Why are nurses so backbiting?

llg, PhD, RN · Dec 30, 2015

Lots of reasons. Do a search: you'll find lots of threads on this.

My personal opinion is that it is human nature -- and would happen more in other workplaces if the working conditions were the same. We are a group of people who work very closely together, doing essentially the same job as staff RN's -- jockeying for social position and power within the "flock." It is natural to try to establish a "pecking order."

Men do it all the time in their career fields, but it takes different forms that are considered more socially acceptable. In some men's fields, the ranks are formally designated -- in the military for example (where people get medals -- badges for good performance -- and the people with the most medals and stripes and stars, etc. are at the top of the hierarchy.) In factories, there are union foremen, team leaders, crew chiefs, etc. There are also informal, social leaders who achieve that status through social maneuvering, bullying, charisma, etc. Most workplaces have a pecking order formed by a combination of formal recognition and informal social behaviors.

loriangel14, RN · Dec 30, 2015

Don't see it where I work. I love my coworkers.

allnurses Guide · Dec 30, 2015

I don't see it where I work either. Small rural hospital where the nurses work acute, L&D, postpartum, ER, surgery, outpatient, hospice.

When I was the Nursing Supervisor, I did all of the above except hospice. Most of the nurses I've ever worked with were not "backbiting".

There were of course grumpy, rude people at times but they weren't tolerated for very long.

You just have to stand up for yourself and not play the games people play.

There are "bullies" or rude people in every walk of life.

As Eleanor Roosevelt said "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent".

Just don't put up with being treated badly.

SmilingBluEyes · Dec 30, 2015

I am fortunate to have found a workplace, while certainly not perfect, where we help each other, are a team and very little of this goes on. I agree with llg; it's not exclusive to nursing. I was in the military and there were different ways people interacted with each other that included some more socially-accepted ways to bring each other down.

I would not let what you hear discourage you. Yes it happens, but not as universally as you may have been told.

Farawyn · Dec 30, 2015

I don't have it in my workplace, nor have I personally experienced it.

That being said, I love llg's post. I wish I could like it more than once.

roser13, ASN, RN · Dec 30, 2015

This is my second career, 5th workplace as a nurse, and I have not ever seen anything remotely resembling NETY or what OP is saying here in either field. There is the normal dynamic that happens between folks who work together: some folks play nice and some don't. This is true in all workplaces that employ humans.

To me, it's simple: Avoid the folks who don't play nice; don't let them bully you; work hard; don't indulge in gossip; and be a good teammate. Never had a problem.

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN · Dec 30, 2015

I don't see it in my workplace.

Ruger8mm · Dec 30, 2015

I see it in the hospital. I see the "keep your head down and don't ever correct a teacher" and I've seen it in my current place of work. Why does it seem that nurses want to one up each other or socially isolate people?

it seems that way because Nursing is primarily occupied by women.

nursej22, MSN, RN · Dec 30, 2015

I only experienced this once, and the manager encouraged it. When I wouldn't play along, they tried to discipline me on trumped up BS (thank you, union!).

As with any workplace, though, it's best to feel things out before you get critical.

TriciaJ, RN · Dec 30, 2015

It's almost always a function of poor management, no matter what type of workplace. If the leadership is weak or nonexistent, then people will try to elevate themselves, some at the expense of others. If strong leadership is provided, the low functioning personnel are weeded out and the overbearing ones are contained.

In predominantly male workplaces, self-promotion is still seen as "assertive" and "competitive". In a predominantly female workplace the same behaviour is labelled as "******" and "underhanded". So in addition to weak leadership in places, sexism is still very much alive.

Farawyn · Dec 30, 2015

It's almost always a function of poor management, no matter what type of workplace. If the leadership is weak or nonexistent, then people will try to elevate themselves, some at the expense of others. If strong leadership is provided, the low functioning personnel are weeded out and the overbearing ones are contained.
In predominantly male workplaces, self-promotion is still seen as "assertive" and "competitive". In a predominantly female workplace the same behaviour is labelled as "******" and "underhanded". So in addition to weak leadership in places, sexism is still very much alive.

As we see from the above post from a male nurse.