So many of you are amazing people and nurses. The time you put in responding to posts on Allnurses really does make a difference.
BUT.
When people come here asking for advice on a situation, they are not looking for your opinion of them as a person or their behavior. You all know what threads I'm talking about.
It's one thing to point out that their behavior could potentially be dangerous to patients.
It's one thing to be honest and tell them that their future doesn't look too bright.
It's one thing to suggest they may find seeing a therapist very helpful.
It's another to tell them they are mentally ill, mock them RELENTLESSLY, or judge them. When you do this to your fellow nurses (that have just come to you for advice), you're worse than that poor, scared soul you FLAMED for thinking a drug abuser may have a bloodborne illness.
These posters are often simply desperate, scared, or just plain curious!
I know it's important to have a thick skin when you work in healthcare, and I sure as heck am not busting out the trigger-words bully†or NETY.†It's just that even in my CNA class, it was emphasized over and over that it's not our place to judge patients. Can't you afford the same courtesy to other nurses?
I'm generally a pretty quiet person, but I believe in standing up for other people. So I just had to put this out there.
Specializes in Flight, ER, Transport, ICU/Critical Care.
I am backing off for a while until I get right with myself.
I just love this. Hope I've not taken the last line out of context too much, but ... nice.
I think this may need it's own MEME.
I don't know if it's the crapballs week or longer I've had, but I've laughed (inappropriately demonic laugh) about just how much this statement could/should/would have applied to me and a few dozen others I know that needed this advice.
Careful..... naughty threads have been disappearing lately....
I know! I wish I got some kind of notification... I was posting, and then I had dinner, and then two threads I was enjoying were gone. I just... I need closure... why do threads keep leaving me?
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
...But I just have to say:
So many of you are amazing people and nurses. The time you put in responding to posts on Allnurses really does make a difference.
BUT.
When people come here asking for advice on a situation, they are not looking for your opinion of them as a person or their behavior. You all know what threads I'm talking about.
It's one thing to point out that their behavior could potentially be dangerous to patients.
It's one thing to be honest and tell them that their future doesn't look too bright.
It's one thing to suggest they may find seeing a therapist very helpful.
It's another to tell them they are mentally ill, mock them RELENTLESSLY, or judge them. When you do this to your fellow nurses (that have just come to you for advice), you're worse than that poor, scared soul you FLAMED for thinking a drug abuser may have a bloodborne illness.
These posters are often simply desperate, scared, or just plain curious!
I know it's important to have a thick skin when you work in healthcare, and I sure as heck am not busting out the trigger-words bully†or NETY.†It's just that even in my CNA class, it was emphasized over and over that it's not our place to judge patients. Can't you afford the same courtesy to other nurses?
I'm generally a pretty quiet person, but I believe in standing up for other people. So I just had to put this out there.
You realise when you use 'but' in a sentence you are negating everything that comes before the but?
When I post on all nurses, I'm off duty, however the face I wear when I'm on duty is much the same, so what you see of me here is the same face you would see if you knew me in real life.
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
People can be astronomically stupid, I agree.
Here. I really do want to talk about this without being nasty or snide *ahem.* after reading some responses and reevaluating, how about this take on it: I feel like sometimes the number of posts that offer no advice in response to a "stupid question" wayy outnumber those that are objective and helpful.
Is that something we can address? That those who say "you don't like something, don't read it" tend not to take their own advice?
Can we acknowledge that there exists a breed of post that offers no advice and just says "you're stupid" IN ADDITION to those that are harsh but educational?
I would like to suggest, if my posts offend anyone, feel free to put me on ignore:yes:
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
The thing about online forums and conversations with strangers is that the anonymity is empowering to many people. Many people will say things behind a computer screen that they would never say face to face to the very same person.....
I have a golden rule. If I wouldnt say it to someones face, I wont say it online
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is watching. An example is how you treat people in your everyday encounters. I strongly feel like this very much applies to the topic of discussion.
So basically if we dont agree with you we lack integrity?
And here you are talking about not running people down. That makes sense
I've yet to read anything posted here that moves the bar beyond the point of no return. However, that could be due to outstanding moderation efforts...
I post on this site in the same way I would speak to another individual in the field. And while I don't always agree with what I read here, (some of the younger entitled folks who believe they are owed everything), I don't believe I've crossed that line.
My ears/eyes are open nonetheless if it's believed that I have.
Im pretty good at trying to focus on what the OP asked whether I agree with them or their views s or not amd stripping away anything that may come off as unneeded extra fluff or judgey.
Alas some people just cant put their emotional and personalal views aside to provide an almost completely objective and accurate answer.
I just left a mind-numbing read on another thread because there were a couple posters that were incredibly thickheaded and downright inappropriate and frankly, ignorant and childish beyond belief.
But it did provide for a few good chuckles. I usually lurk those kinds of threads just to laugh as how incredibly shortsighted people can be.
You realise when you use 'but' in a sentence you are negating everything that comes before the but?
When I post on all nurses, I'm off duty, however the face I wear when I'm on duty is much the same, so what you see of me here is the same face you would see if you knew me in real life.
To some extent you're correct, BUT i think you missed the point here (haha see what i did there:roflmao:)
the OP said theyre are generally a quiet person BUT negated that statement by basically saying they will not remain quiet when someone is being bullied and feels they should step in to help, at which case they will become fervent and vocal.
Thank you, but I keep coming late into the threads after they've been closed. I normally hit that button like it's a Jeopardy buzzer when it's needed.
Okay, but in those instances you are seeing the moderation at work. Posts got out of hand, and the mods did what they do, closed the thread. In some cases, they will even remove the thread entirely.
This forum is overall a very good one. While mean/rude/nasty posts will be made (and usually moderated), I think a lot of time people confuse posts which may be blunt/brutally honest/in stark and vigorous disagreement with their own- to be rude. Posts written in a style different than our own usual approach to posting are NOT necessarily rude or against TOS.
And as said before, these types of threads written in order to shame or persuade people to change their posting style almost never get that result. The only thing that really works is moderation by the admins. So have faith in moderation, use the triangle when you think it's necessary, or accept that maybe, just maybe your definition of unacceptable may occasionally just be a trigger finger wanting to censor alternate viewpoints.
I completely agree with you! I cringe when I think of how rude some responses can be.
Lots of people (not just nurses) fail to realize that at one point, they, too, were novices. New. With little-to-no experience. Why is it so hard to be encouraging and supportive? Would you talk to your family in this way? Would you want someone to talk to your loved ones in the same way you keyboard warriors degrade and bash a helpless individual who is most probably scared and in need of some advice?
Point is: there is a way to get your point across. It is not necessary to be downright nasty. Be kind people. Spread that *****like glitter.
Medic/Nurse, BSN, RN
880 Posts
I just love this. Hope I've not taken the last line out of context too much, but ... nice.
I think this may need it's own MEME.
I don't know if it's the crapballs week or longer I've had, but I've laughed (inappropriately demonic laugh) about just how much this statement could/should/would have applied to me and a few dozen others I know that needed this advice.
Thank you. Really.