1/9: What I learned this week - Worst. Vagina. EVER.

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I still can't believe it's January! Where did 2015 go?!

If your unit is like mine at all, brace yourselves.... Respiratory failure is coming. Out of 10 different patients since 1/1, I've had only one non-respiratory failure patient. Only two of those had sputum cultures with the same type of bug. That bug was a rare one for adults, too, so it's been fun, to say the least. All's fun and games until you get a patient who has no concept of covering a cough.

Regardless, Ixchel Medical Center and Chez Ixchel have both been full of lessons. Hard to narrow this week's list, but for the sake of people actually reaching the bottom of it, I did. [emoji5]️

This week, I have learned.....

1. I am fully convinced I have smelled the worst possible smelling lady parts.

2. Apparently I am a great big baby about getting invasive procedures done on me.

3. Receiving unsettling news about your health is much less unsettling when the doctor is hot.

4. Also, receiving unsettling news about your health gets easier to process emotionally with each new diagnosis.

5. It seriously sucks to clock out from caring for a whole unit of respiratory failure (half dead) patients only to come home to your smoker spouse.

6. The first couple of times you get asked, "Am I going to die?", it's a little creepy, until you have enough experience in nursing to be able to answer, "not on my watch!" with a reassuring smile, followed with, "you will be okay." But then, when someone actually does die on that admission, after asking repeatedly, it goes back to being creepy again.

7. My unit tends to be a bit wild, so staff turnover ends up being high. This changes the "personality" of night shift a lot, since the new to nursing newbies like night shift. I like the night shift personality right now and hope the newbies stay.

8. It still feels weird to be the most experienced nurse on a shift besides charge.

9. I might lose my shizz if we don't get psych on consult. As much as our hospitalists feel adequate to handle psych, they simply aren't.

10. You should have 1-2 people on your "speed dial" (hahaha!!! You guys remember speed dial?!) as your medical procedure go to people for those times you can't do medical procedures on yourself. (i.e. Stitches removal in hard to reach places.) (Thank you for that idea, Dogen!)

11. My primary care doesn't feel qualified to remove a mole from my shoulder because it's too big and looks like someone more specialized should do it. (This is the 5th item in this week's list related to this topic. I may need some tranquilizers, to stop thinking about this.)

12. I met my favorite patient ever. EVER. I want to take him home and name him Grandpa.

13. It's hard enough to stop being lazy after night shifts when I get an ideal schedule. When my schedule sucks, it's impossible. Seriously, ugh.

14. BEST THING EVER! (That may be an exaggeration.) Medscape sent out an article saying contact precautions for MRSA and VRE are no more effective at preventing transmission than standard/universal.

15. Our legal system may be corrupt, or be inefficient, but that doesn't mean a suspect is innocent.

Phish, anybody? (Don't worry, Farawyn, no one dies in this one.)

So, my loves, what have YOU learned this week?

1) I had my first "super packed" shift in ER when we didn't have enough beds or nurses and pts. were in hallways and corners (and they were actual patients, not healthy patients.

2) When a patient doesn't look right to you, and you take a second to check vitals and their heart rate is 135 and they're white count is super elevated and so are their bands...well, I'm developing that instinct! Of looking at a patient and realizing 'oh, there's something going on'

3) When you're not feeling well, it's better to call in sick and take care of yourself instead of pushing through it. That way you don't get SUPER sick and are back and better the next week.

4) Family can listen to the hard stories (both parents are RNs) but if they already have a bad opinion of your hospital...they might ask why you're still there even though they and you know you signed a contract.

5) It's okay NOT to pick up the overtime shift.

Specializes in ICU.

I've learned many things so far in 2016.

1. I was not ready for my son to turn 10. Absolutely crazy how fast time flies.

2. I can be nice to my ex-husband's mistress. The woman he cheated on me with who was a former friend. It was the first time I had seen her since before the divorce. I handled it well.

3. As much as I love my boyfriend and we are great, I'm honestly scared to death for us to buy a house together and start the next chapter of our lives. I'm sure it has to do with number 2.

4. I needed a few more weeks before starting class again. It's hard to start class when it's 8 degrees outside.

5. I survived my parent's visit!!!

6. I really hope this semester goes fast. I graduate in 5 months!!!

Aww!! I totally got a warm fuzzy. ;) I'm drinking wine, marathoning LOTR extended edition, and cleaning my house. Thought of you too! :blush:

I like you and I don't know you! (Because of the LOTR)

Specializes in Geriatrics, Dialysis.
I'm part of the IL club too. Lovely weather we're having this week?

I am somewhat north of you IL folks, but I can sure relate! We went from an admittedly unseasonably warm 35 degrees to minus 12 [not including the ever fun wind chill] in a span of less than 36 hours. OUCH!

To keep on topic...I've relearned, as I need to every year, how much bitter cold sucks when you have to get out of a warm bed to drive to work

I am somewhat north of you IL folks, but I can sure relate! We went from an admittedly unseasonably warm 35 degrees to minus 12 [not including the ever fun wind chill] in a span of less than 36 hours. OUCH!

To keep on topic...I've relearned, as I need to every year, how much bitter cold sucks when you have to get out of a warm bed to drive to work

Pssst, the topic is the Worst. lady parts. Ever.

Specializes in Geriatrics, Dialysis.
Pssst, the topic is the Worst. lady parts. Ever.

So sorry Far, my mistake ...let's see if I can fix this to really fit the topic then. If the Worst.lady parts.Ever happens to be large enough to generate a Wind Chill of minus 21 then will I be back on topic? I just can't think of a thing to add the smell though.

About this lady parts thing... what was the diagnosis? :roflmao:

About this lady parts thing... what was the diagnosis? :roflmao:

That is the million dollar question, KK.

Specializes in critical care.
About this lady parts thing... what was the diagnosis? :roflmao:

Worst news possible! (For us, not her.)

She was discharged the shift after I had her and was given a referral to follow up outpatient with an OB/Gyn asap. So unless she comes back and has healthcare literacy enough to share the details (I have doubts), this will forever remain a mystery.

I am the disappoint. [emoji17]

Specializes in Telemetry.

^^^^ *snort*

Too funny.

You know, throughout my college career, I learned how, like our ears, our lady partss are "self-cleaning" and therfore do not require umm, intervention on our part. Yeah, I have to say, some models - er, lady partss - I've encountered in my nursing career did not seem to have that particular ability. :eek:

Come to think of it, I've seen some ears that seemed to have a malfunctioning "self-cleaning" mode as well. :D

"The lady parts was discharged"

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