although I've slowed down quite a bit. Started in El Paso, but now that I'm back home in Minneapolis I don't go as much since the kennel up here is so tame in comparison. If you're still in NOLA, we sent quite a few to your RDR, but I know how much of a zoo that is, so you probably didn't meet them.

Weird I got your PM and responded. I'm a Nola and voodoo gal. :) on on!

As a guy who has been nursing waaaaay too long, I can tell you my male coworkers and I HATE the term murse.

sissiesmama, ASN, RN

Specializes in ER, TRAUMA, MED-SURG. Has 22 years experience.

Weird I got your PM and responded. I'm a Nola and voodoo gal. :) on on!

Awesome! I love NOLA - although hubby and I don't get down there from north La enough!

Anne, RNC