This is a vent It's not an original one, this has been griped about before
In another thread I've been posting in, a long-time member who often answers questions and posts helpful advice posed the the following question regarding giving advice; why do we bother?
I've been asking myself the very same thing. Actually, I know the answer for myself at least. I bother because every once in a while the poster who you answer/try to help actually seems to appreciate that someone took the time and is polite enough to acknowledge this and say thank you.
Why would any of us take time out of our days to answer questions asked by other posters, if not to try to help that poster. Sometimes the advice we offer is good and at times the advice might be poor. Sometimes the advice is what the person asking was hoping to hear. Sometimes it's not. However, the common denominator in the vast majority of cases is that the poster offering advice is actually trying to help the other poster.
About a week ago I answered a first-time poster who had a question regarding dosage calculation. It's a sad testament to the current state of affairs that when this poster actually came back and said "thank you guys so much!" my reaction was almost one of shock. (Okay, I admit I'm exaggerating just a wee bit, but really it is a rather rare occurence to have someone actually return and say thanks). Because this person expressed appreciation, I know that I will definitely try to answer any questions this poster might have in the future.
I answered another question yesterday only to see the poster making a brand new thread today asking the same question. The subject matter this first-time poster was asking about happens to be something I enjoy (which makes me a bit of a ) and I would have been happy to provide further assistance. As it is, I think that perhaps the poster was hoping for the explicit answer to the homework assignment instead of merely being offered support and information on how to find the answer for him/herself.
I've expressed the following opinion many times. I don't believe in handing the answers to homework assignments on a silver platter. The students who come here and ask for advice are our future colleagues. I want them to be proficient at locating data for themselves. I want them to be able to critically assess the quality of the data that they find. I want them to become competent professionals. I don't want to sabotage the process required to reach that level of proficiency. While I have no doubt that some posters think that I'm being stingy with the advice that I offer, my motivation is actually to help.
I am responsible for my choices. No one forces me to answer any posts, I do that of my own free will. I don't expect posters to bow and scrape and generally gush gratitude all over the forum simply because I or someone else has answered their question. But a simple thank you goes a long way. Here, just as in real life.
Although in many cases it would be nice to be thanked, the reality is, participating in discussions in AllNurses.com is only a minimal part of most of the posters lives. Also, sometimes discussion boards get so many posts it takes a lot of time to read through all the responses and thank everybody. As well, many times posters are told things they don't want to hear, so, wrong as it may be, it causes some resentment in them.
I understand what you're saying here and I agree that most of us of course have many other duties and interests in life apart from AN.
I guess what I feel is that if a person shows up for the sole purpose of asking complete strangers for a favor, I expect them to take the time to acknowledge the help they receive. A simple thank you or even a "like" will do just fine.
I can't help but feeling that those who offer help/advice when a person asks is taken for granted/being used by the person asking for help when the help goes unacknowledged. I think they're displaying poor manners. Showing up on a message board without even bothering to provide a brief introduction/ background about oneself and expecting that people help you out, is to me a bit like showing up in a stranger's home and saying "hey, fix me some dinner". Perhaps not quite like your home, a forum is different but I think you understand what I'm trying to say. AN is a community and I think it's the exchange of ideas, opinons, support and advice that makes it a popular site.
I guess in my opinion "balance" and reciprocity makes a social site flourish.
@Buyer beware. I'm not sure how your comments about patients pertains to this, but I'll give you a like since I agree with you on the hope part :)
I guess that you're saying that I have unrealistic expectations. Perhaps, but
on this topic I choose to ignore my cynical tendencies and choose to remain optimistic.
On a completely unrelated topic. What the **** is up with autocorrect? My English grammar is atrocious but autocorrect is actually managing to mess it up even worse than I do (and that's no mean feat )
Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.
I admit I have become more scarce here because it just doesn't seem to be a wise use of my time. So many are looking for validation or specific answers rather than actual advice and often what they are looking for is the exact opposite of reality (which is why they are looking for it...something in them already knows this). I reserve the right to decline to interact. My time is worth something. Not saying they are going to miss me or anything. Just saying I choose not to let myself be affected by the drama.
Um, did you even read the OP? It has nothing to do with a thank you from patients. It has to do with getting a thank you from posters who come here asking for help and advice.
I'm with macawake- so many posters come here in search of help/advice, and when those of us who respond attempt to guide them to answers without spoon-feeding, we are rebuked for doing so because they only want the answer, not how to find the answer. We also are rebuked for giving advice that is contrary to what the poster wanted to hear. Granted, it's not all of those asking, but it is a fair few. Then there are the post and run- post their question and never return to post on the thread again, leaving us to wonder if they even read the responses. Just a quick thank you (or even a like- at least there was acknowledgement of the response) means that there's some amount of appreciation.
Sorry about that. Maybe I was being a bit obtuse. I'm just stuck on the doormat feeling but then again I've been around the block. I stand corrected.
And to the point: over 800 posts, 1 thank you. But somehow I know deep in my heart that many of my dear colleagues meant to say "thanks for sharing your experience and knowledge so I won't make the same mistakes you did."
But I digress and still believe we could start with a "thank you" from patients because I've long given up on the lack of the common sense courtesies among nurses that are so often cited as the hallmark of the so-called non-professional class.
After all, if we can't get a thumbs-up ( or even "thanks") from other nurses how is it fair to blame the patients for being so inconsiderate..
I think it would be helpful if the website alerted you to responses on your posts.....it alerts you to other things, i think people sometimes just dont realize they have been responded to...
I think it would be helpful if the website alerted you to responses on your posts.....it alerts you to other things, i think people sometimes just dont realize they have been responded to...
When bookmark a thread, it provides you the option of no notification, or immediate, daily, or weekly email updates.
I think it would be helpful if the website alerted you to responses on your posts.....it alerts you to other things, i think people sometimes just dont realize they have been responded to...
When bookmark a thread, it provides you the option of no notification, or immediate, daily, or weekly email updates.
I check my Bookmarks each morning and see if there are responses to the threads I've participated in.
I don't want to be notified and turned off that function when my email got way too busy with notifications.
I don't want to be notified and turned off that function when my email got way too busy with notifications.
Yes, I dont want it filling up my email either. But I would love a little notification in the top right corner of the screen, like I get when someone likes a post! :)
Specializes in OR, Nursing Professional Development.
Yes, I dont want it filling up my email either. But I would love a little notification in the top right corner of the screen, like I get when someone likes a post! :)
It's only 2 clicks to find the bookmarks on the desktop site- click on username, click on bookmarks. On the mobile site, tap the menu icon (the 3 bars in the upper right corner) and then tap on bookmarks. If a thread has been posted in, it'll be in bold. Those that don't have new posts will be regular font. I'd rather not get an alert for every time someone replies to a thread I've posted in- I'll log in to hundreds of alerts!
It's only 2 clicks to find the bookmarks on the desktop site- click on username, click on bookmarks. On the mobile site, tap the menu icon (the 3 bars in the upper right corner) and then tap on bookmarks. If a thread has been posted in, it'll be in bold. Those that don't have new posts will be regular font. I'd rather not get an alert for every time someone replies to a thread I've posted in- I'll log in to hundreds of alerts!
I don't use a mobile site because I refuse to access AN via a phone.
But as noted, I check my bookmarks as you said, and if there is a new post, it will be bolded. That's an easy way to check.
And truly, I'm not interested in "likes". Although I was chastised (LOL) by a friend here for not "liking" posts.
I go to the Dashboard & manually click on everything I've commented on to see what's going on with still-active threads. It's a bit tedious to go to each thread & find where I last left it. So I've only checked back on *maybe* 1/3 of the threads I've participated in.
You don't have to go to your Dashboard. Click on your name, then hit "Bookmarks" directly, which will take you to all the threads you've participated in. Any thread with new posts will be bolded. If you hit the downward arrow to the left of the thread title, it will take you to where you left off in the thread. It's not at all tedious imo.
On a completely unrelated topic. What the **** is up with autocorrect? My English grammar is atrocious but autocorrect is actually managing to mess it up even worse than I do (and that's no mean feat )
75% of my grammar and spelling errors are from my autocorrect. I always try to read through before posting, but I get these crazy words that make no sense and I often get in and on mixed with autocorrect and it often changes and to weird words. Lol. Autocorrect is my nemesis on here!
75% of my grammar and spelling errors are from my autocorrect. I always try to read through before posting, but I get these crazy words that make no sense and I often get in and on mixed with autocorrect and it often changes and to weird words. Lol. Autocorrect is my nemesis on here!
It drives me nuts
If I type "I think so too" autocorrect translates that to "I Think so to". Capitalizing random Words.. Okay, let's try that again... Capitalizing random words (had to manually correct the darn w) and changing a correct Word ) to the incorrect one. Seriously, Point as well ??! If I type "their daughter", autocorrect prefers "there daughter". (sounding more like an angry parent chastising his or her offspring, rather than an attempt to describe how one person is related to Another person. Don't get me started on "one". Half the time I type "one", it's changed to "on". Stupid autocorrect, I meant to write "one time". I wasn't referring to someone being "on time".
And truly, I'm not interested in "likes". Although I was chastised (LOL) by a friend here for not "liking" posts.
Okay Spidey's mom, now I'm too scared to "like" that post
Seriously though, I guess I view "likes" sort of like the nods or the "uh-huh" sounds one makes when having a conversation with someone in real life. I will almost always like posts when I agree with what the posters say and sometimes even when I don't agree, if I think that the poster made a good point/ presented their case well. I just see them as a part of the social interaction. I think that they come in handy when I don't have the time or energy to make a post of my own stating that I agree with poster x or y, but still want to make the other person know that I appreciated their post.
Since this is a thread about being polite and acknowledging the replies you receive, I'd like to take the opportunity to thank everyone who has contributed in this thread :)
It's not an original one, this has been griped about before 
) and I would have been happy to provide further assistance. As it is, I think that perhaps the poster was hoping for the explicit answer to the homework assignment instead of merely being offered support and information on how to find the answer for him/herself. 
So I've only checked back on *maybe* 1/3 of the threads I've participated in.
)
If I type "their daughter", autocorrect prefers "there daughter". (sounding more like an angry parent chastising his or her offspring, rather than an attempt to describe how one person is related to Another person. Don't get me started on "one". Half the time I type "one", it's changed to "on". Stupid autocorrect, I meant to write "one time". I wasn't referring to someone being "on time".
macawake, MSN
2,141 Posts
I understand what you're saying here and I agree that most of us of course have many other duties and interests in life apart from AN.
I guess what I feel is that if a person shows up for the sole purpose of asking complete strangers for a favor, I expect them to take the time to acknowledge the help they receive. A simple thank you or even a "like" will do just fine.
I can't help but feeling that those who offer help/advice when a person asks is taken for granted/being used by the person asking for help when the help goes unacknowledged. I think they're displaying poor manners. Showing up on a message board without even bothering to provide a brief introduction/ background about oneself and expecting that people help you out, is to me a bit like showing up in a stranger's home and saying "hey, fix me some dinner". Perhaps not quite like your home, a forum is different but I think you understand what I'm trying to say. AN is a community and I think it's the exchange of ideas, opinons, support and advice that makes it a popular site.
I guess in my opinion "balance" and reciprocity makes a social site flourish.
@Buyer beware. I'm not sure how your comments about patients pertains to this, but I'll give you a like since I agree with you on the hope part :)
I guess that you're saying that I have unrealistic expectations. Perhaps, but
on this topic I choose to ignore my cynical tendencies and choose to remain optimistic.
On a completely unrelated topic. What the **** is up with autocorrect? My English grammar is atrocious but autocorrect is actually managing to mess it up even worse than I do (and that's no mean feat
)