Why do parents get mad when you send their kids home???

OldDude · May 5, 2014

I've come to realize some people just want to lash out; regardless. One of my favorites is the parent who is mad at you because the x-ray you recommended is negative!!! I guess they would have felt better if the kid's bone was broken.

coughdrop.2.go, BSN, RN · May 5, 2014

I've come to realize some people just want to lash out; regardless. One of my favorites is the parent who is mad at you because the x-ray you recommended is negative!!! I guess they would have felt better if the kid's bone was broken.

Definitely. I rather send home 100 okay kids then keep that one really sick kid in class all day. I remember sending home one student and directed the parent to take to the emergency room on a suspicion of appendicitis. I am VERY paranoid about lower right quadrant pain. I ended up in the PICU at 10 years old with sepsis from a rupture appendix because my grandmother didn't take me to the hospital until I got extremely sick. Turns out that student had a ruptured ovarian cyst instead. But because it wasn't an appendix boy did I get an ear full of wasting her time off work and causing her to lose money. Never mind her daughter had to have surgery anyway.

JenTheSchoolRN, BSN, RN · May 6, 2014

Definitely. I rather send home 100 okay kids then keep that one really sick kid in class all day. I remember sending home one student and directed the parent to take to the emergency room on a suspicion of appendicitis. I am VERY paranoid about lower right quadrant pain. I ended up in the PICU at 10 years old with sepsis from a rupture appendix because my grandmother didn't take me to the hospital until I got extremely sick. Turns out that student had a ruptured ovarian cyst instead. But because it wasn't an appendix boy did I get an ear full of wasting her time off work and causing her to lose money. Never mind her daughter had to have surgery anyway.

LRQ always makes me think in the school setting! I had a student with described severe LRQ pain last week. No rebound pain, no fever, just constant sharp pain that increased over the course of the morning. I was on the phone to mom - not taking any chances there! Child's doctor even thought appendix and sent student to the ED. Not appendix, student still in pain, tests negative, still looking for cause. Luckily, the parent was appreciative of the call.

But...I have had a few parents be like "okay, but I can't get anyone to pick my student up" or "I can't give you written permission to dismiss them on their own" (HS kids here, they all get to and from school on their own usually public transit), and they just tell me to send them back to class. And these are vomiting or fever kids! Come on! The poor kid ends up spending the day with me and since I don't have a cot, they spend the day with their head down on a desk. I am trying to change this next year with a form that parents can sign at the beginning of the school year that will allow me to dismiss sick students home on their own with verbal parental permission. Of course, doesn't solve the issue for the kids I think are too sick to get themselves home safely...

100kids, BSN, RN · May 6, 2014

Some parents will get mad at you NO MATTER WHAT you do!! Some think we send home too often, some think we keep them too long. I just keep doing what I'm doing and try to let it roll off my back. I'm never going to make everyone happy.

Cream and sugar LPN · May 6, 2014

I am a mother of three- two in middle school and one in kindergarten. I just don't understand why some parents want to lash out at the nurse! Why is it the nurses fault for providing care, sending home a sick child or suggesting a trip to the ER when He/She suspects a potentially dangerous outcome for their child if not seen? I just don't understand that mentality!

Also, as a parent you should ALWAYS have a plan B if you can't get to school within an hour to pick up your child. At our school we have three contacts that the nurse can utilize if the parent can't be reached. Those contacts are made aware that in the event that I can't be reached they are allowed to pick up my sick child.

T.H.R.N. · May 6, 2014

I always want to say,"Oh, you should have told the doctor when you delivered that you wanted the child that was never going to cause you to spend money, miss work, or use up your precious time." SMH.

Had one indignant dad livid that I interrupted his "bowling guys day out" to come pick up his 103 degrees of temp vomiting kinder kiddo at 11:00 am. It's called responsibility. What the what??????

Wave Watcher · May 6, 2014

I meet each year with the new Kindergarten parents. I always tell them that if they send their child to school sick then they might as well park in the parking lot and wait because they will be getting a call very shortly. If a child threw up before coming to school they think it's the greatest thing....you might as well give them a mega-horn because they will tell it to every teacher they see walking down the hallway. I don't understand parents who medicate a child for a fever before school or send them when they still have vomit on their shirts from throwing up 10 minutes ago at home. :angrybird11:

AmyRN303, BSN, RN · May 6, 2014

I've had a couple of pickups that had me shaking my head (banged knee on the playground) but most often it's for a legit reason. Worst ever (and completely legitimate) was my son who started throwing up as the kids were lining up for the bus to go home. It happens, and not on any predictable schedule. (I really felt for the school nurse that day...and for my fourth grader, mortified at having vomited in the classroom all over his shoes. If I'd even had one inkling he wasn't feeling well I would have kept him home, poor bub.)

I can't understand why parents get upset about children being sent home. I don't know if it's the interruption of their own schedule or if it's a tendency to minimize the possibility of something potentially serious, but it sucks. I had a rotation in a busy urban school nursing office and it amazed me how often parents would come up with an excuse not to pick up their child or would get upset that we needed to send them to the ED (a very obvious ankle fx or a severe asthma attack)

And to rant further (I am not a school nurse, but I gotta rant)...WHY do they send their kids to school with that fever or having vomited that morning? Why? Not only are they exposing the rest of them to whatever they have, but that little one would feel much better at home resting in a familiar place than being at school with the potential to not make it to the bathroom on time.

OldDude · May 6, 2014

I might as well throw this one into the ante; this may be number one on my pet peeve list...."BUT THIS WILL RUIN THEIR PERFECT ATTENDANCE." AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! There is no telling how much absenteeism is generated by this stupid perfect attendance award. :arghh:

fetch, BSN, RN · May 6, 2014

I have one student who was having asthma issues that got progressively worse as he sat in my clinic for abt 30 minutes - at first it was just SOB but by the end it was a full-blown attack. Had lots of trouble calling parents that day and in the days prior (trying to get an inhaler and MD order at school) -- but lo and behold, once I left a voicemail that said "I'm going to call 911 in 2 minutes" I got an immediate phone call back. I guess hearing that your child can't breathe isn't a big deal until emergency services gets involved.

That said, I've had problems with teachers wanting me to call home for mud on pants. Luckily the wife and I are in agreement with this: our theoretical future children will have spare clothes in their backpack (or clinic, or classroom, or where ever) and if anything happens that isn't biohazard then they can just suck it up! I would be extremely irate if a teacher called for me to pick up my child for mud.

tictac · May 6, 2014

I love it when I send home for possible fracture and not only do they NOT take the child for an x-ray, but the child reports to me first thing in the morning, telling me their parents said to go to the nurse if it hurts. Makes me want to scream!