For some, there's always a "reason" to look for a new job: your co-workers are mean, your schedule sucks, you weren't made to work night shift or a thousand other excuses. There is no perfect job, and the grass really isn't always greener. In fact, it almost never is. The secret to loving your job isn't getting the perfect job . . . it's loving the job that you have
"The nurses here are all mean to me -- it's a hostile work environment."
Actual excuse for leaving her fourth job in 12 months -- and remarkably similar to her reasons for leaving the other three jobs.
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"They're all bullies and pick on me for no reason!"
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"Crowds of mean people are following me all around!"
While I won't deny that bullies exist, there aren't any more bullies in nursing than there are in the general population. If you're having that much trouble with bullies, it's time to do some serious self examination. Chances are REAL good that it isn't THEM, it's YOU.
If you're having problems getting along with others, and those problems follow you from job to job, it's time to take a step back and figure out what it is that you're doing to irritate every co-worker you encounter. It took me too long to figure out that the co-workers in my second job really didn't want to hear how we did things in my first job. It took one particularly straightforward LPN asking me "IF it was so wonderful there, why did you leave?" to make me stop and think about what I was doing -- after I cried for awhile and blamed my coworkers for making my life miserable. After I figured things out, my coworkers were suddenly much nicer. It wasn't them, it was me.
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"It's a horrible work environment! I never get any praise, all they do is tell me what I'm doing wrong!"
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"I don't know what they want from me! I show up every day!"
(Real complaints from real new grads, neither of whom is still employed as a nurse. One of them is asking "do you want fries with that?" and the other is trying to convince her landlords that since they gave birth to her, she shouldn't have to pay rent.)
Not all of today's new grads by a long shot, but many of them, have been raised in the land of "everyone gets a trophy for just showing up" and parents who praised every move they made. I've heard that's a generational thing. Whether it is or isn't a generational thing, and perhaps it's a sweeping generalization, part of growing up is to realize that you aren't going to get praised for every soft, formed bowel movement or perfect attendance record. In the work world, you WILL hear about it when you screw up. Of course you will -- screwing up can kill someone, and even if you squeak by without killing someone THIS time, you may not be so lucky NEXT time. You may hear about it if you have a terrific idea that saves lives or money. On the other hand, sometimes your boss takes credit for the idea. You won't hear about it if you just do your job -- that's what they hired you for, and that's what they expect you to do. Learn to take pride in doing your job well, with or without praise from outside parties.
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"I'm miserable on nights -- I'm going to find a job that's straight days."
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"Some people just can't adjust to nights, and after a week, I know I'm one of them!"
The truth of the matter is that most of us are miserable on nights until we learn how to do them successfully -- which can take months. We can't sleep when we need to, can't stay awake when we have to and are nauseated when we're not ravenously hungry. We think slower, we move slower and we hate life sometimes. That's a normal part of night shift, and feeling that way doesn't make you special. It makes you normal. I know a lot of nurses who have shot themselves in the foot by changing jobs over and over in pursuit of day shift. They wind up in a specialty they don't like or a hospital with poor benefits and then they want to change jobs again.
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"My schedule sucks! This job is killing my social life!"
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"I can't work CHRISTMAS! I have small kids/lonely parents/a solo every year in the church choir!"
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"I don't know why the OLD nurses get such a good schedule and mine sucks!"
Chances are, the old nurse has a better schedule than you because she's been there for ten years and has seniority. Or maybe she's not constantly complaining about her schedule because she's accustomed to it and has made it work for her. One of the beauties of our profession is the flexible scheduling. If you absolutely cannot stand the thought of being at work while everyone else is at the barbecue, perhaps you shouldn't be looking for work in a hospital. If you are working or looking for work in a hospital because only some acute care experience will further your career goals, suck it up and live with the schedule for the two years it will take you to become competent in your job. There's a lot to be said for a "sucky schedule." I personally love going to the movies with my nurse friends on a Tuesday afternoon when no one else is there and the price of a ticket is only $6. Having three days off during the week is prime time to take the boat to that wonderful anchorage all our dock mates are raving about -- and we're the only boat there! Even the most crowded nation and state parks have a free camp site or two, and in the winter the ski lines are minimal. If you're married and have kids you can minimize child care costs by working when your husband is home.
Here's the truth:
Most people are exactly as happy as they make up their minds to be. You cannot choose what happens to you, but you can choose how to react to it.
Happiness comes not from getting whatever you want, but from wanting whatever you have.
And a final piece of wisdom -- wherever you go, you take yourself with you.
I didn't say I was there for 25 years. I said it took me 25 years to get that good job. I've had several jobs at different facilities prior to my last job.
This is actually the "case for job hopping". Why is it such an issue that newer nurses also take the opportunity to pursue their dream jobs?
Several jobs over 25 years os a whole lot different than several jobs over two years.
Most people don't hop "several times" in 2 years. 2 or even 3 job changes in the first years of practice makes sense as a new nurse finds her/his niche. Yes, there are risks, but generally making adjustments is a good strategy for finding your niche. If a job is not right for you, you shouldn't stay--you will be miserable and you will be doing no favors for your coworkers or patients.
I'm guessing it's exceedingly rare for nurses to hop so frequently that they end up black balling themselves from the profession entirely and end up flipping burgers. I don't have data to support this, but there's no evidence to the contrary in the OP. If that DOES happen, that's a really sad situation. That person may need counseling, or even life coaching. Something is keeping them from succeeding (yes, it may BE their personality, but that's really no one else's business) and I hope they can find the tools they need to overcome their difficulties.
I'll be honest, I don't understand the point of the OP other than to criticize and meddle. Some people have more difficulty finding their way than others. If we're unable to lift them, then we should probably leave them alone. Not spend hours meticulously finding quotes that make them sound foolish and then cut them down.
I'm actually curious if this is more a result of the job market, rather than simply generational. After looking at many, many job postings, a common theme is having 1-2 years experience in an acute care setting. Even if you're not applying to a hospital job, many companies/facilities prefer to hire a nurse with hospital experience. And if you're unsure where you want to go, working med-surg at least a year (though I would say 2 years seems more preferable) opens a lot of doors and gives you a lot of experience. So it makes sense that many new grads would jump ship after a year. About job hopping every few months because you hate the floor and the people--that's a whole different story...and I don't necessarily think it's so black and white either..
But employers who expect more than a year loyalty from every new grad? Give me a break...life's too short to keep doing something you hate. Unfortunately, I agree it can be terrible on the employers side and the long term employees who have to keep precepting. I could see how it could also affect the quality of patient care. Not to mention it sucks for new grads who have trouble finding jobs because employers are hesitant to hire and pay to train someone who may leave in a year. I'm not sure what is a good solution to this problem...although I'm sure better working conditions and better patient ratios in general may help?
Another thing that I'm curious about is that I do commonly hear that a reason many people go into nursing is the flexibility and ability to work in different areas. Maybe its this very aspect of nursing that attracts 'would-be job hoppers'? People who can't seem to settle down in one area, who are never satisfied...I don't know, but it's interesting to think about...
I'm at my first full time nursing job and am getting the 'grass is greener syndrome' and often feel like 'this is not for me..', most especially after a bad, bad day and feeling like a complete idiot. I really do need to remind myself that I can't quit and this is all part of the growth process. Yes, I do totally see myself as a product of my so called generation...but I also do know that if I quit now I'm never going to grow and my future opportunities will be very grim...
Interesting read. But the day I live my life letting nursing control my happiness is the day I blow my head off. I really like my job, but I think it also a great way to squander the precious gift of life as well. Work ain't supposed to suck the life out of you
Telling someone they shouldn't leave a toxic work environment is like telling a woman she shouldn't leave an abusive relationship. To tell the abused nurse "maybe it's YOU" is the same as some abusive husband telling his wife that it's HER fault why he beats her.
How often do you hear actual contrastive criticism from management, as in "You excel in A, B and C, but you need to work on this area". That would encourage the nurse and also direct them in areas they can grow in. When you are only told what you do wrong, that is emotionally abusive. This is a great example of how emotionally abusive the nursing community truly can be.
The best thing I EVER did in life was leaving an abusive, non-supportive floor. Now I am happy on a floor that appreciates me. It is not about wanting an award for doing nothing, we are taking about the fact that nursing is a BRUTALLY tough field and to kick someone down when they are most likely struggling to succeed is just cruel.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. In the nursing world, this truth has absolutely NO MEANING or respect.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Telling someone they shouldn't leave a toxic work environment is like telling a woman she shouldn't leave an abusive relationship. To tell the abused nurse "maybe it's YOU" is the same as some abusive husband telling his wife that it's HER fault why he beats her.
How often do you hear actual contrastive criticism from management, as in "You excel in A, B and C, but you need to work on this area". That would encourage the nurse and also direct them in areas they can grow in. When you are only told what you do wrong, that is emotionally abusive. This is a great example of how emotionally abusive the nursing community truly can be.
The best thing I EVER did in life was leaving an abusive, non-supportive floor. Now I am happy on a floor that appreciates me. It is not about wanting an award for doing nothing, we are taking about the fact that nursing is a BRUTALLY tough field and to kick someone down when they are most likely struggling to succeed is just cruel.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. In the nursing world, this truth has absolutely NO MEANING or respect.
Comparing a toxic work environment to an abusive home situation is just nuts. There is no comparison. Having been in both situations, I can assure you that the toxic work environment is a picnic compared to an abusive home situation. Your example is so far out there as to be useless.
Bosses -- in every field -- are notorious for not giving feedback when you're doing things right -- you're supposed to do things right, after all -- but giving feedback when you're doing things wrong. Not everyone gives constructive feedback in the most constructive manner -- their hearts may be in the right place, but their delivery may fall short. When you're new, the smart thing is to take ALL criticism in and learn from it, and to assume that all criticism is meant constructively. There are a few bullies out there -- they're everywhere. But nursing is NOT, as some of you seem to assume, infested with them.
From an emotional standpoint, I'd say that the current nursing field is alarmingly simular to an emotionally abusive relationship. I don't think it is useless as all (although I respect your point). I have worked in many fields, but have never worked in one that brings people to tears in the way nursing does. That emotional stress is only cruely expanded by the genuine lack of support most of us feel from our coworkers.
I think a person has every right to leave an emotionally abusive situation. Life is too short to squander it trying to find acceptence and understanding amongst wolves.
I can testify to the abuse. It was instilled in me in nursing school, I can remember my teacher coldly humiliating me in front of an entire floor. Lightly slapping me on the forehead (as if to say "earth to McFly") simply because I had crossed out a DC'd order with two lines instead of one. I mean, what kind of person does that? A cruel and emotionally abusive one. We as students, were constantly told "you should know that", rather then truly educate us. This fosters a dangerous enviornment where nurses fear asking questions for fear of losing the respect of their coworkers.
In reality, I have truly seen a great deal of emotional abuse that is very vailed as promoting "patient safety".
I am sure you do not support emtional abuse, and I am positive you are refurring to self entitled people who expect to be rewarded even when they do not perform in a way that is worthy of praise. I get that, but I am telling you that there really is a great deal of abuse out there.
I also, 100% agree with you on your view on constructive critcism. I think that is awesome advice to assume that it is all constructive when you are new. However, I find that there is little constructive crticism in the field. I feel that it is too emotionally taxing to not first highlight someones strengths (if they exist) and then highlight their weaknesses. This is often not done though.
I hope that I can agree with you one day that nursing is not filled with cruel, backstabing, anal retentive, emotionally abusive and cold individuals. I guess, meet more genuine nurses I will change my mind.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I also, 100% agree with you on your view on constructive critcism. I think that is awesome advice to assume that it is all constructive when you are new. However, I find that there is little constructive crticism in the field. I feel that it is too emotionally taxing to not first highlight someones strengths (if they exist) and then highlight their weaknesses. This is often not done though.
There is little "constructive criticism" as you envision it in the adult working world. Yes, it would be nice if everyone who had feedback for you took the time to highlight your strengths first -- but it isn't always possible. The preceptor who catches you about to kill your patient wants to STOP you from killing your patient. Your feelings aren't her primary concern right then, nor should they be. Hopefully at the end of the week, she'll sum it all up by going over your strengths as well as your weaknesses -- but is that enough for you? It doesn't seem to be enough for many.
I've worked very hard to ensure that my orientees know I've noticed and noted their strengths as well as my weaknesses. Most of the other preceptors I know do the same thing. But your coworker who notices that you've never emptied a Foley bag since you were off orientation probably isn't thinking about your strengths when she's cleaning up after the one that burst. In general, co-workers only compliment when you do something extraordinarily wonderful -- and what new nurse is able to accomplish that? Most new nurses do the best they can to get through their shift, not leaving too much for the next shift, and extraordinarily GOOD is out of their reach.
Then there's the problem that an increasing number of new nurses have SUCH a high opinion of themselves already that if you lead with the strengths, that's all they hear. There are a few every year who hear only the praise and not the very real criticism that follows it, to the point where their jobs are in jeopardy or even lost, and they have no idea that they're not excelling. I've seen orientees forced to sign a performance plan every week because they don't "hear" the criticism and don't understand that they're being told they're not progressing well -- and when they lose their jobs they're dumbfounded because they thought they were doing so well.
Good point, you really are praised if you do an awesome job and not just adequate. I guess that is the hard reality I have learned in the past few years as a nurse. For me, it really affects me because I want to be an excellent nurse but I often find that I only have the chops to provide adaquate and safe care, but nothing on the scale of amazing. You can't squeeze milk out of a turnup.
Achieving excellance in nursing requires great dedication, practice, skill, natural talent and a lot of luck.
Good point, you really are praised if you do an awesome job and not just adequate. I guess that is the hard reality I have learned in the past few years as a nurse. For me, it really affects me because I want to be an excellent nurse but I often find that I only have the chops to provide adaquate and safe care, but nothing on the scale of amazing. You can't squeeze milk out of a turnup.
Achieving excellance in nursing requires great dedication, practice, skill, natural talent and a lot of luck.
Not luck per se...the ability to want to expand their practice by self-study, going to conferences, etc.
Nursing is not about being and amazing, awesome nurse; it's ALL about safe, effective care, being competent and an expert in your practice; that takes YEARS, and requires engaging in your job and self-study and the other examples I
provided above.
There will be times for praise and the thoughts of awesomeness; sometimes by the pts you care for, sometimes by management and administration; but seeking for it won't make it happen; focusing on being a competent nurse allows those praises to occur when they do; however the focus on becoming a competent nurse can be an awesome path all in itself.
Coming in late to this discussion and I agree with morningland's comment
I find that there is little constructive crticism in the field. I feel that it is too emotionally taxing to not first highlight someones strengths (if they exist) and then highlight their weaknesses. This is often not done though.
It is one of the many reasons I left hospital nursing to go to work in home health.
Since I graduated nursing school in 1981 I have held down a myriad of jobs.
When I moved to Texas I ended up in an environment where nurses are truly at the mercy (sometimes non-existent) of their employer. I came from a place where unions were common and the nursing union was strong, to a "right to work" State.
I worked for one agency for over 7 years before I was 'squeezed' out of my position. Since then I've had 4 jobs in 3 years. In fact I am back on the market looking for something a little less physically taxing as I am no longer anyone's idea of a "spring chicken" and the 'productivity' requirements have increased greatly in the past 4 years even as the acuity and documentation requirements for home health have also increased.
Ruby Vee keeps dropping this line at the bottom of their comments:
kanzi monkey
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This is actually the "case for job hopping". Why is it such an issue that newer nurses also take the opportunity to pursue their dream jobs?