WHY are nurses so catty??

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I swear sometimes i don't know WHY i'm in this profession. My mom works at a job as a RN and was limping one day. Her knee bothers her from time to time, etc...she's overweight (and working on it) but it gives her trouble at times. Instead of someone ASKING her what was wrong, one of the nurses ran to the manager and told her that my mom couldn't "keep up" and didn't seem to be quick enough for the job cuz she seemed disabled. This is a NEW job for my mom, so she's still on orientation technically. The manager called her in and made her take off today to go to Occ health and have it tested so she could be cleared to work. WTF?? She told her "we'll figure out what to do pending what the doc says." so she didn't work today and lost that time worked. Of course she went to occ health, the Doc tested her etc...and cleared her no problem. She told him she was excercising, walking and taking meds for it. Forgot to wrap it that day, but was not having any trouble SINCE that day. I have 2 problems with this. 1 is that NOBODY asked her what was up with her knee that day. NOBODY. 2 is that the manager just jumped on it because of what this other nurse SAID. WHY do nurses feel like they have to police each other's performance? UGH i'm just disgusted.

Specializes in most of em.

Not only do we "eat our young", but we "drive away our older nurses". We are so intolerant of any weakness.

I'm sorry this happened, but until we begin not only nursing our patients, but supporting and nursing each other I don't see this changing.

Best wishes:smokin:

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Really sorry that had to happen. I dont think, though, that is "nurses" per se. It was that specific person or the way certain people are in general. Of course, they could have asked her. Im glad that everything worked out in the end. You always need to watch yourself, unfortunately, when it comes to people especially those you dont really know. At a new job, maybe people are looking for errors. I know in other professions if you are new, they watch every little thing. I personally think that person (not nurse) had issues with overweight people (not specifically your mom). That is her issue that she will need to overcome. Again, Im glad that things worked out for the best with your mom. At least, they cant come at her again with that garbage when her knee or leg is bothering her.

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Why are nurses so catty? Because nurses are mostly women and women are just catty.

I disagree with the above statement...I worked in a predominantly male environment (mining) and regardless of your sex...people can be catty a times, alway, and some never.

If I have a problem with anyone ever...I deal with that person. If there is no resolution, we follow the chain of command. Funny how when the next step arises, the person story changes and clams up.

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Wow! I can't imagine anyone still having such bigoted views and women actually agreeing with these views! I baffles me!!

I am taking Critical Thinking and we have covered this extensively earlier today.

Sad thing is about bigoted thinking is that when someone gets a perception such as this or even "all teen drivers are reckless" that when one encounters one who is not as they perceive, instead of changing their view on the whole picture,they just say this person is an exception which isn't really true.

Think about this- what do you think of when you hear catholic priest? Child molestor most likely comes to mind these days. But the truth is, only 3-4% of catholic priests have ever been accused of this behavior!!

Change your views and your perceptions and the way you analyze a situation or perception. Look at the WHOLE picture please.

Saying that, I also have to say that I am in pre-nursing now with women I will be in the nursing program this fall with and they have been the best!! We have all been very helpful and courteous to each other in any way possible!

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I totally agree with you regarding nurses being so "catty." My best friend and I (we are co-workers in an emergency room) have discussed this many times. It is very disinheartening how mean some nurses can be! Our hospital's labor and delivery unit closed, and some of the L & D nurses came to the ER to orient...personally, I was glad, because I happen to think that it would be a blessing to have an experienced L & D nurse in the ER in the middle of the night, especially when someone who has never had any prenatal care delivers a tiny, premature infant in the parking lot outside the ER! (or many other scenarios)..I watched one or two of the ER nurses absolutely RIDE an L & D nurse until she was a sweating, stuttering, holding-back-the tears mess!!! Actually, I couldn't figure if it was because she was an L & D nurse, or if it was because she was gay...which was the worse "crime?" I questioned the two nurse who tortured this nurse; their response to my questioning why they treated her this way was met with shrugs and laughs! I have also worked as an agency nurse, and on rare occasions, I have been totally DUMPED on and had the staff nurses act like a*#holes; when I asked to speak with the charge nurse, her answer was, "because you are working side by side with us and making $10-15 more an hour!" I replied that she, too, could work agency; no one was stopping her. Her reply was, "Oh, I could never do that.." (whatever that is supposed to mean....)Also, for the most part, the MALE nurses don't seem to participate in this crap; in fact, every male nurse, AND most female nurse, have been wonderfully helpful & grateful when I worked with them. There's always a few miserable women wherever you go!!! (it's not you, it's THEM!!!) good luck..if you are one of those miserable ones, think about the impact that you have on your co-workers..if you are miserable enough, maybe all the skilled, hard-working, pleasant nurses will LEAVE and your new co-workers will be miserable, too! Imagine that!:rolleyes:

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I work with the most negative,hateful, catty, backstabbing, gossiping woman I ever met:madface: . I have seen her destroy the morale of an entire shift with her negativity and gossiping!!

I have had so many problems with her that we even resorted to conflict management counseling for the both of us.

The only thing that helped our situation was me changing shifts:lol2: . No, I didnt change because of her but it sure did help ME when we didnt work together :D

I have been dealing with this woman for 2 years now and she never changes *sigh*.

What has changed is how I deal with her. I just simply made the decision that I wasnt going to allow her to get "under my skin" anymore. I am her supervisor and I act professionally with her and nothing else. Since my superiors are well aware of our situation, they do her counseling when required and I just dont get involved. Makes my life a whole lot happier lol

Oh sure, she still loves me with alllll her heart and tells people as often as she can what a good supervisor I am:D

I have never met anyone that can make me as angry as this woman! ever!

She is the one that told all the LPNs that work with me that I was going to cause them all to lose their nursing licenses when I told them they could draw up N insulin and R insulin together in equal amounts if they were out of 50/50 insulin. *yall should see me rolling my eyes right now*

We ended up having an insulin inservice to educate them all on insulin types instead of trying to educate her seperately. oh...I got to give the inservice :wink2:

but recently a supervisor took an order from the doc over the phone, told this nurse verbally what the order was so she could write it on the mar and go give the med right then (stat order). Unfortunately, the supervisor said one thing but she heard another. The patient died a few hours later. It was horrible for them both! More than likely the patient did not die from the med error but they were both horrified, upset...you name it, they must have felt it. My heart broke for them both. Med errors could happen to ANYONE! It was common for one of the nurses to be at her med cart and say "soanso needs...." then me call the doc and write the order in the chart and say "she said give....". we did it all the time in that manner.

so needless to say, the talk around the building was major...ranging from sympathy to glee because of who it was. I will be honest with yall...I had to talk to God about it before anything else because that little part of me that IS catty wanted to take joy in her pain. But I didnt, and I am glad. I defended her to anyone that said anything negative to me. I reminded them all how it could have been any of us and how it happened was something we did all the time. When they both came back to work a few days later, I hugged them both and welcomed them back.

This past monday at work, I found out this very same nurse that I cant stand but defended professionally is now talking about me because I DIDNT say anything about her. ?????????????????? She is asking alot of people "tell me the truth, I know she talked about me"

lol I give up!!!

Guys there are always going to be people like this that we work with no matter where and what we do. The only thing that matters is how YOU react to them. Let them "waller" in their own misery, dont get in the hog pen with them.

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Specializes in home & public health, med-surg, hospice.

This past monday at work, I found out this very same nurse that I cant stand but defended professionally is now talking about me because I DIDNT say anything about her. ?????????????????? She is asking alot of people "tell me the truth, I know she talked about me"

lol I give up!!!

ROTFLMAO!!!

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Not only do we "eat our young", but we "drive away our older nurses". We are so intolerant of any weakness.

I'm sorry this happened, but until we begin not only nursing our patients, but supporting and nursing each other I don't see this changing.

Best wishes:smokin:

It's also the fault of management, who encourages this type of enviorment.

I worked for a supervisor, who has driven off several excellent RN's, who always got excellent evaluations. Once this supervisor came on board, she would single out one nurse and "micromanage" them to the point that they quit. She encourages other members of the team to "tattletale" on each other.

I got her "special treatment" for almost a year and then changed to another shift to get away. I've had no problems since then, and my current supervisor has told me that upper management is aware how this supervisor operates, but is not going to do anything about it.

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Specializes in Psych.
Wow! I can't imagine anyone still having such bigoted views and women actually agreeing with these views! I baffles me!!

I am taking Critical Thinking and we have covered this extensively earlier today.

Sad thing is about bigoted thinking is that when someone gets a perception such as this or even "all teen drivers are reckless" that when one encounters one who is not as they perceive, instead of changing their view on the whole picture,they just say this person is an exception which isn't really true.

Think about this- what do you think of when you hear catholic priest? Child molestor most likely comes to mind these days. But the truth is, only 3-4% of catholic priests have ever been accused of this behavior!!

Change your views and your perceptions and the way you analyze a situation or perception. Look at the WHOLE picture please.

Saying that, I also have to say that I am in pre-nursing now with women I will be in the nursing program this fall with and they have been the best!! We have all been very helpful and courteous to each other in any way possible!

Do you live in Neverland? Women (people in general) are catty. It's a fact of life. I am glad you have supportive colleagues, but in the real world, this is not always the case. It's sad, but it's true. And some folks even use the very nature of cattiness to get themselves a leg up in the world. I swear, it's hard to trust anyone sometimes. Even the sweetest, most trustworthy people will use other's people's weaknesses and shortcomings to give themselves an advantage. I hate to sound negative, but it's true. Watch your back.:scrying:

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Specializes in Psych.
I work with the most negative,hateful, catty, backstabbing, gossiping woman I ever met:madface: . I have seen her destroy the morale of an entire shift with her negativity and gossiping!!

I have had so many problems with her that we even resorted to conflict management counseling for the both of us.

The only thing that helped our situation was me changing shifts:lol2: . No, I didnt change because of her but it sure did help ME when we didnt work together :D

I have been dealing with this woman for 2 years now and she never changes *sigh*.

What has changed is how I deal with her. I just simply made the decision that I wasnt going to allow her to get "under my skin" anymore. I am her supervisor and I act professionally with her and nothing else. Since my superiors are well aware of our situation, they do her counseling when required and I just dont get involved. Makes my life a whole lot happier lol

Oh sure, she still loves me with alllll her heart and tells people as often as she can what a good supervisor I am:D

I have never met anyone that can make me as angry as this woman! ever!

She is the one that told all the LPNs that work with me that I was going to cause them all to lose their nursing licenses when I told them they could draw up N insulin and R insulin together in equal amounts if they were out of 50/50 insulin. *yall should see me rolling my eyes right now*

We ended up having an insulin inservice to educate them all on insulin types instead of trying to educate her seperately. oh...I got to give the inservice :wink2:

but recently a supervisor took an order from the doc over the phone, told this nurse verbally what the order was so she could write it on the mar and go give the med right then (stat order). Unfortunately, the supervisor said one thing but she heard another. The patient died a few hours later. It was horrible for them both! More than likely the patient did not die from the med error but they were both horrified, upset...you name it, they must have felt it. My heart broke for them both. Med errors could happen to ANYONE! It was common for one of the nurses to be at her med cart and say "soanso needs...." then me call the doc and write the order in the chart and say "she said give....". we did it all the time in that manner.

so needless to say, the talk around the building was major...ranging from sympathy to glee because of who it was. I will be honest with yall...I had to talk to God about it before anything else because that little part of me that IS catty wanted to take joy in her pain. But I didnt, and I am glad. I defended her to anyone that said anything negative to me. I reminded them all how it could have been any of us and how it happened was something we did all the time. When they both came back to work a few days later, I hugged them both and welcomed them back.

This past monday at work, I found out this very same nurse that I cant stand but defended professionally is now talking about me because I DIDNT say anything about her. ?????????????????? She is asking alot of people "tell me the truth, I know she talked about me"

lol I give up!!!

Guys there are always going to be people like this that we work with no matter where and what we do. The only thing that matters is how YOU react to them. Let them "waller" in their own misery, dont get in the hog pen with them.

Excellent advice and oh too true. Talk to the Boss(and I don't mean your supervisor), come to work, do your job to the best of your ability, and let the chips fall where they may. And, while you're at it, "pray for your enemies and those who persecute you". I know from experience that this is the best way to deal w/people who try to start trouble. They are definitly out there and they need our help. And we all need the help of the Boss (and I don't mean your supervisor).:wink2:

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Please don't group ALL women into the catty category is all I am saying. If you re-read my post maybe you will understand what i am saying- if you change your PERCEPTION- how you look at a situation (in this case the reference that all women are catty)-things will be different.

THEY (catty people) are actually the exception, not the norm. Maybe it just seems that way because they cause such misery.

Personally I choose to feel pity for someone who would act like that as most likely they are unhappy in their lives and that carries over into their work and interactions with other people.

why would you personally attack me with your neverland comment? Not all places and people are as you are making them out to be.

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Specializes in Psych.
Please don't group ALL women into the catty category is all I am saying. If you re-read my post maybe you will understand what i am saying- if you change your PERCEPTION- how you look at a situation (in this case the reference that all women are catty)-things will be different.

THEY (catty people) are actually the exception, not the norm. Maybe it just seems that way because they cause such misery.

Personally I choose to feel pity for someone who would act like that as most likely they are unhappy in their lives and that carries over into their work and interactions with other people.

why would you personally attack me with your neverland comment? are you one of "them" too?

Sorry, didn't mean to personally attack you. And I KNOW that not all women are like that. AND I understand how perception alters our reality. AND I can also see how our perceptions can cloud the whole picture b/c ONE CATTY PERSON can cause SO MUCH DAMAGE! But THAT IS THE PROBLEM, one catty person can cause so much damage! As I wrote, guard your back and pray for those who persecute you. They are out there, I assure you. Keep looking up!

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