For some, there's always a "reason" to look for a new job: your co-workers are mean, your schedule sucks, you weren't made to work night shift or a thousand other excuses. There is no perfect job, and the grass really isn't always greener. In fact, it almost never is. The secret to loving your job isn't getting the perfect job . . . it's loving the job that you have
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"The nurses here are all mean to me -- it's a hostile work environment."
Actual excuse for leaving her fourth job in 12 months -- and remarkably similar to her reasons for leaving the other three jobs.
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"They're all bullies and pick on me for no reason!"
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"Crowds of mean people are following me all around!"
While I won't deny that bullies exist, there aren't any more bullies in nursing than there are in the general population. If you're having that much trouble with bullies, it's time to do some serious self examination. Chances are REAL good that it isn't THEM, it's YOU.
If you're having problems getting along with others, and those problems follow you from job to job, it's time to take a step back and figure out what it is that you're doing to irritate every co-worker you encounter. It took me too long to figure out that the co-workers in my second job really didn't want to hear how we did things in my first job. It took one particularly straightforward LPN asking me "IF it was so wonderful there, why did you leave?" to make me stop and think about what I was doing -- after I cried for awhile and blamed my coworkers for making my life miserable. After I figured things out, my coworkers were suddenly much nicer. It wasn't them, it was me.
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"It's a horrible work environment! I never get any praise, all they do is tell me what I'm doing wrong!"
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"I don't know what they want from me! I show up every day!"
(Real complaints from real new grads, neither of whom is still employed as a nurse. One of them is asking "do you want fries with that?" and the other is trying to convince her landlords that since they gave birth to her, she shouldn't have to pay rent.)
Not all of today's new grads by a long shot, but many of them, have been raised in the land of "everyone gets a trophy for just showing up" and parents who praised every move they made. I've heard that's a generational thing. Whether it is or isn't a generational thing, and perhaps it's a sweeping generalization, part of growing up is to realize that you aren't going to get praised for every soft, formed bowel movement or perfect attendance record. In the work world, you WILL hear about it when you screw up. Of course you will -- screwing up can kill someone, and even if you squeak by without killing someone THIS time, you may not be so lucky NEXT time. You may hear about it if you have a terrific idea that saves lives or money. On the other hand, sometimes your boss takes credit for the idea. You won't hear about it if you just do your job -- that's what they hired you for, and that's what they expect you to do. Learn to take pride in doing your job well, with or without praise from outside parties.
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"I'm miserable on nights -- I'm going to find a job that's straight days."
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"Some people just can't adjust to nights, and after a week, I know I'm one of them!"
The truth of the matter is that most of us are miserable on nights until we learn how to do them successfully -- which can take months. We can't sleep when we need to, can't stay awake when we have to and are nauseated when we're not ravenously hungry. We think slower, we move slower and we hate life sometimes. That's a normal part of night shift, and feeling that way doesn't make you special. It makes you normal. I know a lot of nurses who have shot themselves in the foot by changing jobs over and over in pursuit of day shift. They wind up in a specialty they don't like or a hospital with poor benefits and then they want to change jobs again.
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"My schedule sucks! This job is killing my social life!"
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"I can't work CHRISTMAS! I have small kids/lonely parents/a solo every year in the church choir!"
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"I don't know why the OLD nurses get such a good schedule and mine sucks!"
Chances are, the old nurse has a better schedule than you because she's been there for ten years and has seniority. Or maybe she's not constantly complaining about her schedule because she's accustomed to it and has made it work for her. One of the beauties of our profession is the flexible scheduling. If you absolutely cannot stand the thought of being at work while everyone else is at the barbecue, perhaps you shouldn't be looking for work in a hospital. If you are working or looking for work in a hospital because only some acute care experience will further your career goals, suck it up and live with the schedule for the two years it will take you to become competent in your job. There's a lot to be said for a "sucky schedule." I personally love going to the movies with my nurse friends on a Tuesday afternoon when no one else is there and the price of a ticket is only $6. Having three days off during the week is prime time to take the boat to that wonderful anchorage all our dock mates are raving about -- and we're the only boat there! Even the most crowded nation and state parks have a free camp site or two, and in the winter the ski lines are minimal. If you're married and have kids you can minimize child care costs by working when your husband is home.
Here's the truth:
Most people are exactly as happy as they make up their minds to be. You cannot choose what happens to you, but you can choose how to react to it.
Happiness comes not from getting whatever you want, but from wanting whatever you have.
And a final piece of wisdom -- wherever you go, you take yourself with you.
