I am a young determined person who has started FNP school. My dilemma is I will complete my FNP program at 29 years old. I am married but I have no kids right now.
I want two kids and I have been hearing stories from older friends who had problems conceiving so I guess I'm a bit worried. I do plan to stay home at least a year after my kids are born and then I will go back to work.
My question is should I plan on getting pregnant during my last year of school and have my baby then??? In this case I will have my FNP liscence,,,,,and will not work 2-3 years after graduation and then try to get into the workforce. Will this be difficult?
OR I could graduate…work one year then I'll be 30 and then take off 2-3 years (to have 2 kids)…so I will have one year of FNP experience under my belt?
There will never be a "perfect time" and just know that "plans" hardly ever go as planned. My "plan" was to get pregnant during nursing school, have a baby right after, take 6 months off, then start work. Well……lets just say I had a lot of bad luck. I finally stayed pregnant (with my 3rd pregnancy in less than a year) when I was a few months into a job as a new grad. I had my baby, moved across country, broke my arm, had a hard time finding a job with only a year experience yada yada yada…… There's a good side and bad side to everything and you never know what will happen. Choose and make the best decision you can now, with the information that you have.
Nutmegge thank you for the comment. OF course that would have been hard…but you are right…adjust to life and roll it with it.
I am not sure what I will do but lee lee, I do consider what you have said…..It can't just go "as planned" of course….it is creating another human being ha! That is why I am hesitant to do that in the last year of school (what if I have a complicated pregnancy etc etc).
I agree there is no perfect time, there will always be other work/family things going on! I don't know if I would want to take 2-3 years off between certification and getting my first job. You could potentially lose a lot of that information you learned that you haven't put into practice yet.
An example of no right time. After trying for over 2 years we pursued infertility treatment. I found out our treatments were a success around the same time I got into NP school. I went into labor during spring break my 1st semester of NP school! It was a whirlwind time but it all worked out in the end. I have been working as a NP for 2 years and a son who just turned 3!
Specializes in Cardiology, Cardiothoracic Surgical.
Assuming your spouse has a stable job with good income, and your fertilities are intact, I don't see why you can't do both. Work a year as an NP, start getting pregnant then, then go part time when the kids are born, then go full time again once they hit preschool age. If you're creative enough or have engaged grandparents, you may not have to pay for much childcare over that interim.
Our mothers' generation figured this out for us already with full time work and raising kids.
I would agree with the other poster that you should have some baseline fertility testing done and not assume that all is ok. It would be helpful to find out now, not later, if there are any issues with fertility in order to make the best decision.
I don't understand why people make mean comments. She's just looking for advice-if you're not interested in giving it, move on.
When I graduated NP school I had a 14 month old and I was 5 months pregnant. It was tough! But, if you have a supportive family and husband anything is possible.
I think this is an absolutely ok place to come to with the question of when to merge your NP career with the desire to have kids. We had lots of classmates who had children while in school and they managed to make it all work. Spend some time on the blog "Mothers in Medicine" (MDs discuss the trials of medical school/residency/MD practice that come with having a family also) and you'll realize while it is going to be busy for you, it in no way is impossible when compared to being a resident.
With that said, I'm going to tell you the hard reality of being an NP and a mom: It can kind of stink. If you work full time in an office 9-5 you need to know up front that really and truly you will be working like 8:30-6 pm. When your kids are young, they will be in daycare for 9 hrs a day. You will get home from picking them up and then you will be torn between wanting to just be with them and realizing you also have to get dinner, give them a bath, throw in some laundry, clean up after dinner and blah blah blah. Hopefully you will have a supportive spouse.
And then everyone thinks it gets all better when the kids start school. WRONG. Then the kids start having a few after school activities...soccer at @ 4:00. Evening church activities that start right at 6. How are you going to do that ? Oh...and then there are days off from school which these days = almost one school holiday a month and then the extended breaks of Spring break, Christmas break and almost three months of summer. So then you gotta figure out if your kid is going to go to "camps" every day during their break from school. At about 3rd grade the kids start HATING to go to the camps, they want to stay home, chill out and be with you...but nope, you have to drag them out of their bed on their day off and take them to school aged daycare or a camp.
So..THOSE are the things you need to start thinking about. Oh yeah, and what are you going to do when your kid is sick for the millionth time? Because they get sick a lot when they are in daycare. And back in the day when you were a staff RN you could call in sick and they would pull up a float nurse to take your shift and life was great. But as an NP, you've got 15 patients scheduled to see you and everyone has a full schedule too...whose going to see those patients?
So think about all of that. Think about how you want your career as an NP to be. Think about who you want to raise your kids. I say all of this not to be harsh but for you to know the reality of being a full time working NP mom. If you don't have choices then fine, you gotta do what you gotta do. My daughter has certainly seen a bit of daycare and she is none for the worse. But I gotta tell you those kids who spend 9 hrs a day there every.single.day...it's heartbreaking.
Farawyn
12,646 Posts
I think you should start...right now. This second.