New nurses wanted. - page 8

by GrnTea, BSN, MSN, RN | 26,171 Views | 117 Comments

I have just read a post in a Nursing Specialties forum on Staff Development that makes reference to the need to recognize and nurture new nurses because the nursing-eat-their-young attitude is so widespread. I went to respond to... Read More


  1. 12
    Quote from milfordmom
    GrnTea-I really don't think that some of the seasoned nurses correct new nurses because "they care about them". Have you ever heard of people putting other people down to lift themselves up? It's called low self esteem. I am the first person to say correct me when I'm wrong, I want to learn and do things the right way, and futhermore I actually do have a thick skin. I have not gotten this far without being tough and persistent. Do not confuse my demand for respect for being a baby, thinskinned or any other adjective you can think of. I can tell that this is a losing battle, all I am saying is that it DOES exist. I and many other new nurses have learned quite a bit from some seasoned nurses that actually have people skills, that know how to say in a middle of a crazy day " I'm really crazy busy right now and don't have alot of time to answer questions, so if you could wait until the end of shift I will be glad to answer some of your questions", instead of not even acknowledging that I just asked a question or better yet the ever present sneer of disgust. It's called communication skills ladies, you have to communicate with the families don't you- so it is possible to have a crazy day/week and still know how to talk to one another.

    That's not what I deplore and you know it. I always taught my children that making someone else feel small is no way to make yourself feel big. However, perpetual victimhood and offended-ness does no one any good either. A significant number of people will read "I'm crazy busy right now and I'll be able to answer you later" as "OMG, she thinks I am so insignificant that she won't even talk to me, it was just a simple question, I just wanted her help and she won't help me ... I am so disrespected here! They treat me like next to nothing! Nurses eat their young!! Waaaah!" And we're off.

    That is very tiring.

  2. 3
    [QUOTE=GrnTea;7183995]
    That's not what I deplore and you know it. I always taught my children that making someone else feel small is no way to make yourself feel big. However, perpetual victimhood and offended-ness does no one any good either. A significant number of people will read "I'm crazy busy right now and I'll be able to answer you later" as "OMG, she thinks I am so insignificant that she won't even talk to me, it was just a simple question, I just wanted her help and she won't help me ... I am so disrespected here! They treat me like next to nothing! Nurses eat their young!! Waaaah!" And we're off.

    That is very tiring.

    [/QUOTE) All I can say is WOW! I guess you are a member of the crusty old bat society!
    nisteber, PatMac10,RN, and GrnTea like this.
  3. 3
    Quote from milfordmom
    All I can say is WOW! I guess you are a member of the crusty old bat society!

    Good spot. What was your first clue?
    nursel56, SoldierNurse22, and poppycat like this.
  4. 8
    It's been my experience that most nurses who paint themselves as constant victims are the authors of their own misfortune.

    Maybe they're trying to mask their own incompetence. Maybe they like to be the center of attention. Maybe they are chronically incapable of fitting in and expect an already established team to conform to *them*. Or maybe they're just overly sensitive and emotionally brittle.

    But ive personally never seen a floor where everyone "gangs up" on a newbie. I suppose this can happen, but I think it's mostly a myth. There are certain people that just like to portray themselves as the innocent ingenue surrounded by "old meanies". They go from job to job and unit to unit failing to see the pattern....
    Ruby Vee, SoldierNurse22, poppycat, and 5 others like this.
  5. 6
    Quote from BrandonLPN
    It's been my experience that most nurses who paint themselves as constant victims are the authors of their own misfortune.
    I agree.

    I think this also goes for those who paint themselves as victimized by the preceptor role.
  6. 3
    I'm a recent grad (less than 3 years) and I had various interactions with nurse preceptors, instructors, and managers during my four year schooling and employment. Most nurses are more than willing to help if the mentee displays initiative. The whole "nurses eating their young" is mostly myth. The fact is, most people aren't going to sugar coat everything. Why? We're in the business of saving lives. Maybe after some of you gain some life experience, you will understand. Overall, your perspective changes at 30, 40, 50...and beyond. I don't know, my nursing experience has been pretty great as far as preceptors and co-workers. But then, I'm 40, not 20.....so probably just as crusty as they are.
    poppycat, Altra, and GrnTea like this.
  7. 2
    I think that is pure ignorance to say that "nurses eating their young is a myth" because it is one of the most highly researched areas of nursing! and it is a very prevalent and very real problem, just because you may not have experienced it first hand doesnt mean you can write it off as not existing. I have had some experienced nurses chomping at the bit to belittle me while im giving report, they are ready to pounce on any little thing they can, asking so many detailed questions to trip me up, that you would have to look back at the emr , and heaven forbid I didnt write down what time their last pain med was given! It takes 2 seconds to look it up in the computer, and they act like it is the end of the world and I am a terrible nurse for not having written that down for them. Ive had nurses roll their eyes at me, laugh in my face, gaff-aw at me. It is meant to put down people and that is "eating your young" and the sad part is, many nurses that bully do not realize they are doing and that is part of the problem. I have also heard other new nurses giving report to the same seasoned nurses who were extra nit-picky with me, and they behaved the same way, so I know not to take it personally but I think some seasoned nurses should calm down and stop trying to jump down the throats of the newbies as to try to embarass them and make them appear incompetent! This is not school, you are not supposed to behave like the professor from hell. That is just unprofessional.
    lovelylady3 and milfordmom like this.
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    P.S. I also recently read in the NY Times that over 60 percent of new grads leave their first nursing job in less than 6 months because they were bullied by nurses they worked with. So "nurses eating their young" is real to all those new grads.
  9. 6
    Quote from nurseladybug12
    P.S. I also recently read in the NY Times that over 60 percent of new grads leave their first nursing job in less than 6 months because they were bullied by nurses they worked with. So "nurses eating their young" is real to all those new grads.
    I'm sorry, but if that's true (of which I'm skeptical) then it's just another sign that the coming generation is becoming increasingly narcissistic and overly sensitive.
    Ruby Vee, Altra, elkpark, and 3 others like this.
  10. 4
    Quote from BrandonLPN
    I'm sorry, but if that's true (of which I'm skeptical) then it's just another sign that the coming generation is becoming increasingly narcissistic and overly sensitive.
    Oh it's true, just google Work Bullying and Nursing. There are PLENTY of articles (scholarly articles) and reports about the topic and how it applies to other fields. I think many people can be sensitive, but the statistics don't necessarily mean that the upcoming generation is narcissistic and overly sensitive in every case.

    It could mean that people are finally giving light to something that has been an apparent nationwide issue for a whole. Not everyone is sensitive it's just that its been reported and studied enough to where people, in various professions, are tired of putting up with the unnecessary BS that comes from both sides of the "track".

    All of those study's and statistics can't be lying. Just a thought. Just like how now things are being done with women getting equal pay for doing the same jobs, or how bullying is being highlighted in schools more. Same principle.

    Some of the articles mention how bullying can come from various individuals, not just the experienced ones, but the new and sometimes more tech savy nurses or whatev!

    This is definitely not a one-sided issue. So why treat it as such?
    lovelylady3, GrnTea, joanna73, and 1 other like this.


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