When everybody knows your name

In an era of informality, have we accepted a lack of respect? Nurses General Nursing Article

This is something that I wrote for a class while I was in Nursing School. I came across it again and decided to post it and see what the reaction would be. Fire away, all responses or opinions will be welcomed, none will be taken personally.

American culture has become less and less formal in recent years. In most businesses employees are on a first name basis with everyone else, right up to the CEO. Business casual is the new dress code in many places, and in some sectors blue jeans and t-shirts are the norm. The President of the United States has revised White House dress codes, no longer requiring suit jackets be worn at all times. Polo shirts and khakis can even be found on tellers and loan officers in many banks, which have traditionally been the most staid and sober of institutions. In hospitals, nurses have abandoned the traditional starched whites in favor of a mix of scrubs and logo shirts. It's worth noting here that physicians have yet to discard their long white coats.

In many places nurse have not only abandoned their uniforms, they've given up their last names. Most seem to have done it gladly, accepting the new American informality with scarcely a thought. They introduce themselves by their first name, and in some cases take steps to conceal their surnames. Concealing last names or credentials is an issue being addressed by Nursing's governing bodies in various states with a variety of results, but still, patients call for nurses using first names and physicians and other staff generally use a nurse's first name while in a patients room and no one thinks anything of it. Nurses accept and appear to encourage this practice generally.

A physician was asked by the author how she refers to nurses when in front of a patient, and was told that if the nurse is in the room she usually uses a first name. Were she to encounter a nurse who insisted on being address by his or her title and last name in when in front of a patient she would consider that nurse somewhat cold, snooty and pretentious. Conversely, she expects to be referred to as "Doctor". She feels that patients want their physicians, even the female ones, to take a paternal role, essentially telling patients what they must do, allowing patients to abdicate their decision-making rights completely. Nursing, she noted is more maternal and intimate, and the use of a first name makes establishing a relationship easier. The physician suggested that using a nurse's first name makes patients more comfortable.

Some of her points regarding a nurse's relationship with a patient feel true. She pointed out that most of us would address our attorney by their first name, yet they seem to retain their status. But in court, the judge addresses those attorneys with the Mr. or Ms. honorific, followed by their last name. Attorneys, of course, address the judge by title or honorific and fail to do so at their own peril. Formality and at least the outward appearance of respect are expected. It would seem that the analogy, in this case, fails to hold up.

Opposite this, an example that comes to mind is a server in a restaurant. It's not uncommon to be seated at a table and have a waiter or waitress arrive with a name tag that reads "Jennifer C". Jennifer C then introduces herself by saying something like "Hi, I'm Jenny, I'll be your server tonight. Can I get you something to drink?" Substitute server for nurse and you have a scene that plays out in hospitals all around the country every day. If nurses are unable to separate themselves from the staff at the local Denny's how can we expect the general public to know the difference between the 23-year-old college senior refilling their water glass and the 23-year-old baccalaureate prepared ICU nurse adding yet another line to the seven already running while carefully managing fluid and electrolyte balance at their loved one's bedside?

The use of last names sometimes brings out strong emotions when nurses are asked opinions on the issue. Most seem to cite the need for security, talking about patients and families who may make threats or become obsessed with the nurse to the point of harassment and stalking. Here again, this seems to be less of a concern for physicians, even those who happen to be young and female. Perhaps there is a difference in maturity level between a 20-year-old with an ADN (associate degree) and a 26-year-old first-year resident. Age, experience, education and the almost Olympian authority bestowed by the letters MD may provide a degree of protection that the young nurse does not enjoy. However, while planning this paper, nurses who did cite security always had anecdotes that involved a friend of a friend. None claimed to have been stalked, threatened or attacked personally. Google searches were performed on keywords "nurse attacked", "nurse threatened" and "nurse stalked" and the first 100 returns were checked. When combined with attacked or threatened, it appeared that it was more often the nurse who was attacking or threatening someone. In the cases where a nurse was attacked, the fact that the victim was a nurse appeared to be coincidental unless the attack occurred in a patient care setting. Stalking does seem to be a more significant issue, but still, most of the evidence reviewed was anecdotal with only a few exceptions.

I once read an article which suggested using nurse's first names while at the same time insisting on titles for physician's subtlety demeans and devalues the nurse and his or her role in the eyes of the patient, the physician, and within the profession of nursing itself. The authors argued that using our last names and credentials will help nurses win and retain the position of respect that they have earned.

The arguments for allowing informality seem fairly weak overall and nurses need to start recognizing it. In giving up our surnames along with the titles we have earned we give up or fail to gain respect from our patients, their physicians, and most importantly, from ourselves. In concealing our names and credentials we deny our identities and imply that a patient hasn't the right to know the name of his or her caregiver. None of these things are acceptable. Nurses will stop being treated as second class citizens as soon as we stop behaving like second class citizens.

Sharon H,

It is a good thing that I don't provide direct patient care anymore then :-)

Where is my right to privacy?

otessa

Specializes in Med/Surg, Geriatrics.
Sharon H,

It is a good thing that I don't provide direct patient care anymore then :-)

Where is my right to privacy?

otessa

You have a right to privacy but you work with the public so you don't get to be anonymous.

But speaking of privacy, in Georgia, they publish our home addresses. Talk about feeling vulnerable. It's one thing to know my last name, another to know where I live with my family. I guess I could get a P.O. Box but why should I have to? So I understand your feelings of vulnerability completely.

You have a right to privacy but you work with the public so you don't get to be anonymous.

But speaking of privacy, in Georgia, they publish our home addresses. Talk about feeling vulnerable. It's one thing to know my last name, another to know where I live with my family. I guess I could get a P.O. Box but why should I have to? So I understand your feelings of vulnerability completely.

Oh my! They publish your home addresses!

When we release information about a patient we need to get permission. Seems like the right thing to do would reciprocate for healthcare staff information but if it isn't the law then it won't happen.

otessa

Oh my! They publish your home addresses!

When we release information about a patient we need to get permission. Seems like the right thing to do would reciprocate for healthcare staff information but if it isn't the law then it won't happen.

otessa

I feel as if it is an invasion of privacy, publicizing your address. As others have stated, being on a first-name basis gives nurses the opportunity to have a more personal relationship with clents/patients. I don't feel that it is the least bit demeaning, although if a patient "prefers" to be called Mr. Donovan, rather than Bob, that is there right as well. The majority of my healthcare time has been spent in LTC, I never met one patient who didn't prefer being called by their first names. If a patient wants to know my last name, I'm happy providing it. Of course, I've never dealt with a "stalker" client though. Honestly though, I don't put doctors on pedestals either. They simply have a profession. Those who are insulted by folks who don't use Dr. ______ seem a bit pompous. To me, it's like a preacher who "expects" respect because of their profession and insists upon being known as Pastor _______.

A person shouldn't go into a helping profession because they want to be looked upon with awe, due to their title. They should be going into a helping profession because they truly care about people, want to touch bases with them on a very personal level. Pompous sounding titles can get in the way. The care you deliver to your clients/patients is what gets you respect.....not your title. Just my HO. :D

Specializes in Med Surg.

I think a lot of this depends on where you are. In the small town hospital I work in most of my patients get highly offended when I call them Mr. or Mrs. or Ms. I try to address people by their preferred means. When in doubt, ask.

On the other hand, the my wife has given up on trying to get the staff at the center where she does dialysis to call her by her first name. They insist on Mrs. "T" in spite of her repeated objections. I have tried to get them to call me by my first name as well with no luck.

Specializes in Neuro ICU.

first of all, great feedback and discussion everyone! i love all the comments and following the discussion. thanks to everyone who contributed.

just to kind of clarify my position, i have no problem with allowing my patients to call me by my first name. but i also want them to know my last name, too. i introduce myself by saying "i'm joe blow, and i'll be your nurse for the next x hours". they're free to call me joe, nurse, nurse joe, or mr. blow; whatever they prefer. frankly, i like my patients to use my first name.

i ask patients what they like to be called. if it's jane doe, i'll call her jane, jd, mrs. doe or dr. doe at her request.

what i prefer though, is that when i'm in a patient's room with the md, that i be addressed in the same way the md prefers to be addressed. that's really where i have my issue. if i have to call him dr. smith, then i prefer he call me either nurse blow or mr. blow. if the doc calls me joe, then i call him john. that's kind of the intended crux of my attorney/judge example.

if the doctors treat us (and we treat ourselves) like professionals we are, i believe it will eventually start to rub off on the general public.

i agree with my mother completely about this, and felt the same long before she and i ever discussed it. in our society, only children and pets don't have last names -- responsible adults have first and last names. what kind of message does it give to clients when the people standing in their hospital rooms are dr. smith, dr. jones, dr. brown and susie? the message is that susie doesn't really matter. is that really the message we want to send?

i really like the above quote because it gets to the heart of the matter.

Specializes in Med/Surg, Academics.

Another person here in a thread that I can't remember mentioned the author and journalist Suzanne Gordon. I picked up her book called "Nursing Against the Odds," and the first part of the book makes a case that nursing as a profession has lost a good amount of respect due to multiple changes: informality of first name address and changes in uniforms, just to name two.

We like to pooh-pooh formality in dress or address as having no bearing on the respect provided to a skilled nurse, but I disagree. To say there is no difference is to ignore automatic human reaction to appearance/grooming and titles.

Someone above called the OP "delusional," but in the very next breath stated that doctors deserve the respect due to their educational and responsibility level compared to nurses. But what about the educational level that nurses have compared to housekeeping, both of which dress exactly the same? When you have everyone in a hospital looking exactly the same except for management/ administrators and doctors, how can a patient tell exactly who has the skill/responsibility to answer their questions and take steps to reduce their pain? They often can't tell the difference between an RN in charge of my inpatient care and housekeeping or phlebotomy techs.

Yes, I agree that patients will react more to a skilled, competent, confident nurse, regardless of her dress or address, for the most part--if they can even identify their nurse! Has anyone ever thought that some of the frustration felt by patients is when they have multiple people coming in their rooms, and none of them can take care of their needs (pain, for example) because they don't have the authority? The patients see "nurses" everywhere, but no one can help them. Patients then walk away with the impression that the "nurses" are lazy and incompetent, not realizing that more than half of the people they saw weren't nurses!

Specializes in Medical.

At my hospital everyone except the consultants go by first names, so there's Dr Smith, Jane, John and Susie standing around the bed - the younger consultants may introduce themselves as "Dr [or Mr, if they're surgeons] Smith" but usually add "you can call me John". There's certainly no idea that their level of education or professional standing means they're entitled to more respect.

The very first question on the INAT (initial nursing assessment tool) is "what do you prefer to be called." Despite this, if a patient's ten or more years older than I am I start out addressing them as Mr/Ms/Mrs X; if they're younger I ask if they'd prefer Jane or Mrs X, and if they're older but ask I use their first names too. I always introduce myself the first time I care for a patient - "Hi Mr/Ms/Mrs X, I'm T, I'm one of the nurses looking after you today. I'm working with Y, who'll introduce herself/himself to you shortly" (if it's an AM/PM shift) or "Hi Mr/Ms/Mrs X, I'm T and I'm the nurse looking after you overnight."

I agree with an earlier poster that the nature of nursing includes the provision of intimate care. There's already a significant power differential between patients and health care providers - they're vulnerable, unwell, supine, often wearing neither underwear nor shoes, and they have more at stake with less knowledge. We, on the otehr hand, have authority, autonomy, have height and a uniform (if not a specific uniform we all wear the informal uniform of our position, be it a suit, scrubs or a coordinated outfit), specific education, and far less stake in the outcome.

I do my best to neutralise this power imbalance - when possible I sit down so we're at eye level, I treat my patients with respect and courtesy, and request they do the same, I reassure them that they don't need to wear night clothes if they're stable, and that they're the reason we're all here so they absolutely should ask questions. I also acknowledge that having a horde of grand round folk is intimidating. And I use my first name.

I agree that the risk of danger from a patient or relative is low. I also know that people are not always as stable as they appear. Though I've not been stalked or threatened I've worked with two colleague who have been - in one case the patient was banned from hospital porperty and arrested twice. The only reason the patient didn't go to her home was because the phone was in her roommate's name, and because she hadn't updated the electoral roll since moving to Melbourne. I know that because the patient included that in his statement when the police arrested him for breaching the hospital's restraining order.

I have an unusual surname - since my mother went back to her maiden name and my siblings moved overseas there are two of us in Australia: my dad and I. My phone number's unlisted, I don't add people I don't know to my Facebook friends list, and I use blogonyms and pseudonyms on line. I don't have a high level of concern about weird patients, but I'm more comfortable reducing risk where possible. My main reason for using my first name at work, though, is a combination of workplace culture and power leveling.

sounds like too many nurses have the wrong employer, they should have joined the military so they could get their fix of being called by their last name all the time, ha.

first of all, great feedback and discussion everyone! i love all the comments and following the discussion. thanks to everyone who contributed.

just to kind of clarify my position, i have no problem with allowing my patients to call me by my first name. but i also want them to know my last name, too. i introduce myself by saying "i'm joe blow, and i'll be your nurse for the next x hours". they're free to call me joe, nurse, nurse joe, or mr. blow; whatever they prefer. frankly, i like my patients to use my first name.

i ask patients what they like to be called. if it's jane doe, i'll call her jane, jd, mrs. doe or dr. doe at her request.

what i prefer though, is that when i'm in a patient's room with the md, that i be addressed in the same way the md prefers to be addressed. that's really where i have my issue. if i have to call him dr. smith, then i prefer he call me either nurse blow or mr. blow. if the doc calls me joe, then i call him john. that's kind of the intended crux of my attorney/judge example.

if the doctors treat us (and we treat ourselves) like professionals we are, i believe it will eventually start to rub off on the general public.

i really like the above quote because it gets to the heart of the matter.

i agree with that quote too. i suppose though, that it all depends on how you take it, personally. i feel as if everyone should be treated with the same consideration. i do love your take on your comment about how the doctor addresses you. lol that's kind of the point i was making about docs. if a doctor wants my respect, he needs to show me some as well. also, i don't tolerate being treated like i'm not as intelligent as a doctor. he/she might know more about certain aspects of the healthcare field, but that doesn't make him/her any better than anyone else. i've always said this, "okay, so the doctor has spent years in school learning about medicine. what else does he/she know? how many other things do they know how to do? are they excellent at many other things as well.....or only know about the medical field. due to the many different walks of life nurses and cnas have come from, they may have been members of various different fields, which make them good at many things. in other words, they may have much more intelligence than a doctor, simply in many other things." therefore, who is more intelligent?..the doctor, or the person he/she sees as being beneath him/her. okay...off my soapbox. lol

i echo the post above thanking all those who have contributed to the discussion. i love all the great points being brought forward here. so much to learn.....so little time. :D

While in pt rooms, I and my coworkers referred to each other, to the pts, by first name. However, when I answered phones atthe desk, I would answer with the dept name, and Mrs last name...just felt more dignified. I was questioned about the "over formality" on the phone, I felt like by using my first name, it was like answering at a beauty parlor...

Specializes in Neuro, Cardiology, ICU, Med/Surg.

I generally refer to pts over 65 as Mr/Ms/Mrs Soandso the first time I meet them. Assuming they are A&O x at least 2, I then try to figure out whether they are likely to be more comfortable with my using their first name... If so, I ask them if it's OK to call them by their first name. One can usually get a vibe from a patient whether they are first name or last name patients. Of course, I am 48 years old and have a fair amount of gray in my hair and beard, so most pts prefer that I call them by their first names.

If a patient is under 40, I usually refer to them by their first name first, as most people since the boomer generation didn't really go for that Mr/Mrs stuff and calling them that way can almost seem demeaning to them.

The docs pretty much all go by their first names to the nurses (and other staff) though may go by Dr. Soandso to the patients. The docs with particularly difficult last names my just go by Dr. Firstname (assuming their first name is easier to pronounce -- when it isn't, they usually have shortened versions of their first names that they go by).