Giving the license up - page 2

by wish_me_luck

9,162 Views | 54 Comments

After much thought, I have decided to send my license back. I will call the Executive Director on Monday and my case manager to see about future options, if I were to ever want to get my license back. But, when thinking about... Read More


  1. 4
    Agreeing with the others...seek legal counsel about the ramifications of giving up your license before you do it. If you don't ask a lawyer, at least ask the BON/VA Dept. of Health Professions. Not only will surrendering impede your chances of being licensed elsewhere as a nurse because you'd have to disclose it to those states' BONs, you'll have to jump through a lot of hoops in order to get VA to reinstate you. Plus as another poster has said, surrendering your license may impact your chances of getting any other type of licensure.

    It may be better to put your license on "inactive" status instead while you work through your feelings and focus on your recovery. How long are the terms left on your HPIP agreement? Nurses that I've known in the program found that once they completed the program or most of it, their chances of being hired improved.

    But if you truly feel that leaving nursing is what you have to do...then that's what you have to do. I won't judge that, because only you can decide what is best for you and your recovery.

    Best of luck no matter what happens.
    Firestarter_RN, BabyRN2Be, KelRN215, and 1 other like this.
  2. 4
    Thank you, Boston! That email from them gave me this little glimmer of hope this morning. I hope I can show them that I am a good person and I am trying so hard to get everything back together. I mean, I can't do anything about my past, but I am treated now and am on the "straight and narrow" so to speak and I wish people would give me credit for that and let me find a job.

    I think part of the problem was/is also TN doesn't quite understand their role in this process (the special authorization thing). At least that's what I am getting the feeling of. I think if there was better understanding (which I am trying to explain it better, just in case they have other cases like this) then it wouldn't be so bad. Like I said, if they give me authorization then I don't care to pay a small fee (I don't think it should be as much as endorsing the license because the authorization is for a specific job, not for the entire state and I am not moving there) and I don't mind to go before the Board, but I just don't like the hatefulness, for lack of better words.

    The key to getting people with mental illness and substance abuse and other issues back on track is giving them purpose and something to look forward to and live for. I mean, it's wonderful that people don't want people relapsing and using again or trying to commit suicide, etc. but if you cannot integrate these people back into society in a productive way, then all that work just does not matter because they will be back into that same position a short time later. So, instead of slamming doors in their face, sometimes you just have to give them a break. If they go back to their old ways, then it's on them, not you. Then, you have more of a point in casting them aside.

    Just my thoughts.
  3. 1
    I totally understand, Lol. To this day now I am brain washed to seek help for almost any decision to make sure I am not being impulsive. I do wish you the best of luck, and I am soooo sorry you have MORE than one state to deal with!
    Firestarter_RN likes this.
  4. 2
    Thanks, Meriwhen. I shall hang on to for now. I still have 4 years and about 8 months left (out of a 5 year contract). Ever heard of anyone in VA getting released early from contract?

    I love nursing, but sometimes I feel like we are a field that impedes progress. Maybe I can contribute to change. I hope so.

    I am slowly mowing over my set backs. First with the pharmacy board, now with the TN BON...I guess this is teaching me to be persistent and keep trying if I really want it. But, it can be exhausting and some days are full of tears. Then, you get the one day when a break through (hopefully) is made and it gives you that little glimmer of hope to hang on to.
    TXRN2 and Esme12 like this.
  5. 5
    Things are always darkest before the dawn.......don't surrender your license. Seek legal advice first. Don't give it away...you worked so hard for it!

    I know about a chronic illness, I have an inflammatory neuro-musclar disorder, and the days it takes it's toll so that even opening your eyes is an overwhelming effort.

    It is just one small step at a time......first you open one eye and then the other......one foot then the next......
    That which does not kill us makes us stronger.
    Friedrich Nietzsche
  6. 3
    Dear Wish Me Luck,

    STOP! Don't do any such thing as surrender your license! You are clearly weary and depressed, and therefore not thinking with absolute clarity! I know, I've been there myself. Do not make such a big decision in this state.

    Trust me on this one: things have a way of working themselves out if you can put one foot in front of the other (baby steps) as previous poster stated, and go with the FLOW.

    The hardest battle is with YOURSELF, not the BON. Focus on the biggest battle, if you can win that one, all other issues will work themselves out. Without you surrendering your license.

    Love and best wishes,
    Cheryl
    VivaLasViejas, TXRN2, and lvnreadyforrn like this.
  7. 5
    I'm with Cheryl. You are in very EARLY recovery. 7 months is not far out but the early period is the worst because you're still short on coping skills and long on shame, guilt, anxiety, depression, etc.
    You've heard the advice often given to widows? Don't make major life or financial decisions during the first year - you're still not over your grief enough to be rational re: your self interests. I can guarantee that the Commissioner of Nursing does not have a vendetta of hate against you. I highly doubt that this person even knows your name. The Board is not there to pave the road with rose petals - their first consideration is public safety and they don't really give a hoot about your feelings. However, the people who have designated themselves to help you through the process are totally empathetic to the rigors of recovery - they've seen it 100's of times; nurses who come in depressed and crying, unable to make a living, worrying about what their colleagues think of them, etc. The reward is seeing them a year later - able to smile and feeling grateful to have a sane life. YOU are responsible for your future happiness; the Board is NOT. Now I know that you're not spending 8 or 10 hours a day wrangling with the Board; if you think about it, very little time is devoted to going to urine screens, meetings, etc. There's plenty of time think negative thoughts about yourself and others. The large majority of nurses manage to get a job again while they are still being monitored. It may be helpful to you at this point if you just stop thinking so much (and doing more). Just let life happen - most of what happens is totally out of your control anyway. Electronic hug to you.
    diva rn, TXRN2, poppycat, and 2 others like this.
  8. 3
    Wish me luck,I wish you all the best with your difficult situation. I agree with the other posts, "Don't give up". You worked very hard so you could be a nurse so don't give up without a fight, I know I'm not. I understand how hard it is dealing with addiction & a mental illness. After my diversion I was diagnosed with Bi polar disorder. I also suffered from postpartum depression. To many we will have a label on our back but that's only if we allow it to be there. With Gods help we can overcome all things. And in our darkest moments we have to trust in him that he will bring us through it. I wish you only the best in your endeavors.
  9. 6
    I wouldn't have a problem with it, subee, if I did not live on the state line. I know they don't know me and don't have a vendetta, but I don't know how to explain to people who don't live on a state line. Our community hospital is in TN. I just happened to live in the part of the city that is VA. I have a VA license, but the further into the area of VA I am in, there's not many hospitals for the next couple of hours.

    Okay, called the lady regarding the endorsement. She told me that was wrong info because she has it stuck in her mind that I am wanting to move to TN. She is putting me on the list for the committee appeals, I guess that's what it is called (TN's version of an informal conference) in January. So, I just have to wait for the letter to be sent.

    Until then, I am going to see what I can find in VA. It would be lovely if I can find something in VA, but based on the health care facilities in the area, that's slim to none, especially being a new grad and having a board order. If I do find something in VA, I'll let TN know, but I don't foresee it happening. I'll try though. In addition, I am going to continue volunteering and study for the GRE. The plan is to take it in February and have my application packet sent in by the deadline in March and start Fall 2013.

    I am just trying so hard to get my life back on track, but stay here to do it. My parents told me the same thing, just hang on to my license and relax. Apparently, I am trying too hard???
    TXRN2, cp1024, poppycat, and 3 others like this.
  10. 6
    It's called OBSESSING, and every addict and alcoholic is guilty of it.

    We get something on our mind and it takes away 95% of our thoughts and energy away from enjoying life on life's terms.

    God, Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference.


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