I don't know why but that statement makes my jaw clench up everytime I hear it.
I had a patient the other day ask me how I was going to insert a foley since "the head is down there, wont that hurt the baby?" For the love god, people .... come on .. 2 HOLES! SERIOUSLY!
and my favorite of all time ...
"Does that machine beep everytime I dilate?" .. this one left me speechless
Please share your "omg, no she didn't say/ask that" quotes
How about......"I need a corificeat.....and enough milk and diapers to last till next week when I can go the WIC office." Have these people not been pregnant for 9 months?!?!?!
AMEN! If it wouldn't get me dinged on customer service, I'd remind them that this is their baby and THEY are responsible for providing for it. Unfortunately our government has provided for far too long and for far too many, and now they've come to expect it. :angryfire
FOB or Gramma or whomever is at the delivery, is present the entire time, has not left the baby's side and then asks me in the transition nursery - how much does the baby weigh or how long is the baby?
I know they are excited but they have been there the entire time so they should know we haven't done that yet. But I smile and say haven't done it yet but getting ready to. :):)
Or "when will my son get his ceasarian" (aka circumsized).
Part of our role is to educate our patients without judging what we feel they should or should not know. Everyone had to learn what they know at some point, some just learn certain things later than others.
Alright Scrooge. I think the OP is just trying to have a little fun.
as a side note with the baby away from mom issues, 70% of our patients are telling us to keep the baby in the nursery, not the other way around. We have tried to encourage rooming in and bonding but for whatever reasons a large majority of our patient population are not in to it, but we keep trying! :)
Specializes in med-surg, rehab, oncology, ob, peds.
the only one I can think of came from my student nursing days...
While observing a c-sec (this was a repeat section mom), the FOB, while the dr was cutting through some scar tissue, had the audacity to say "WOW it smells like a BBQ in here!" to which the dr replied "I don't want to know what kind of BBQ's you go to!"...everyone busted a gut laughing but seriously
How about when you go to perform a sve and someone asks "do you need a light." Nope!!!!! but thanks!!
or
jokingly while i emptied a foley i said feel better now?? and the patient replied "i didn't feel it." ok ok, i was KIDDING!!! maybe nurse jokes should be saved for nurses!! hehe
bahhaha LoL that is sooo true!! Usually after the 2nd time you explain to them that how high up the ctx. goes does not mean thats how strong it is they start to get it. Drives me crazy too!
"Don't bother me, I want to sleep." Sorry, but you were admitted for DKA, and we are monitoring your blood sugar and blood pressure per doctor's orders to save you from yourself...
I love it when they send you out of the room for 18 different things and on the last thing they say, "I would have felt bad giving you a list." PLEASE give me the list right away instead of making me run back and forth so many times.
33-weeker
412 Posts
AMEN! If it wouldn't get me dinged on customer service, I'd remind them that this is their baby and THEY are responsible for providing for it. Unfortunately our government has provided for far too long and for far too many, and now they've come to expect it. :angryfire