I am a nursing student, currently studying to be an RN. I am really enjoying the experience, however I have an issue that is concerning me.
When chatting up women and the conversation comes up about what I do, and I reply studying nursing, their eyes widen and the mood seems to change. This is not related to women in the field but those outside. As soon as I utter the word nurse, I seem to go from a confident manly guy to a nice guy to them. I know women want confident manly sort of men, but women also say they like a man to be sensitive and caring. Can’t a male nurse be sensitive and manly? Do these women see nurses as somewhat effeminate, at worst gay?
If a woman is able to climb the corporate ladder and make big money in business and still have sex appeal, does a man need to limit himself to traditional masculine roles to prove his maleness and be attractive to women or can he do a traditionally feminine job of helping and caring for people.
I understood that when women refer to equality, it is for both men and women. They it’s a great idea for men to be nurses, but individually, their actions seem to speak louder than their words.
I would be very interested in your opinions on this both guys and girls
Just curious....I met my wife in college and we are both nurses. One of my favorite things about our relationship is that we can talk/vent about our days at work and we always can find understanding in each others success and disappointments. She understands me like no one else. Do you think that because we both are in the same profession makes all the difference?
I think this makes all the difference. Both my parents are nurses, they met in Nursing school too...I know for a fact they have been very supportive and understanding of each other regarding issues at work, bad day or loosing one of thier patients..even though they worked in different departments with different dynamics they really knew the importantace of venting, crying and being supportive to each other.
On another note, I personally believe it makes a difference when there is a male nurse on the floor. It seems like it really changes the dynamics as opposed to all women on the floor. That is just my observation, and I think too that a man being a nurse is in no way a "less than" occupation. Majority of the male nurses I know are very manly....and great critical thinkers...just my opinion.
Johny1, you are my hero! If the world had a bulletin board for all to see, I would post it there. It's been a long time since I've heard such wise words coming from a guy, and I'm a guy.
I say be proud of who you are... This is just stupid to be hiding from a time-honored profession like nursing. I am a nurse, and PROUD of it! I know being male and a nurse may bend some peoples perception of what is traditional, but I don't care --- anyone asks me what I do for a living, I'm happy to tell them. I am an important part of people's lives, and that's what counts.
Just curious....I met my wife in college and we are both nurses. One of my favorite things about our relationship is that we can talk/vent about our days at work and we always can find understanding in each others success and disappointments. She understands me like no one else. Do you think that because we both are in the same profession makes all the difference?
Same here - met my wife in training 18 yrs ago, and although the compromizes made having 2 shift-workers in the house and raising 3 kids in the midst of it all, and the stress of the job, I couldn't imagine being married to someone who wasn't a nurse. Only a nurse, or someone closely associated with the nursing/medical field, can completely understand another nurse.
It's my birthday today... and I came into this thread pretty down, between losing my g/f and being so indecisive on a career choice. I really appreciate everything everyone has said, and I'm extremely impressed.
I'm actually taking A&P, microbiology and chemistry right now, trying to make it into the nursing program in May, but I have had my doubts every day. For years I have quit and began things incessantly, so indecisive on what I want to do. I worked both IT jobs and kitchen remodeling jobs for that time, and it wasn't for me. I really like helping people (I am a personal trainer right now, for the last 5 months). I have tons of energy and don't mind working long hours. The classes I am taking are the only ones that have ever interested me. It seems right. I've talked to people in the profession. The hours are great, flexibility is there... the pay is excellent. But I guess I am afraid to pick one thing and go with it, I guess because I feel time is running out or something stupid like that. I think my biggest concern, for reasons that I think I understand, I was afraid of how it would affect my personal life with women, dating or being married.
This thread has helped me tremendously in pushing me towards a decision, and I just want to thank everyone for their opinions.
I would like to add one thing to the discussion: To those in relationships who are nurses or are dating relationship, how does shift work affect your relationship/marriage? Having to work weekends, nights... odd hours.
I think men who ignore gender stereotypes are HOT!!!! Nothing more boring than one of those cookie-cutter frat boys trying so hard to be like everyone else : )
I would like to add one thing to the discussion: To those in relationships who are nurses or are dating relationship, how does shift work affect your relationship/marriage? Having to work weekends, nights... odd hours.
Welcome to Allnurses!
It's not easy. My ex-spouse held a traditional 9-5 job and for about a year I worked 12-hour nights, and had to work every other weekend. The weekends I worked I slept. So the spouses days off I slept through. We were always having to tiptoe around each other because of opposite sleeping patterns. Eventually because of this I decided to switch to day shift. Nights was wearing the old body down as well. It worked out better, even though I still worked every other weekend.
You just learn to adjust, spending what quality time you can together.
When I was single working 3-11 shift, that was very isolating to me and hard to date because most people I knew were free in the evening time when I was working.
I'm sensing it's the maturity of those you are hanging around with. I also have gotten the advances from those who believe a nurse will sleep with anything anytime. Well, we're not all like that. Most women I have met are exscited that I'm into the profession and wish to see more of us. Most men can't understand why I would ever go back to school at my age into such a technical field.
BTW, I have never used nor will ever use the moniker "male" nurse. I do the same job as my female counterparts and hold the same title. I also found that the only thing that changes is your sense of humor and it changes for both male and female. No one but nurses could laugh at the same things we augh at.
Check the maturity level of those who think you less manly. When they truly understand what a man is, it will be too late, you'll have all new friends.
Specializes in He who hesitates is probably right....
It's my birthday today... and I came into this thread pretty down, between losing my g/f and being so indecisive on a career choice. I really appreciate everything everyone has said, and I'm extremely impressed.
I'm actually taking A&P, microbiology and chemistry right now, trying to make it into the nursing program in May, but I have had my doubts every day. For years I have quit and began things incessantly, so indecisive on what I want to do. I worked both IT jobs and kitchen remodeling jobs for that time, and it wasn't for me. I really like helping people (I am a personal trainer right now, for the last 5 months). I have tons of energy and don't mind working long hours. The classes I am taking are the only ones that have ever interested me. It seems right. I've talked to people in the profession. The hours are great, flexibility is there... the pay is excellent. But I guess I am afraid to pick one thing and go with it, I guess because I feel time is running out or something stupid like that. I think my biggest concern, for reasons that I think I understand, I was afraid of how it would affect my personal life with women, dating or being married.
This thread has helped me tremendously in pushing me towards a decision, and I just want to thank everyone for their opinions.
I would like to add one thing to the discussion: To those in relationships who are nurses or are dating relationship, how does shift work affect your relationship/marriage? Having to work weekends, nights... odd hours.
My wife and I have been married for 25 years. She has been a nurse for 27 years (she started when she was 2 ). I have dealt with a lot of absences over the years, but the children and I understood my wife's comittment to her career. I retired from career number one in 2004, and I'm now an RN working at the same hospital as my wife, which makes the schedule a lot easier to bear. There are days when the only time I see her is on the elevator, or passing in the hall at work. I think that if you have a solid relationship, the weekends/holidays/off-shifts don't matter.
As far as women being drawn to male nurses, I find that more than a few are drawn to me when their patient needs a boost up in bed .
Check the maturity level of those who think you less manly. When they truly understand what a man is, it will be too late, you'll have all new friends.
I agree!
LOL, nor get excited about the strangest things. Horray, so and so finally had a large BM or look at that beautiful clear, yellow urine.
To Roy's first post, man... I love you!!! ((disclaimer: this is in no way gay)) I wandered into this site just by chance, and wow, great group of people, and with this posting I wanted to share something that was bought for me by a friend of mine. She said it was all me, and she knew me in nursing school and how I cared for every patient that was in my charge, and that hasn't changed yet. I don't understand why people look at me, with the Army style short short hair cut (yes I was in the Army), six foot tall and all 185 lbs of me and say, "your a nurse?", or get the jokes about being gay, or Focker jokes. To tell the truth this is the only job that has made sense to me, as a man and as a human being. Why is it considered so unmanly to care for those that cannot care for themselves? Why is it considered so unmanly to wipe someone's bottom that can't do it for themselves? Is this only a job that a woman can perform? I say nay-nay. I think all of you will agree with me that what we do takes a certain type of person to be able to do what we do, whether male or female.
Anyhow I thought i'd share this with you all. This is something I keep by my door and look at before every shift I go on.
Nurses Prayer.
As I care for my patients today--Guide me Lord, each step of the way. Send me your wisdom from above, to perform each task with faith and love. Help me give comfort to all I see. Lord, I give my thanks to thee.
). I have dealt with a lot of absences over the years, but the children and I understood my wife's comittment to her career. I retired from career number one in 2004, and I'm now an RN working at the same hospital as my wife, which makes the schedule a lot easier to bear. There are days when the only time I see her is on the elevator, or passing in the hall at work. I think that if you have a solid relationship, the weekends/holidays/off-shifts don't matter.
scrubsnhugsRN
81 Posts
I think this makes all the difference. Both my parents are nurses, they met in Nursing school too...I know for a fact they have been very supportive and understanding of each other regarding issues at work, bad day or loosing one of thier patients..even though they worked in different departments with different dynamics they really knew the importantace of venting, crying and being supportive to each other.
On another note, I personally believe it makes a difference when there is a male nurse on the floor. It seems like it really changes the dynamics as opposed to all women on the floor. That is just my observation, and I think too that a man being a nurse is in no way a "less than" occupation. Majority of the male nurses I know are very manly....and great critical thinkers...just my opinion.