You're Right, It Is You: How do I get out of this career please?

kbrn2002, ADN, RN · Dec 20, 2022

21 hours ago, Peachpit said:

The second position was FT 12 's however the schedule was to be 6 12's a week then off a week or 5 12's in a week then 2 12's the next plus the expectation of spending the night if inclimate weather was expected to cover for those who may be late or not be able to make it in at all - seriously? 5 or 6 12's in a week is too much not to mention the sleep over requirement. I declined both positions.

This is actually a schedule I've had for years. I really like it. 3 on, 1 off, 3 on makes the week tolerable as long as the 12 hours doesn't stretch to 13-14 or more every shift. The real advantage is then having a full week off. I very rarely pick up on my week off plus when it's time for vacation taking my week off gives me 3 weeks off so there's plenty of time to do whatever I want to do including a long road trip when I decide to drive across the country to visit family.

Of course I did this first in a SNF setting where the overnight requirement during a storm came into play a couple of times. But only a couple of times in 25 years so not bad. Now I am in an outpatient dialysis clinic so I've never dealt with that schedule in acute care which is a whole other beast that might not make that schedule quite so desirable.

brandy1017, ASN, RN · Dec 20, 2022

I would start with your personal finance to find ways to save money, cut taxes and live on less. I recommend Deal with Your Debt by Liz Weston but one caveat am against student loans as the worst debt out there with no bankruptcy options. Also Personal Finance for Dummies by Eric Tyson is very comprehensive and David Bach has several retirement books that offer some good info too. Because while we make OK money, we are in a high tax bracket and it's easy to make mistakes when most of us never had personal finance education and only learn thru the school of hard knocks.

IT is the best way to make money quickly and I would recommend a training course not a degree. I would suggest looking into Joshua Fluke's YouTube site and then decide if you would be interested in taking any of his classes. I think he is sincere and honest and believe what he would offer would be useful. He is a breath of fresh air and I don't think he would be one of the many rip off diploma mills out there, but investigate. I'm not into IT.

My brother works in computer programming and makes a six figure job working from home. He only has an associates degree from a local community tech college, got his first job thru his interneship and graduated with no college debt. Even without a pension, just a lousy church pension anyway, he's mile's ahead of me financially and even gets company stock plus 401K from his employer. It's not perfect, but the pay is good.

Joshua Fluke is upfront about the pro's and con's and what to look out for re IT and business in general and one of the few who is able to speak up for the rest of the worker bees. https://www.YouTube.com/@JoshuaFluke1

Roz, RN, BSN, RN · Dec 20, 2022

Eighteen months ago, I retired from a 40+ year career in nursing. I absolutely loved what I did. I did not like the toxic environment I worked in. Management demanding way more than one human can do in a 12 hour period, meager pay in return for the responsibility that is taken, lousy hours, short staffing, and the perpetual blame game that usually winds up in the nurse's lap. One evening, my coworkers had a discussion about what is wrong with nursing as a career. All of the above were listed. One nurse pointed out that "It's the same no matter where you go.". I have worked in 3 different states and in every area except OB and Peds. That point is true. No matter what state, facility, shift, or discipline is chosen, nurses receive a disproportionate amount of negative feedback. A pizza and "We appreciate all that you do" during Nurses' Week does not make up for the crap we endure for the rest of the year. Why do we put up with it??

Not everyone can retire when they've had all they can take. I think that, if you want to get out of nursing completely, you need to decide what you want to do. Once that decision is made, develop a plan for leaving your job. You may need to go back to school in order to pursue another career. Will it be worth it for you to work and go to school for the short term? Will you be OK starting out at a lower pay rate and work your way up? What will you do if, after a few years, you hate this career path, too? Will you want to start a new career of go back to nursing? There are a lot of things to consider, so take your time. Good luck.

allnurses Guide · Dec 21, 2022

Sorry this answer comes in so late as I have been in France this past week. It sounds as though you are really struggeling and am am sorry for that. Things always look worse when you are looking through a lens of dispair. I know because I have been there. I never did see nursing as a calling. In fact I was mostly looking for a steady paycheck after years of dead end jobs. I didn't try to fool myself into thinking it was going to be easy as both my mother and my best friend were nurses and both said "Are you sure this is what you want to do?"

Still I was always a bit depressed and the demands of school and starting a noc shift job with an 18 month old at home just about broke me. In reality it did break me and I started drinking to deal with the stress. Then near the end of year two of my career I attempted suicide. Needless to say I was not successful. I joined a community or friends who helped me gain both sobriety and my life back. I stepped away from the acute bedside and took a job in psych. I have worked at the same facility off and on for the past 20 years. I am treated as a imprtant part of the treatment team, management and physicians like me. I never have mandated overtime but when I do work OT it's always financially rewarding. I work 8 hour shifts so 40 hours a week and every other weekend. My son is grown now but still living at home.I have decent work life balance, I am training a service dog, grow tropical plants in my greenhouse and maintain a big vegetable garden in Spring and Summer months. I love to travel and just came back from France Sunday.

Have you sat with a career counselor to examine your options?They can be a big help. I Also see that your husband is retired due to disabilty and I hope he is collecting benefits for that. While he can't do masonry he may still have translatable skills and could possibly teach at a trade/tech school teaching his trade to the next generation. It always hard when one person feels they are responsible for keeping all the balls in the air.

I hope you do find what you seek but down take on extra debt if you can avoid it.

Peace

Hppy

allnurses Guide · Dec 21, 2022

On 12/12/2022 at 8:56 PM, KalipsoRed21 said:

Well I hope it is what a lot of people are looking for…it seems to be the most reasonable way to live. I’m just saying that I have not found it in 15 years of nursing WITH several job changes, facility changes, state changes….so does anyone else have any ideas?

I am actually taking classes to become a certified herbalist.

brandy1017, ASN, RN · Dec 21, 2022

I wanted to add Khan Academy has free courses on everything including computer programming. https://www.khanacademy.org/ The classes are geared from children to adults.

KalipsoRed21, BSN, RN · Dec 21, 2022

On 12/15/2022 at 5:16 PM, N7NP said:

What I find interesting is that people don't include themselves as a "supportive boss".

I don't work for anybody anymore. I am an IP NP. If I make money that money, that's on me. If I don't, that's on me. I don't answer to anyone except my patients----and it's not hard to be good and decent to people who shell out hard earned cash (if their insurance doesn't cover it) to see me as a Practitioner.

Yes. Agreed. 12 hr days with 8 semi to critical patients (that was my assignment in the trauma unit)....and no lunch, no pee breaks, lazy and nasty co workers on their phones....yeah....it's a bad place to be for anybody.

Her husband doesn't HAVE to work, folks. He already did his time, breaking his back as a mason. Ever tried that whole manual labor thingie? Not for sissies.

She wants a lead on something that can make the transition smoother. So yes. Sacrifice for a year or two---scrimp and save for a bit---come out with another degree....whether it's continuing on to NP or it's something like Paralegal or even Law School. Have any interest in IT? My husband does this....he went to a Community College, graduated with an AS in "Computer Engineering" (very fancy term, but it's just a stepping stone). NOBODY knows how to even use their computers----let alone what to do when something goes wrong, software companies pay big bux because these pencil pushers don't know jack about how a computer works either.

It's like Nursing in a way. Once they realized that they had a skill that these muckity mucks can't even fathom and can't run their businesses without....they get BANK and treated well.

Nurses? Well....you can see here from some of the responses why Nurses are treated the way that they are. No respect for each other, or for themselves in a lot of ways.

If you don't like how hospitals run nurses into the ground....and you really have hit the end of your tether....you will do what you need to do in order to get what you believe you want. Fair warning though....you WILL have to sacrifice for a bit in order to reset.

IP NP? What is that? Most of the NPs I know work for a facility. I live in Texas. I have not met any NPs that had their own business….really that is why I did not see furthering my education as something that would offer the life I want.

Thank you for your comment. I am glad someone else gets it. I have busted ***, I have paid my dues plus some, nursing is not the noble field I had been told it was. Yes, it is noble for us to make the sacrifices for strangers. It is a needed service to take care of the sick, fearful, and dying, but it is just toxic to the core for those who are providing the service….you are at the mercy of everyone, blamed by everyone, and empowered to do very little.

And yes, my husband paid his dues. If life could be planned, I would have met him a decade earlier and we could have had two incomes awhile. Unfortunately he spent his money on a wife that passed away and two kids before I got there. Sorry I’m so damn selfish to want what most people got to experience though during their twenties (guess what, I wanted that in my twenties and early thirties too) but there is a lot in life we don’t get to pick. If one watches enough people die, one would know that.

Money is not the end all be all goal. My number 1 goal is to spend time with my family (which even in a clinic position I find hard to do because I get there early and leave late to ensure my patients are cared for. I cannot help this. I have a good understanding of what is emergent and what can wait….but when you are 15 days behind in responding to patient questions and doing procedures all day during clinic hours, before and after is all you have to try to catch up. Yes my boss knows how far behind I am, yes they send help “when they can”, yes they know that I need 4 more people than I have to even attempt to do this at an operational speed…….but who in healthcare has experienced something different? Like I’ve said, I have had MANY jobs in MANY facilities in 4 different states, I have not EVER worked somewhere that was not asking me to do the work of 4 people. It is either a good facility with adequate safety standards where the work is overwhelming because of all the standards that must be kept with very little staff OR it is absolutely no staff and a horrific *** show where one is just run to death trying to make sure that no one dies during the shift….no actual care is going on, just a lack of death and lawsuits if you are good enough to recognize where to intervene. Healthcare has been dying the whole 15 years I’ve been in it. It just got unbearable for the last 2 and now the facilities are just wanting us to go back to 2019 like they and JACHO and any other governing agency didn’t just prove to us that we are expendable. Hospitals didn’t pay anything for the extra nurses, the government did. Hospitals just got to bill the *** out of insurance companies and patients while paying NOTHING to staff!?! But I need to continue to be a sacrificing staff member because “patient’s come first”? Uh, no. Sorry, not sorry anymore.

So again, thank you for your input.

KalipsoRed21, BSN, RN · Dec 21, 2022

13 hours ago, brandy1017 said:

I would start with your personal finance to find ways to save money, cut taxes and live on less. I recommend Deal with Your Debt by Liz Weston but one caveat am against student loans as the worst debt out there with no bankruptcy options. Also Personal Finance for Dummies by Eric Tyson is very comprehensive and David Bach has several retirement books that offer some good info too. Because while we make OK money, we are in a high tax bracket and it's easy to make mistakes when most of us never had personal finance education and only learn thru the school of hard knocks.

IT is the best way to make money quickly and I would recommend a training course not a degree. I would suggest looking into Joshua Fluke's YouTube site and then decide if you would be interested in taking any of his classes. I think he is sincere and honest and believe what he would offer would be useful. He is a breath of fresh air and I don't think he would be one of the many rip off diploma mills out there, but investigate. I'm not into IT.

My brother works in computer programming and makes a six figure job working from home. He only has an associates degree from a local community tech college, got his first job thru his interneship and graduated with no college debt. Even without a pension, just a lousy church pension anyway, he's mile's ahead of me financially and even gets company stock plus 401K from his employer. It's not perfect, but the pay is good.

Joshua Fluke is upfront about the pro's and con's and what to look out for re IT and business in general and one of the few who is able to speak up for the rest of the worker bees. https://www.YouTube.com/@JoshuaFluke1

Thank you for this information. I don’t particularly like sitting all day, but maybe that would give me more energy when I get home? The 12’s has not really worked for me in getting to have family time. I’m zonked out the day after I work and it doesn’t seem to matter if I worked one shift or 3 in a row. Unfortunately most places don’t really make the 3 in a row an opportunity because of rules like “you must schedule your self two Fridays and two Mondays a month along with two weekends.” I can’t really work more than 3 in a row….that is why I switched to clinic.
Anyway, thank you again and I will look up those resources.

Beerman, BSN · Dec 21, 2022

On 12/16/2022 at 1:10 PM, subee said:

"Self talk" is exactly what got me through to my goal of not retiring before 66 1/2. I felt so physically beat up before that age but kept telling myself that I was lucky to have a job that paid me well enough that I didn't have to live on overtime. I had no skills beyond anesthesia. I made it to my goal and now was able to save enough money not to have to pinch pennies in retirement and I'm so glad I held onto that "great" job.

CRNA felt physically beat up...LOL

KalipsoRed21, BSN, RN · Dec 21, 2022

6 hours ago, Roz, RN said:

Eighteen months ago, I retired from a 40+ year career in nursing. I absolutely loved what I did. I did not like the toxic environment I worked in. Management demanding way more than one human can do in a 12 hour period, meager pay in return for the responsibility that is taken, lousy hours, short staffing, and the perpetual blame game that usually winds up in the nurse's lap. One evening, my coworkers had a discussion about what is wrong with nursing as a career. All of the above were listed. One nurse pointed out that "It's the same no matter where you go.". I have worked in 3 different states and in every area except OB and Peds. That point is true. No matter what state, facility, shift, or discipline is chosen, nurses receive a disproportionate amount of negative feedback. A pizza and "We appreciate all that you do" during Nurses' Week does not make up for the crap we endure for the rest of the year. Why do we put up with it??

Not everyone can retire when they've had all they can take. I think that, if you want to get out of nursing completely, you need to decide what you want to do. Once that decision is made, develop a plan for leaving your job. You may need to go back to school in order to pursue another career. Will it be worth it for you to work and go to school for the short term? Will you be OK starting out at a lower pay rate and work your way up? What will you do if, after a few years, you hate this career path, too? Will you want to start a new career of go back to nursing? There are a lot of things to consider, so take your time. Good luck.

Thank you Roz, and congratulations on your retirement. Everything you said rings true for me too. 15 years, 4 states, 6 specialties, and really I love what I am suppose to be, but the scales just tip to a no with the abuse and the work requirements. I can’t do 4 peoples amount of work, management is never given a budget to fix anything unless moderate mistakes are getting made (they still blame you and tell you that you need to do more, but that they are going to hire someone because they see the need now.) I get the game, I just have a hard time allowing the *** to roll down on patient’s ignorant of the system….because a nurse’s first job is patient advocate. And because I just have a problem in my soul if I just “let it happen” I stay late, it is easy to bend my arm and ask me to help, to forego breaks, so that things don’t fall through. Aside from being tired of the abuse and blame, I have a 2 year old that took me 7 years to get. As I am 41 it may not be real likely that I will get another one, and I just don’t want to spend the effort doing school or working on my little time off. She is only going to be little for a little while and I don’t want to miss my life because strangers and management want more from me than I can give. But I need the pay and the benefits. Just feeling stuck. Anyway, thank you.

KalipsoRed21, BSN, RN · Dec 21, 2022

6 hours ago, hppygr8ful said:

Sorry this answer comes in so late as I have been in France this past week. It sounds as though you are really struggeling and am am sorry for that. Things always look worse when you are looking through a lens of dispair. I know because I have been there. I never did see nursing as a calling. In fact I was mostly looking for a steady paycheck after years of dead end jobs. I didn't try to fool myself into thinking it was going to be easy as both my mother and my best friend were nurses and both said "Are you sure this is what you want to do?"

Still I was always a bit depressed and the demands of school and starting a noc shift job with an 18 month old at home just about broke me. In reality it did break me and I started drinking to deal with the stress. Then near the end of year two of my career I attempted suicide. Needless to say I was not successful. I joined a community or friends who helped me gain both sobriety and my life back. I stepped away from the acute bedside and took a job in psych. I have worked at the same facility off and on for the past 20 years. I am treated as a imprtant part of the treatment team, management and physicians like me. I never have mandated overtime but when I do work OT it's always financially rewarding. I work 8 hour shifts so 40 hours a week and every other weekend. My son is grown now but still living at home.I have decent work life balance, I am training a service dog, grow tropical plants in my greenhouse and maintain a big vegetable garden in Spring and Summer months. I love to travel and just came back from France Sunday.

Have you sat with a career counselor to examine your options?They can be a big help. I Also see that your husband is retired due to disabilty and I hope he is collecting benefits for that. While he can't do masonry he may still have translatable skills and could possibly teach at a trade/tech school teaching his trade to the next generation. It always hard when one person feels they are responsible for keeping all the balls in the air.

I hope you do find what you seek but down take on extra debt if you can avoid it.

Peace

Hppy

Thank you for sharing Hppy. I’m glad you were able to find some balance and that you are still here to share your experiences. I do feel stuck and I agree that does make it feel more desperate. But the abuse in healthcare is pretty phenomenal too. The cynical skin I have developed to combat the abuse is not me at the core, but it is my go to tool to deal.
My husband does not qualify as disabled. But he is the full time caregiver for our daughter who is 2, which does save us quite a bit of money. Unfortunately he is just done with the work world. Masonry is very hard on the body and he has a lot of arthritis (so it is good he has to get up and chase around our daughter), but prior to me he was working double shifts for years with a sick wife and two kids…so he is just really tired and in recovery himself.
I am just very tired of giving so much as a nurse and would rather be giving it to my family. It took me so long to have a family, it is really everything I hoped for, and I am tired of squandering that time for my employer or strangers. I have a moral dilemma though, I cannot do less for my patients because it is not how I want to be treated when I go to the hospital and because the system has so many cracks and is failing. I just can’t do it, I’ve tried to just leave at the end of the day.

Anyway, thank you again for sharing.

klone, MSN, RN · Dec 21, 2022

11 hours ago, hppygr8ful said:

I am actually taking classes to become a certified herbalist.

Ha, I was a certified herbalist before I became an RN. Had a fairly successful business/website and everything.