I was not directly involved in this adventure but the whole thing got me to wondering if anyone else has experienced this and how they (or their facility) handled it.
This weekend we had a resident die. It was not an unexpected death but the event occurred a bit sooner than expected. Anyways, the family was notified of the event but had no wishes to come to our facility. Unfortunately, no mortuary had been designated. The family declined to name one because they did not wish to be responsible for the bill.
In the end, after 12 hours, the family committed to cremation society which is the most frugal option available.
Anyone have anything similar occur in their career or facility?
In these economic times this is happening even more than usual. People will not claim the body because they fear being held resposnible for expenses before and after death. Two or three years ago there was a man on TV who admitted he deliberately abandoned his mother's body at a hospital because he did not want to be responsible for the expenses incured in burying her. But then something happened to her body that infuriated him. I forget what it was, either her body was turned over to a medical school or he thought she was going to be buried and they cremated her. He had the unmitigated gall to go on TV and complain to reporters. I was agast. I would be so ashamed to have the public find out that I abandoned my mom in death, I couldn't imagine anouncing it on TV.
My greatest fear is not death. My greatest fear would be that I would die and my family would put an ad in the paper asking for donations from the community to help bury me. That in my opinion, is a fate worse than death. I would like to prepay for my cremation now. However, I am not sick now and what if I decide I want to move elsewhere in the future? Would I be able to get my money back from the local cremation services or would I be out of luck? Does anyone know if you can get your cremation money back if you move?
My greatest fear is not death. My greatest fear would be that I would die and my family would put an ad in the paper asking for donations from the community to help bury me. That in my opinion, is a fate worse than death. I would like to prepay for my cremation now. However, I am not sick now and what if I decide I want to move elsewhere in the future? Would I be able to get my money back from the local cremation services or would I be out of luck? Does anyone know if you can get your cremation money back if you move?
This is called preneed services. Usually, if you pay for something with a particular facility, they will not give your money back. It depends upon the contract so watch that fine print.
Would it be a good idea to anticipate that it's actually a financial issue and explain that there are low-cost options for the family? Like others have said, maybe it's fear of going into 5-10K debt if they step foot in a hospital to claim the body. Once the contact explicity says or implies that they will not be claiming the body, could we say something like, "I thought you might want to know that there are some low cost options for your relative's remains--in the neighborhood of $XXX--to pursue if you should change your mind. We have a person here you could talk to about that, if financial issues are a concern."
While I realize that there are various reasons why someone might abandon a body at a hospital, at least this response addresses one of those reasons proactively.
I completely understand the family side in certain situations. My husband was 20 when his mother died. His Dad was off doing drugs, as was his sister. He was working two jobs and trying to go to school to become an x-ray tech, barely surviving. Of course he was the only one who showed up, and he got stuck with the bill....even at the cheapest rate it was still a lot of money for him. It was the hair that broke the camel's back, and cause him to go into debt to where he had to drop out of school and was still working as a truck driver when we met.
Things are better now, but not everyone is financially equipped to handle a family situation when no one prepared. I always felt so bad for him, he had to mourn his mother's death alone, and then take care of the bill alone.
I am an Assistant Coroner for a local coroner's office. (I love reading everyones blogs; I will be finishing pre-reqs soon, retiring, and applying for nursing school. This is the reason I am on this website).
In our county this actually happens on a daily basis. People die all the time without next of kin. The situations vary from each person. If a person is in a nursing home and have no next of kin, they either have a "pre-need" or a county conservator who has everything in place when death does occur. However, sometimes a person dies before anything has been established. As the coroner's office, we take jurisdiction over the death and remove the decedent to the county morgue. We do our due diligence to find any next of kin, if no one is found after 30 days, the county public administrator, county health department doctor, and the coroner, assume responsibility, signs the death certificate, and the decedent is cremated and forever kept in storage.
I recently had a patient that was estranged from his family because of alcoholism and abuse. When he died his family never claimed the body so the local funeral home buried him. the government apys when this happens.(I am in Canada)
I was surprised to see resposes about the family not coming to the facility. I should have clarified that tid-bit to explain that they were afraid if they showed up they would be on the hook. I try to not pass judgement on people coming or not coming to visit or in these situations. One never knows the family dynamics.
I can understand the fright of being held for the cost of burial when you can't possibly afford it. People are having a hard enough time hanging on themseves- getting hit with a 1400 cremation cost might be well beyond someones means or put them in a bad spot. I shudder at cost of the full ride services.
I can't begin to even guess the pain one would have not being able to do this for a loved one and having to walk away to save yourself.
Can't they just donate the body to science? I at least want all of my organs donated when I die, (if they are still good), if not my body donated if I have no children. I already told my husband I WILL be a donor so he knows.
I asked my mom if she was going to be a donor and she said "no". When I asked why, she said "I just think it's too weird."
I don't get it! Especially since I have had 2 meniscal allografts, you think she'd understand the importance of it.
Well this may sound a little crude but if all you want to do is have the body disposed of there is also the alternative of not picking up the body and in Florida I understand the funeral homes have to take turns in picking up the bodies and cremating them for free. If you do not want the ashes or a viewing of the body this is likely better than paying extravagant fees for having the service done. Crud but efficient after all all that is left is Ashes.
Does anyone know if you can get your cremation money back if you move?
:lol2:
oramar
5,758 Posts
In these economic times this is happening even more than usual. People will not claim the body because they fear being held resposnible for expenses before and after death. Two or three years ago there was a man on TV who admitted he deliberately abandoned his mother's body at a hospital because he did not want to be responsible for the expenses incured in burying her. But then something happened to her body that infuriated him. I forget what it was, either her body was turned over to a medical school or he thought she was going to be buried and they cremated her. He had the unmitigated gall to go on TV and complain to reporters. I was agast. I would be so ashamed to have the public find out that I abandoned my mom in death, I couldn't imagine anouncing it on TV.