What to do with a bf who just wants me for my degree

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Hello all, & happy new year. It has been some time since posting on this site, but I don't really have a lot of friends to consult with about a certain issue I'm facing during nursing school. I only have 12 months left of my program & my child's father seems to want to work things out all of a sudden. Background info:

We were together for 7 years.

Went through a lot of turmoil, which resulted in him breaking up with me.

I predominately raise our child alone during the week, whether I'm in school or not, which has been very tough.

My family helps financially with most of our needs.

Anyway, I found some messages on his phone between him and his friend after I borrowed his cell to make a call. Basically he presumes that RN's make a ton of money, & that I'll be supporting him, our child, his child from a previous relationship, & MYSELF after graduating! I've never been a gold digger, but he works a dead end job & has no education. I forced myself into believing I loved him, but this does it. How should I dump him? We don't live together....I just feel so alone. I dropped all friends to responsibly raise my child & dedicate myself to nursing school. I was looking forward to someone to genuinely be there for me & take interest in my life. :( Thanks for reading, if you did. Have a blessed day/night.

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Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia.

Hell yes you should dump him! There are plenty of decent, respectable men out there who will not view you as an ATM. finish school, settle in and start looking.

I wish you well. You deserve better than this jerk.

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Specializes in ED, psych.

Amen to MeanMaryJean. You're too good for him, OP. Own it!

You sound like a strong, hardworking soul ... and a good mama.

Only *you* can decide *how* to dump him, however. I can think of many humiliating ways ... but those might not be of benefit to your specific situation :up:.

You deserve better than this douchebag. Just remember that ... someone WILL genuinely care and be there for you. Just not him.

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Thank you for your responses, ladies. I've been kind of depressed all day, but I agree. Dropping him like a hot potato will benefit not only myself, but my child as well.

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Dump him, period.

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Specializes in Critical Care, Education.

Agree Completely. You're headed for a bright future. There's no telling how high you can fly after you eliminate the anchor that's dragging you down. It may also be wise to seek qualified legal assistance to restrict his custody of your child... or you could face the very real possibility of having to pay him child support.

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HOW to dump him is up to you. But do it, you already know this and are just looking for support that you made the right decision. Here it is, you did make the right decision, and now just need to let him know about it! Time to take out the trash!

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Absolutely. So many women do the right thing for their kids (i.e., dumping the loser) and then discover it hasn't done them any harm to dump him either.

You will be a far, far better role model for your kiddo as a strong, responsible working person who has the self-respect to associate with people who aren't like your ex.

Agree with getting some legal advice. Sure, it might cost you some now. Nothing to what NOT getting it will cost you (and your kiddo) later.

Good luck!

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My daughter's boyfriend expressed the same sentiments when she was in nursing school. When she heard his opinions and plans, she wasted no time in dumping him. You have made the right decision to rid yourself of this parasite.

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Specializes in NICU.

And now from a guy's perspective.... Dump his butt immediately. You need to change your mindset towards a mate. You have to set standards for what you will accept (and don't set the bar low). There will be plenty of men that have a stable job, treat you and your child with love and respect that you deserve, and will challenge you to be a better person by the way they live their lives. Is your ex the kind of role model you want for your child?

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Leave.

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Buh bye now. He's got to go.

You're doing great things for you and your future - he sounds like the kind of guy that will suck the life out of you - financially and emotionally.

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