I don't know why but that statement makes my jaw clench up everytime I hear it.
I had a patient the other day ask me how I was going to insert a foley since "the head is down there, wont that hurt the baby?" For the love god, people .... come on .. 2 HOLES! SERIOUSLY!
and my favorite of all time ...
"Does that machine beep everytime I dilate?" .. this one left me speechless
Please share your "omg, no she didn't say/ask that" quotes
Actually, this is something that irks me about my preceptor. We have a lot of different non-English speaking immigrants, and not all of them speak Spanish. But when it comes time to push, she'll always say: "okay, mama, let's make caca" no matter whether they understand Make or Caca.
It's like her generic phrase for all None English Speaking Brown People. Makes me want to scream.
Granted, I'm not a L&D nurse yet. My understanding from the context is that it's a lovely thing the really sensitive and compassionate men ask for when the OB is stitching up the episiotomy. The hubby of a friend asked the MD to "stitch her up tighter" so future 'marital relations' would be better :angryfire
Exactly-nice, huh? Cuz I'm sure that is the first thing on her mind...phew
Actually, this is something that irks me about my preceptor. We have a lot of different non-English speaking immigrants, and not all of them speak Spanish. But when it comes time to push, she'll always say: "okay, mama, let's make caca" no matter whether they understand Make or Caca.
It's like her generic phrase for all None English Speaking Brown People. Makes me want to scream.
ARRRGGGGGGHHHHH!
(phew, thanks!)
Oh i agree.
My personal favorites are the ones that talk VERY loudly to non-English speaking pts. IN English, like the volume is suddenly going to make them bilingual.
Ahhh yes... The innocent and idealistic fantacy world of the nursing student rears it's pretty head once again!
I remember those days!
I may be innocent and idealistic too as a 50+ LPN student. But in my other working fields, I always realized that the lack of knowledge on my client's part meant job security for me. If they knew everything, why would they need me? There are so many "common sense" things that I have learned in nursing school that I never knew.
You know, it's been 4 years or so since I've staffed the OB floor, and so many times I miss that, but reading this thread made me laugh and in a way, understand WHY I miss some of that stuff!
" Do you know what you are doing?" I had a patient ask that question when I came in to start her IV. I said, "Well, I did stay at a Holiday Inn last night and I did watch it done on tv so I think I can get this!" Her eyes were wide open and I said, " I've done this several hundreds of times so yes I know what I'm doing!!
Oh Please! Can I add one??! On more than one occasion I've been to a meconium or other shaky delivery and as we're suctioing, stiming,bagging the baby a family member will yell over to us, "How much do he weigh??!"
Oh Please! Can I add one??! On more than one occasion I've been to a meconium or other shaky delivery and as we're suctioing, stiming,bagging the baby a family member will yell over to us, "How much do he weigh??!"
That aside, why is there such an obsession over the baby's weight? It's not as if they've put a bet on it, or understand the significance. Puzzling.
My favorite was when I worked at a very small hospital (they didn't do Epidural's because we only had one anethestist) so we had a patient who was yelling and screaming and the doctor popped her on the leg and said "stop all that racket you did scream like that when you got this way." and the patient said "no doc, that felt good, this hurts like hell".
Or the first time I had a post partum patient that when I walked in the room (Mind you I was only 19) and the patient said "Nurse my cat hurts" in the back of my mind I thought why the hell is she telling me about her hurt cat, I said "Your what?" and she pointed at her lady parts and said "My cat hurts.":
Another one at my very small hospital at the time was a teenager in labor. We only gave Stadol and Versed for the pain. When she would have a contration she would wake up cussing like a sailor, but as soon as the contration ended she was snoring:zzzzz like a freight train:sleep: . Her mother come yelling at me, can't you see she is in pain give her something, (this was during her cussing spree) when she fell back to sleep and was snoring I looked at the mother and said "Yes mame, I can give her some more, but I will also send her permenately asleep if I do." With the next contration the mother was telling the daughter to shut up and breath that she already had her pain medicine and was going to have to take the pain like an adult.
epiphany
543 Posts
Actually, this is something that irks me about my preceptor. We have a lot of different non-English speaking immigrants, and not all of them speak Spanish. But when it comes time to push, she'll always say: "okay, mama, let's make caca" no matter whether they understand Make or Caca.
It's like her generic phrase for all None English Speaking Brown People. Makes me want to scream.
ARRRGGGGGGHHHHH!
(phew, thanks!)