I had very lax parents myself. I can remember being spanked once in my entire life. I got grounded a few times once I reached high school and for good reasons, but other than that I didn't really receive discipline much from my parents. My husbands family on the other hand is in favor of spanking; at one point I though I was too but am now against it...but still have to stifle laughs when I hear a parent say, "use your words" to a kid throwing a tantrum; maybe because I am yet to see this work.
I am in Community Nursing this semester. The placement I am at has a brochure on why you should not spank. The brochure was very informative on why you should not spank but it lacked any information on alternative ways to correct behavior/discipline. I chose not to had this out because I felt the information was not complete. Not being a parent yet myself, I did not feel equip to give alternatives if asked once the brochure was read and the client found that no alternatives were included.
for example, i have never (NEVER) told my kids "because i said so"
I've had to say that to technicians more than once, usually the ones who get hired right out of high school who don't yet understand that their job is what we say it is and not what they feel like doing, or who have seen "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" and think that's how people really act at work.
I don't recall my dad ever hitting us, but he would sometimes take his belt off and hit the floor. THAT got our attention, believe me!
Without going into details, however, our mother did not seem to understand that "discipline" and "cruelty" are not synonymous.
My brother, who got it worse than I ever did, has said, "I would rather have the parents we grew up with than my wife's parents."
I hated The Three Stooges, watching it really used to upset me. My brother loved it, figures...
On a note much lighter than this thread, Dave Barry once did a column where he reported that some researchers had discovered that two types of people like the Three Stooges: men, and brain damaged people. He added, "Women may think they are the same thing."
The one with the bowl haircut left a lot of money to his barber when he died, because the barbed devised a haircut that looked "normal" when combed back.
Another one (maybe the same one?) died from leukemia, and afterwards, his daughter placed advertising in some major magazines, including Rolling Stone, selling his cancelled checks for IIRC $25 each with the proceeds going to the Leukemia Society. Think about it - they had his autograph.
I totally agree Proverbs 23:13 withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod he shall not die.
14: thou shall beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.
I have 4 children and they all received spankings if needed. My sibling and I were spanked as children as well, and not only did it help me to become more respectable but it also put the fear of God in me.
Just wondering who you feared, God or your parents. I would bet it was your parents because my fear was definately my parents. Just made me much sneakier and actually formed a wall between us. My fathers deceased and I often wonder how close we really could have been if it wasn't for the wall and my fear to tell them really what was going on in my life.
Just wondering who you feared, God or your parents. I would bet it was your parents because my fear was definately my parents. Just made me much sneakier and actually formed a wall between us. My fathers deceased and I often wonder how close we really could have been if it wasn't for the wall and my fear to tell them really what was going on in my life.
Oh hehe I feared my parents, but NOT enough to obey the church rule.
I fought so long and hard that I actually got them to stop going to church.
Nice...
I WAS sneaky because of the fear though. I got VERY good at subterfuge.
How did you do this?! (This is no question of disbelief--I may be in awe, though.)
The battle raged from about 11. They made me go. Then I started ditching church. They made me go again.
It got to the point that they made me go to the adult bible study with them and then to the main church service with them.
On day, in the middle of the church service, I dropped 3 stink bombs (from our local gag store). They had to literally evacuate the church because they didn't know what it was.
The previous night I showed them to my little brother KNOWING he would snitch on me. Little brothers are so reliable.
I was 'uninvited' to church. My parents stopped going there because of embarrassment. They never got around to going back to church while I lived at home. My mom goes now but she went back to the Catholic church AFTER I moved out.
Adults think they will always win by mere virtue of being adults. ROFL.
Yeah, that's a BAD assumption to make.
Wars are not won by weapons, numbers, wisdom, tactics OR time.
I have never had any children of my own. My sister though had 6, my brother had 4. Now I am the worlds greatest Auntie. I love them and spoil them to death. But they also know that when Auntie says no. She means NO. They have all been swatted across their derriere when they deserved it. And they knew they deserved it. The one thing about me is they have all known exactly where I stand. I have always been totally consistent at all times. They all love me for who or is it what I am.
Specializes in Emergency Medicine, Dr. Office, Psych.
i have to say, i have spanked my kids (now 16 & 18) maybe 1 or 2 times! they didnt respond to that! they laughed!
i tried more extreme methods-
#1- we called it amish living, we turned off the breaker in their rooms- no electric no tv no video no computer.......... depending on their behavior is how long we left it off, we bought them clocks w/ batteries for the wake up, they had to go to their rooms after homework / chores/ showers/dinners etc.. so when it got dark out , they couldnt do anything but go to sleep! let me tell you , we only had about 5 days total in 6 yrs of amish living! it works!!! but you have to be strong!!!
#2- take things that they hold dear- like if they slam the door, take the door off the hinges!! if they ignore you when they are playing video games- take the video game machine- if they are doing poorly in school, set rules to make them do 1-2 hrs of homework after school & no extra activites until homework is checked by you!
#3- no extra activities- no mall, no sports, no friends over, no sleeping over...
:rotfl:.thumb.jpg.421493329dd1f136a4222fe8e9399213.jpg){kind=small}
Proverbs 23:13 withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod he shall not die.
Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN
11,305 Posts
I loved it when I was a kid . . .:sofahider
:trout::smiley_ab:lol_hitti:smackingf:sstrs:
steph